I link through all this... before you wake up... so I can be happier

to be linked again with you... ♫

Kenneth in the (212) Fun couples at the Emmys. I hadn't seen some of these photos. Cute!
Just Jared The new cast of Dancing with the Stars. I don't watch it but I do find it amusing in a meta way that Jennifer Grey of Dirty Dancing fame will compete.
/Film Dozens of new photos from The Social Network


popbytes I so wish I was in Venice right now for Black Swan.* (yes more on this later today) In a perverse way I hope that Darren Aronofsky does take that X-Men Origins: Wolverine sequel.
The Playlist I forgot to mention that someone finally gave primo scene-stealer Ari Graynor a lead role. That someone was David Gordon Green. I guess he's just smarter than other directors.
USA Today Lindsay Lohan talking to Vanity Fair. She claims she's still a "damn good actress." You always were Linds so prove it again. You can't keep resting on 1998-2004.
Pop Eater Sofía Vergara's boyfriend is in politics? Huh, who knew.
Movie|Line ewwww. the bedbug epidemic has reached Toronto. Will it hurt the Film Festival?

Late tonight... the next episode of Hit Me With Your Best Shot features A Face in the Crowd. Are you joining in?

Robyn doing Björk whilst Björk watches. No pressure or anything.



"Hyperballad" is such a goodie.

Vanity Fair "Dolls"

It's that time of year again. Vanity Fair refers to these nine actresses as "dolls" and we're certainly not here to dispute their smooth porcelain loveliness (the median age here is 23 and they're all lily white). But when I hear "dolls" now I think of only the Dollhouse, and I'm wondering just what "imprints" we're dealing with here. Which one of these girls is actually a savage killer? Or skilled in all positions of the kama sutra? Or a hostage negotiator? Or a genius computer programmer?


But more importantly, which of them will seem like a big "duh" for the cover treatment seven or eight years from now and which will be like a, "who...what now?". If you click on the Vanity Fair label below you can see past investigations of this Hollywood Issue's covergirls (and boys).

Abbie Cornish. Kristen Stewart. Carey Mulligan. Amanda Seyfried. Rebecca Hall. Mia Wasikowska. Emma Stone. Evan Rachel Wood. Anna Kendrick. Where will they be in 2020: The A-List? In the land of obscurity? headlining a TV series? at the Kodak Theater? Uninsurable has-been? Box Office Queen?

I know I ask too many questions but which doll do you want for your own? And which invisible doll (in this age range) are you angry you can't see on this magazine cover?

Vanity Fair's Hollywood ~ Episode 12 (2006)

Missed previous episodes? See: 1995 , 1996, 1997, 1998 , 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004 and 2005

This Hollywood history series is nearing its end point as we approach the here and now. After two relatively safe / similar Hollywood covers: actresses + gowns = glamour. discuss, Vanity Fair shook things up to instant water cooler success in 2006.

click to enlarge for maximum blinding cheekiness

Tom Ford, 44, was ditching fashion for Hollywood (his directorial debut will supposedly emerge soon), and VF had him nuzzling Keira Knightley as Scarlett Johansson languorously lounged before them in nubile albino glory. Was the empty black space to your left...

• a compositional must?
• a place in which to photoshop oneself for an imagined ménage à quatre?
• an homage to every ethnic actor they'd ever shoved into the last fold of the covers?
  

Scarlett Johansson was 21 going on 22. You're forgiven if you assumed she was the niece of not one but all of Conde Nast's top executives. Three Hollywood covers in a row! Perhaps they should just have replaced the"Hollywood" tradition with an annual "Scarlett" issue. They could document every step of her career. They could string famous actresses across the cover each year, dressed up like Scarlett Johannson's film characters.

But who would play each Scarlett?

Keira Knightley was just turning 21 and enjoying her first Oscar nomination for Pride & Prejudice. She was also promoting her second Pirates of the Caribbean and a few months away from filming Atonement. "Come back to me!" [sniffle]
*
average age: 29.
noticeably absent: Clothing. Also: Rachel McAdams, who was booked to be in Tom Ford's place but due to a "conniption of modesty" walked away leaving us forever wondering what she had planned to whisper in Keira's ear. "Come back to me!"?
collective Oscar stats before cover: 1 nomination (Keira's)
collective Oscar stats after cover: none. Keira's Atonement campaign didn't take.
fame levels in 2009, according to famousr, from most to least: Scarlett than Keira.
previous episodes: 1995 ,1996, 1997, 1998, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004 and 2005.

don't miss the last two episodes and a possible bonus round.

Vanity Fair's Hollywood ~ Episode 11 (2005)

Missed previous episodes? See: 1995 , 1996, 1997, 1998 , 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003 and 2004.

Vanity Fair briefly killed my enthusiasm for the "Hollywood project" when they nixed the traditional cover for 2009. But time heals most wounds and I have reanimated the project's corpse. 2004's cover had 13 already peaking actresses on it. How'd they follow it in 2005? With another batch of goddesses, 60% of whom had already graced their "Hollywood" cover. In the case of the C/Kates, it was now thrice. Was Vanity Fair running out of ideas? Given the idiosyncratic pool the covers regularly pulled from you'd think there were only 40 actresses in Hollywood... but then, it's probably all in who you know who represents you when it comes to face time here. It's definitely not only about the fame. Consider this: this cover series lasted from 1995 - 2008 and Angelina Jolie, Halle Berry, Michelle Williams and Tilda Swinton never appeared on them (just four chronologically appropriate examples off the top of my head).

click to enlarge for maximum beauty

For reasons that only pop culture archives will be able to fully explain to future generations this cover was called "Not So Desperate Housewives". Only two of these actresses were even married at the time (the C/Kates) and only six kids had sprung from their enviable DNA (two kids each for Cate, Kate and Uma).

Uma Thurman, about to turn 35, had appeared on VF's very first Hollywood issue back in 1995. Back then she was celebrating her deserved Oscar nom for Pulp Fiction. I like to think that her get up here, white shirt and black pants (the only one of the ladies eschewing a gown), was a nod to "Mia Wallace" in Pulp Fiction. It would make sense. Director Quentin Tarantino had just finished (momentarily) resuscitating her talent and fame with those thrilling Kill Bills and she was about to risk memories of that film with the John Travolta dance number in Be Cool. She had divorced Ethan Hawke in 2004 and the three films coming out (Prime, Be Cool and The Producers) were a nice range of drama, comedy and musical... on paper. Onscreen it didn't work out so well. More flops followed. Uma turns 40 in 2010, and she's undoubtedly looking for that third career wind. Next up: Motherhood, Percy Jackson and Eloise in Paris.

Cate Blanchett had just been won an Oscar (The Aviator) and was about to turn 36. Aside from the Oscar win, 2005 was quiet. Blanchett never stays quiet. The next four years would be jam packed full of Oscar bait and trips down the red carpet culminating in the two biggest non-Hobbity hits of her career (Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button). No films in 2009 (shocker!) but she'll be back in 2010 as Maid Marian in Ridley Scott's Robin Hood [see previous posts]

Kate Winslet was 29 years old, still Oscar-less and an old pro at the "Hollywood" covers. Uma & Cate are her superiors when it comes to behaving like models in photoshoots (think about it), but she wasn't letting them pull all the focus with her sleek über sexy look here. Her inarguable triumph in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004) was about to prove very difficult to follow. Fascinating time capsule note: 2005 is the year wherein she guest starred on "Extras" as a foul mouthed narcissistic "Kate Winslet", bitching about having to do a Holocaust drama to win an Oscar.



Despite that hilariously written and performed prophecy, her next several films didn't truly catch on (The Holiday, Little Children, Romance & Cigarettes, Revolutionary Road and All the Kings Men). The happy ending punchline arrived earlier this year when she won her Oscar for the holocaust drama The Reader. Up next: Nothing. With Oscar in hand, I'm guessing she lays low for the next couple of years. She was never a ubiquitous celebrity to begin with.

Scarlett Johansson was just 20 and already a back to back Hollywood covergirl. She had skyrocketed in 2003 with the global success of Lost in Translation, the critical success of Girl with a Pearl Earring and her high profile relationship with another Young Hollywood star, Josh Hartnett. And though nothing in 2004 had added much to her mystique she had the lead in a would be summer blockbuster for 2005 (The Island, which flopped). No one at the time saw her Woody Allen's muse status coming, but Match Point (their first collaboration) was about to debut at Cannes and become the legendary director's biggest hit in over a decade. Cut to several Scarlett roles and three calendar years later: she's beloved as a celebrity, newlywed and spokesperson but who loves her as an actress, any more? Can she turn that around with her stint as The Black Widow in Iron Man 2 (see previous post)

<-- Rupert Everett, Claire Danes and Billy Crudup at the premiere of Stage Beauty in October 2004

Claire Danes, turning 26 appears to have been slain by ScarJo. And maybe she was. Hollywood only has room for a handful of young superstar blondes in any given time period, you know. Perhaps she's prone as sacrifice for Cate, Kate and Uma none of whom have ceded much space for up and comers, holding onto big fame with that iron grip combo of talent, beauty and the favor of important filmmakers. Or maybe Mary-Louise Parker had snuck in to lay her down? It had only been a year since the gossip machine had ground and spit Claire Danes and Billy Crudup out for splitting with their partners -- in Billy's case, the several months pregnant Parker.

Which is all along way of saying that her cover girl status was slightly puzzling. Despite Danes' absolutely stellar start in television's My So Called Life and a promising initial silver screen transfer (Little Women and Romeo + Juliet), the movie career never really worked out. Her career had slipped in the late 90s and the Aughts brought nothing but a string of well performed but small supporting roles (The Hours, Igby Goes Down) or lead parts that didn't do much for her (Terminator 3, Stage Beauty). This trend continued after this cover, too: The Family Stone, Stardust, Evening and Shopgirl haven't provided breakthroughs. Up next: Temple Grandin in which she plays an autistic scientist. Should she try headlining a TV series again?

Rosario Dawson about to turn 26, had been on the cover before and had just caused a mini-fuss with her scene stealing nudity and feral performance in Alexander (2004). Vanity Fair's cover indicated a good sized year for her and it was: Sin City and Rent "I wanna go ouu--uuuuuttt, tonight" both premiered.


Zhang Ziyi newly 26, had enjoyed a high international profile since her breakthrough in Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, five years earlier. The preceding months had been very good to her with three well received successful imports: 2046 (her best performance if you ask me), Hero and House of Flying Daggers. But she was undoubtedly on this cover because everyone in the world seemed to be anxiously awaiting Memoirs of a Geisha, then only a blockbuster book and not yet a disappointing movie. She was making lists like People magazine's 50 Most Beautiful, she was a frequent object of lust in men's magazines. Once the Memoirs craze ended, things went quiet, though one can still spot her on red carpets or in paparazzi shots with venture capitalist boyfriend Vivi Nevo. Is an international comeback going to happen? She's only 30. Next up: Sophie's Revenge and possibly the romantic drama Waiting which would reunite her with her Daggers co-star, Takeshi Kaneshiro, her only co-star to ever challenge her for "prettiest person in this movie" contests.

Kerry Washington, 28, had just appeared in the Oscar nominated biopic Ray and was still dating actor David Moscow (pictured together right, Jan. 2005) Many people, including yours truly, were pulling for major stardom for Kerry. She's still high profile and highly castable (young, beautiful, talented, speaks multiple languages including very handy ones for the cinema: French and Spanish) and yet the cinema can't seem to figure it out. 2005 brought only bit parts in Mr & Mrs. Smith and Fantastic Four. When will Hollywood ever figure out big careers for the top black actresses? It seems hopelessly beyond Tinseltown's capabilities. Things are still about the same for Kerry. She'll give a great performance (The Last King of Scotland, Dead Girl) and it's like it didn't happen at all in the larger scheme of the star hierarchies. It's so frustrating. Will her new projects turn the tide? Next up: A Thousand Words with Eddie Murphy and a possibly plum possibly Oscar-bait supporting role in Mother and Child starring Annette Bening.

Kate Bosworth, 22, was fresh off the underrated romantic comedy Win a Date With Tad Hamilton! and the flop biopic Beyond the Sea starring Kevin Spacey. She was very high profile in the celebrity-watching sector as Orland Bloom's girlfriend and Hollywood seemed to have faith in her. She was soon given the Lois Lane role in Superman Returns (unfortunate casting, that). Her film career has long since been smaller than her celebrity and she hasn't actually been making many movies. Next up: The Warrior's Way.

Sienna Miller, at 23 was, like Kate Bosworth, far more famous than her filmography would imply. She was Jude Law's new fiancé -- they had just made Alfie (Oct 2004, left)-- and he was at the peak of his celebrity. A few months after this Hollywood cover they broke off the engagement and their on and off again relationship has provided tabloid fodder for years now. She followed Alfie by romancing Heath Ledger in Casanova. She's been working a lot ever since (Factory Girl, Stardust, The Edge of Love, The Mysteries of Pittsburgh) but it looks doubtful that her movie career will ever equal her celebrity. Or not. Maybe she's just the right role away from more legitimate stardom? Next up: playing "The Baroness" in G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra.

PLEASE NOTE: If you'd like to read more about any of these stars, click the names in the labels section below.

*
median age: 27. Blanchett was the eldest, Scarlett the baby.
noticeably absent: Who else was topical 'round mid 2004 to mid 2005? Let's see... Monica Bellucci (international profile raised with The Matrix films and The Passion of the Christ), Jennifer Garner (transferring to movies with 13 Going on 30 and Electra), Eva Mendes (had 4 movies coming out including Hitch), Lindsay Lohan (Mean Girls) and maybe Sophie Okonedo (Hotel Rwanda)
collective Oscar stats before cover: 7 noms / 1 win (all by the front cover girls. Blanchett won for The Aviator)
collective Oscar stats after cover: 5 nominations / 1 win (3 for Cate, 2 for Kate)
fame levels in 2009, according to famousr, from most to least: Uma Thurman, Scarlett Johansson, Cate Blanchett, Kate Bosworth, Claire Danes, Sienna Miller, Rosario Dawson and Kerry Washington. Not listed in famousr for some bizarre reason: Kate Winslet & Zhang Ziyi.
previous episodes: 1995 ,1996, 1997, 1998, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003 and 2004.
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Hump Day Hotness: Marital Bliss

Have you seen Vanity Fair's list of Hollywood's rarest unions: the longterm actor/actress marriage? I don't need to tell you that most Tinseltown marriages end in divorce. Yet some couple stick by each other and anyone in a long term relationship or marriage will know what a feat that often is. The immortal Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward are the longest lasting dual movie star marriage -- they were married for 50 years before Newman's death (2008, RIP). But the lengthiest dual actor marriages ever? The Reagans with 52 years and, up at the tippity top, recent Oscar nominee Ruby Dee (American Gangster) and Ossie Davis (2005, RIP) with 56 years of happily ever after.


I'm sure you've heard the famous Newman paraphrase about fidelity

Why fool around with hamburger when you have steak at home?

but what I loved most about their celebrated marriage was that they weren't overly sentimental about it in interviews, often admitting that couples can drive each other nuts, and regularly implying that patience and space are required -- they probably weren't co-dependent nuts in other words. They were able to do things without the other. The sense of humor also definitely helped. I hadn't read this before but I love the inscription on Newman's wedding gift (sherry glasses and a silver cup) to Woodward in 1958

So you wound up with Apollo / If he's sometimes hard to swallow / Use this.

The longest SAG marriages still running: Paula Prentiss (The Stepford Wives) and Richard Benjamin (Portnoy's Complaint) who've been together since 1961 and Oscar winner Olympia Dukakis and Louis Zorich (Mad About You) who've been together since 1962.

The only thing unsatisfying about a very satisfying stability-list like this is that a lot of star couples skip the matrimony part* so it's not entirely accurate. Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins have been together for 21 years now and have yet to marry. And then there's the 26 year situation between Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell.

Clockwise, top left: Patricia Wetting & Ken Olin, Tim Robbins &
Susan Sarandon (not married), Helena Bonham-Carter & Tim Burton (not
married), Dukakis & Zurich,The Beatty / The Bening, Will and Jada, Amy
Madigan & Ed Harris and Jamie Lee Curtis & Christopher Guest.

Two weeks back I attended a wedding in Austin which was multi-racial / multi-cultural (Japanese and American) and multi-religious (Shinto, Unitarian, Mormon) and included a moment to honor those who can't be legally married yet (the bride, a longtime friend of mine, has two mommies and two daddies). It was awesome. So anyone who thinks Rachel Getting Married was pure east coast liberal fiction can suck it! My point, which I haven't even gotten to, is this: Ain't love grand? ... and complicated ... and hard to measure... and worth celebrating whether it's fresh or well aged and whether or not there's a wedding certificate?! Celebrate it!

Truth, Beauty, Freedom...
and above all things, Love

P.S. Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johansson (aka "Abs & Boobs") have now been married for 7½ months !

<--- P.S. 2 Check out this awesome photograph of Newman and Woodward at home, just a few years into their marriage. SO adorable. Thanks to Catherine for pointing the way to it.

previously on hump day hotties:
April Fools, Battlestar Galactica, Carla Gugino, Juliette Binoche, Gael Garcia Bernal & Diego Luna and many more...

Pedro & Penélope / Quentin & Diane

My best friend Jensen, whose favorite filmmakers are Andrei Tarkovsky and Pedro Almodóvar, brought me home this Spanish Vanity Fair (pictured left, April 2009) from his trip to Barcelona. Before he left he kept imagining fourgies with Javier Bardem, Penélope Cruz and Scarlett Johansson. He was okay with any combo should one of them be unavailable. His cinematically inspired fantasy did not come to pass but things did heat up: he nearly burned down his hotel room. True story (!) albeit not for this blog.

Here in the States April's Vanity Fair cover gave us the overexposed Apatow boys. I demand a refund!

I can't read Spanish but I like pretty pictures and they require no linguistic skills.


I love pretending that Penélope is a badass harpist, don't you? Not every actress can pluck those multi-colored strings. It's a rarified skill.

Speaking of directors and their muses...

Did you see Sunday's NY Times Magazine? The piece on Quentin Tarantino is a good read and the photos are wicked, saucily playing up QT's well known foot fetish. Wiggling those big toes aside for a moment, I love this quote when he's asked about Pulp Fiction's Palme D'Or win in 1994 and who the jury president was.

Clint Eastwood. And the second head of the jury was Catherine Deneuve. I think of her as the queen of France. So having the queen judge your movie is scary until you remember that she did Belle de Jour. She turned out to be one of my bigger defenders. She's spent an entire career supporting directors who pushed the envelope, from Buñuel to Jean-Pierre Melville to Godard

You mean Deneuve isn't the queen of France? Someone needs to fix that maintenant -- let's make it official. Tarantino can be annoying but he knows cinema and great actresses and every director should.

Still, I have to admit... seeing these photos of QT drooling on Diane Kruger's gams (which somehow promotes Inglourious Basterds. Don't ask me how) made me jealous on behalf of one Uma Thurman.


If Tarantino is suddenly going to be prolific again (here's hoping) can he please put Uma back in the driver's seat where she belongs? Few other filmmaker seem likely to do it.
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The Link Ness Monster

Jane Fonda's Blog!!! Why is it that it took me 29 whole days to discover that she was writing a blog? I lurve me some Fonda. Topics so far have included the inauguration, her father as Abraham Lincoln, dreams of Bob Redford, her dog, her dressing room (she's rehearsing for a play) and Danny Boyle --yes, Slumdog Millionaire has invaded ever nook and cranny of everything. I am pretty sure that Slumdog Millionaire was appearing in some way on every channel on my cable box yesterday and every website I visited, too. I think I accidentally sprinkled some Slumdog Millionaire on my pizza today. If you cut me I would bleed Slumdog Millionaire. (February 23rd can't come quickly enough!)

Mighty God King defines "nerdy". It needed to be done
TMZ assaults Oscar nominee Richard Jenkins with questions at the airport. I don't think he's used to this treatment, god bless.
Slant insightful piece on Oscar's best score category
Erik Lundegaard gives out "Lundys", a fun award for the best review of each Best Picture nominee
Pop Elegantarium Harold and Maude finger puppets? I'm dying here


popbytes Scarjo is blonde no more!
The Bad and the Ugly brings together all the Dollhouse promos. Eliza Dushku makes me drool. Drooling is not good for keyboards
Ephemerist on the preparations for the Scott Pilgrim soundtrack
The Carpetbagger amused by Jon Stewart's take on Benjamin Button. Have you seen it? So funny.
Pets Who Want to Kill Themselves Poor Puppy Bale. Daddy is a mean one

..and a couple of Vanity Fair Hollywood Issue photoshoots for Australia and The Wrestler




Here are some photos if that vid is not enough... and how could it be since there's no ... COVER. Argh.

Nathaniel is Ready for a Fight

I love Barack Obama as much as the next person who voted for him -- well, maybe not quite as much as some of the next people. I think of him as a charismatic, intelligent, erudite, inspiring and diplomatic human being but not as someone who might die for me on a cross or cure my hemorrhaging were I to touch his garment. Nevertheless, I'm super excited for a new era for American politics. But there's a time and place for everything and I do not need to be staring at the President's face, no matter who the president is, when I'm looking at the two most sacred Oscar season covers in magazine-land. The Oscar cover of EW was strange enough but now he's on my beloved "Hollywood" cover of Vanity Fair instead of that highly discussable rotating parade of a dozen stars?


What is going on here??? Calm down Conde Naste / Time Warner drones! Obama is awesome but he's not a movie star. And he's only been in office 14 days. Can we let him work at the job for awhile?

This kind of spoils what I had planned for my long running "Vanity Fair Hollywood" series (click the label to see the old ones) unless Barack Obama has a movie career somewhere that I don't know about. If he does, send me screeners so I may review.

But on a more frustrating note this overselling and pedestal raising of President Obama in the usually semi apolitical entertainment arenas is not helpful. It just gives more ammunition to all the wingnuts out there who love to sell those stupid "liberal media" conspiracies that make it easy for people to play scapegoating games and to excuse their avoidance of any contact with actual reality. In short, I hate it when the far right gets to seem semi lucid instead of batshit crazy.
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Vanity Fair's Hollywood ~ Episode 10 (2004)

Missed previous episodes? See: 1995 , 1996, 1997, 1998 , 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004 and 2005

With the annual Vanity Fair "Hollywood" issue about to debut for 2009 -- I'm guessing we see the new cover in less than two weeks (UPDATE: the new cover has been leaked and Vanity Fair has chucked their traditional photo shoot *sniffle* for the millionth magazine cover featuring President Obama), let's briefly return to our Vanity Fair retrospectives. "Send in the Gowns" was the title of 2004's photo shoot and they returned to the first year's game plan of glamour girls. The cover was more crowded though, bringing us an unlucky 13. But who was this cover unlucky for?


Maybe all of them, with the exception of Maggie Gyllenhaal (hurrah) and Hilary Swank (known affectionately around these parts as Beelzebub), who was just 11 months away from her second Oscar. Vanity Fair had gotten less daring in their cover selections as the year's passed (at least in terms of fresh "they'll be famous!" proclamations), but many of these careers had arguably peaked and were headed downhill.

Strange coincidence: 23% of these women are starring in He's Just Not That Into You

Julianne Moore was 43 at the time. She had been on the first "Hollywood" edition in spring '95 (before anyone had seen [Safe]) and got a deserved promotion. In the 9 years between the covers she'd gone from gorgeous up and coming redhead to a famously talented familiar actress as well as an Oscar nom' magnet. Unfortunately, round about this time as her fame and price kept escalating, she stopped wowing. 2004 brought her her only solo film-carrying "hit" in the traditional sense (The Forgotten) but it also brought stinkers like Laws of Attraction and films that no one even knows exist like Marie and Bruce (the only Moore film I haven't managed to get my eyes on). She's been misfiring both critically and box office wise since though she did have small roles in two acclaimed films Children of Men and I'm Not There.

This past year's double Moore dip, Savage Grace and Blindness (FB Body of Work nomination), reminded us that she's a unique and formidable dramatic actress... when she's not trying to be a romantic comedienne or action heroine. Next: She has three films in the can for 2009: the lead in a thriller (uh oh -- not playing to her strengths!) called Shelter, and supporting roles in the dramas The Private Lives of Pippa Lee and fashion god Tom Ford's filmmaking debut A Single Man.

Jennifer Connelly was 33 newly married to fine actor Paul Bettany and had just starred in a hit that everybody thought of as a flop (Hulk) and an Oscar misfire of sorts (House of Sand and Fog) but she was still considered a major get. Only she wouldn't be got. So to speak. She took only co-lead or supporting roles that didn't do much for her in Oscar Bait projects that didn't hook any statues (Little Children, Reservation Road, Blood Diamond) and now she's doing CGI flicks (The Day the Earth Stood Still and Inkheart). Is there a second wind to this career? And if there is, doesn't it need to come very soon? Next: He's Just Not That Into You and then Creation, a Charles Darwin biopic where she and her husband will play the Darwins.

Gwyneth Paltrow, 31, was still arguably suffering from the Oscar Curse -- that messy career period that can follow an Oscar win (which she won for Shakespeare in Love, discussed at length right here). The Royal Tenenbaums and Sylvia had reminded that she had plenty of acting skill but something about the career wasn't taking with Oscar or the public. Did she not care enough? She was a newlywed when this cover hit (to Coldplay's Chris Martin) and already pregnant with their first child, though she wasn't yet showing (she's pictured right, a few months later). Her acting career definitely went on the back burner. She's had 7 films released since this cover debuted and only one true leading role among them (Proof). She's now far more of a celebrity than an actress. The fame part stuck. Next: Two Lovers is inching it's way into view. King Lear and Iron Man 2 are coming for 2010.

Naomi Watts, 35, had recently moved out from under that 'Nicole Kidman's best friend' tag and into her own celebrity. The fresh Oscar nomination for 21 Grams (due in no small part to the Mulholland Dr lead in we're sure) went a long way towards that. She was still dating Heath Ledger, who came with her to the Oscars, but their relationship was about to end. (Thank god she convinced him to take Brokeback Mountain first!). In 2004 she had two heavy dramas and one comedy (the brilliant I Heart Huckabees) on the way. She chased those with the massive King Kong. Ever the multi-tasker since stardom hit she's still busy busy busy despite being a new mom. Next: Mother and Child for actress-loving director Rodrigo García and possibly Need with Nicole Kidman. That would be their first movie together since the charming Australian romance Flirting in 1991.

Salma Hayek, 37, still had residual heat from the success of Frida in late 2002. She had broken up with Ed Norton and was dating Josh Lucas but her movie career was about to collapse. Flops like Ask the Dust, Lonely Hearts and After the Sunset were all on the way. A savvy star she's stayed in the game by seguewaying to television production, bringing the big hit Ugly Betty to ABC and doing guest work (30 Rock). Next: "Madame Truska" in Universal's Cirque Du Freak opening in time for Halloween

Jennifer Aniston had just celebrated her 35th birthday, and her career was coming to the crossroads. She was finishing up her last season on TV's mega hit "Friends" and her marriage to Brad Pitt was also close to wrapping (though we didn't know it at the time). They divorced in late 2005 shortly before her first two post TV stardom movies (Derailed and Rumor Has It) opened. Her feature career has been middling peppered with the occasional high concept hit but she's forever ubiquitous in the media thanks to that decade in our living rooms as "Rachel" and her gossip-drenched marriage and split from Mr. Pitt. Next: the star studded romantic comedy He's Just Not That Into You

Kirsten Dunst, almost 22, was about to dump Jake Gyllenhaal (my theory as to one of the reasons people hate her so), Eternal Sunshine was playing (she does not get enough credit for her wistful funny turn in that film) and Spider-Man 2 was about to open. She was extremely famous / busy. It's been a bumpy ride since with rehab, a misunderstood star vehicle (Marie Antoinette), internet backlash and flops outside of those webslinging blockbusters. Next: All Good Things, the narrative feature debut of documentarian Andrew Jarecki (Capturing the Friedmans) opens this summer. Possibly Spider-Man 4 after that. Don't do it Kiki! Save yourself

Diane Lane, who had been famous since she was only 14 had just turned 39. She had seen her lengthy career hit a new peak with an Oscar nomination for Unfaithful in 2002 which she followed with another minor hit Under the Tuscan Sun. She was about to marry Josh Brolin whose career was still a couple years away from supersizing. More films were lining up for Lane but things aren't as rosy now since none have really matched that Unfaithful triumph and some (Kill Shot and Fierce People) had trouble even getting into theaters. Next: nothing announced.

Lucy Liu, 35, had just given the performance of her career in Kill Bill but then... that tends to happen to people when they star in Quentin Tarantino movies, doesn't it? Liu had always toggled between features and TV and she kept doing so. She's never left wanting for work but no great successes since. Next: nothing announced since her last two televisions series Lipstick Mafia and Dirty Sexy Money were both cancelled.

Hilary Swank in '04. Photographed by Stephen Meisel for Calvin Klein (photo source)

Hilary Swank, nearing 30, was on this cover because she had a frankly amazing agent. I kid, I kid. Her career post 1999 Oscar had been unremarkable. The Core was her last release prior to this cover but 2004 was looking big for her on paper (a respectable TV movie Iron Jawed Angels and a Clint Eastwood picture Million Dollar Baby -discussed here) and looks weren't deceiving. She won another Oscar for the latter and promptly returned to doing what she does: random disposable projects of multiple genres. Next: Two Oscar hopefuls for 2009 and in both of them she plays the title character. There's Amelia, a biopic in which she plays the famous aviatrix and Betty Ann Waters an Erin Brockovich style working mother turned legal eagle drama.

Alison Lohman, 24, was just off of a few high profile gigs (Big Fish, White Oleander and Matchstick Men) but her follow ups were very low profile. Tell me, have you seen: The Big White, Where the Truth Lies, Things We Lost in the Fire or Flicka? Next: Two thrillers one called simply Game leans scifi, the other Drag Me to Hell is auteur Sam Raimi's return to the horror genre. That might be something to look forward to but can it raise Lohman's profile back to early 2004 levels?

Scarlett Johansson, all of 19 years old, had just become the movies hottest young star. Offscreen she was a dynamo in the Young Hollywood scene --vaguely around this time she moved from dating Jared Leto to a fairly lengthy romance with Josh Hartnett. Onscreen she was a fresh sensation. Girl with a Pearl Earring and Lost in Translation had both opened to enviable acclaim for the young starlet and an awards run, too (though Oscar passed). When this cover was shot she was a critics darling, a paparazzi treasure and very much in demand by both auteurs and corporations (her endorsement side career might be as profitable as her film career by now). She's been super busy these past 4 years with numerous films, marrying Ryan Reynolds and that fledgling recording career. But is it quantity over quality. A lot of people are beginning to think so. Next: He's Just Not That Into You

Maggie Gyllenhaal, 27 at the time, had become ubiquitous around 2002 appearing in critical hits like Adaptation and Secretary. She and Jake her brother ascended in very close succession. The next year or so was less eventful cinematically for Maggie but two years after this cover hit she was all over the screens again delivering you-can't-look-away performances in films ranging from World Trade Center (blech) to Stranger Than Fiction to Sherrybaby and off screen she was having her first child with Peter Sarsgaard. Oscar still hasn't taken a liking to Maggie but few would argue that she isn't one of the most impressive actresses of her generation. Next: Crazy Heart a drama with Colin Farrel and Away We Go a comedy for director Sam Mendes.

PLEASE NOTE: If you'd like to read more about any of these stars, click the names in the labels section below.

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median age: 32. Julianne Moore was the mamma (isn't she always?) and ScarJo the baby.
noticeably absent: Who else was topical around 2003/2004? Let's see... Halle Berry was about to screw up her career with Catwoman, Angelina Jolie (who has never been on one of these "Hollywood" covers) had a bunch of movies about to come out, Emmy Rossum was just off of Mystic River and about to co-star in two epics, Kate Beckinsale had had a minor hit with Underworld and was chasing it with another supernatural flick before co-starring in Martin Scorsese's The Aviator.
collective Oscar noms before this cover: 10 nominations (40% of those for Julianne) and 3 winners (her front cover co-stars Connelly & Paltrow and then Swank in the backfold)
collective Oscar noms after this cover: only one but she won (Hilary Swank)
fame levels in 2009, according to famousr, from most to least: Jennifer Aniston, Gwyneth Paltrow, Hilary Swank, Kirsten Dunst, Scarlett Johansson, Lucy Liu, Salma Hayek, Julianne Moore, Naomi Watts, Jennifer Connelly, Diane Lane, Maggie Gyllenhaal and Alison Lohman
previous episodes of 'VFH': 1995 ,1996, 1997, 1998, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004 and 2005.
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Viva Italia (and Hugh Jackman)

I was all set to complain that we didn't get Hugh Jackman on the US cover of Vanity Fair. Then I remembered that they just gave us Amy Adams and Kate Winslet as pin-up girls instead so...


It feels churlish to complain somehow. But still...

On the cover of 2009's "Vanity Fair's Hollywood" can we just get The Drover in Scarlett Johansson's 2006 pose --maybe his trainer could play the Keira part? (I'll be Tom Ford) Or maybe let Hugh could recreate that Burt Reynolds Cosmo spread? Or Demi Moore's birthday suit cover? Let Baz Luhrmann photograph him because our favorite silver fox auteur likes to fawn over Hugh's sweaty musculature already. Speaking of: Go see Australia on Wednesday! Here's my review. I worry about its box office prospects and I think I can speak for everyone when I say that we don't want to wait another 7 years for another Bazmark production. I know we can blame the gap between Moulin Rouge! (2001) and Australia (2008) partially on Oliver Stone and Baz's aborted take on Alexander but it's not like the auteur is speedy to begin with. Give the Luhrmann/Martin team some incentive to move right into the next movie... whatever it may be. I'll even take a return to Alexander... it's not like Stone's was definitive.


P.S. How many rounds could you go in the ring with Jackman?
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