Tuesday, June 21, 2005

TomKat & Brangelina

y'know, I feel somehow as if I have been remiss in my duties as a starf***er since I rarely indulge in gossip. Used to be that I lived for it. Sorry to be so late for the party but I figured I oughta say something given that I already ignored Rascal Crowe and the phone incident...


Oh sure it's kind of perversely hilarious to watch InTouch's increasingly misogynistic headlines each week as they follow their own manufactured Angelina vs. Jennifer wars in the wake of the Pitt split. But it's also disheartening and does a disservice to all parties involved. Brad, is after all something of a refined guy, into architecture and nesting, etc... Angelina and Jennifer also are both far removed from the trailer trash persona realm of, say, Britney Spears. My hunch is that neither Angie nor Jen, richer than we civilians could ever imagine being, don't need Brad to support them. Just a hunch. And correct me if I'm wrong but neither of them have let themselves go. Are they really in need of "sexy makeovers" to win back any man? It is to laugh. This is more Ricki Lake or Jerry Springer in print than it could ever possibly be in reality.


The other ongoing celeb-watching story is the mad courtship and instant-true-love of Tom Cruise & Katie Holmes. Now, many of us have known/suspected for years that Cruise was nutso. I would be inclined to ignore the current fiasco on the "told ya so" level except for that it's making me rethink Nicole Kidman all over again. And, I do not want to do that.

You may be asking: How is Kidman hurt by this? After all, on the surface she ends up looking like a rose. But that's just for now. Let me explain. Everyone is kind of laughing at Cruise for his rapid descent in taste; Nicole Kidman to Penelope Cruz to Katie Holmes? The talent or beauty level dropping each time. (Not that Penelope and Katie are without talent or beauty. But in comparison to Kidman who has proven herself a true and probably enduring movie star, it just doesn't cast a flattering light on the spoils) So, initially, Kidman can still bask in her own earned glow. But the more suspicious the general public gets about Cruise's affairs, the more they may begin to remember that that relationship also seemed a little bizarre during its time.

If you'll recall Kidman was a veritable unknown in the stateswhen she hooked up with Cruise and became, with the release of her first American feature, Days of Thunder, an above-title star. It's not like she toiled away for years working for that status. She either had sensational management or the good fortune to be ambitious, in the right place at the right time, and eager to replace Mimi Rogers as Mrs. Tom Cruise just when the Cruise camp needed a replacement bride. Pronto. It's also no secret, though semi-forgotten as her star has dimmed, that Mimi Rogers is one of the rare Hollywood folks not intimidated by the Cruise machine. She has publicly dissed him issuing hilarious bon mots from time to time particularly in the early days of the mad courtship and instant-true-love of Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman.

OK, now I have to wash my hands. I feel dirty just thinking about all of this...

You can read some great/scary/hilarious/freaky things about publicity tour/nightmare relationships fromDefamer & of course Defamer, Secrets and Lies, roger friedman, and Free Katie, Conversation About...,Pop Culture Junkies, The Answer Bitch, Chortler, FametrackerRainbow Networkand New York Daily News. Thanks to Towleroad and Low Resolution for some of these links.


adam k. said...

I feel like the only movie I've ever seen Cruise in where he seemed genuinely normal was Jerry Maguire. He really seemed like a nice, likeable guy, not a big movie star or a crazy religious fanatic. Every other movie he's just been a little off. I really don't like him. He scares me.
And Katie Holmes has stated that she "grew up wanting to marry Tom Cruise" so it's no wonder she'd buy into his "love". Like, if in 5 or 10 years I managed to meet Rufus Wainwright and he suddenly fell in love with me (even though it seems now that it could NEVER happen), I'd sure as hell get with him. Especially if I wanted a music career. I don't fault Katie. Tom's just insane.

darkcypherlad said...

What's with the whole name mashing anyway? I can understand "Bennifer," since that courtship was a fiasco from the get go, but "Brangelina" and now "TomKat"? Maybe I'm out of the tabloid loop, but it seems to me these "relationships" are too new to ascend to the absurd level that the whole Ben and Jen thing accomplished awhile ago. I mean, there was never a "LizRich" or a "Tracburn." Is it pure laziness, or something else?

Sorry, I just had to rant.