RCL: Icy Linney, Hottie Mirren, Canadian Ryan

I couldn't sense excitement out there for my weekly random celeb lineup posts but, all the same, I have to commemorate the Tonys one last time since they were practically Golden Globe-esque last night with the TV & Film stars.

<-- Exclusive Unretouched Photo!
Tonyless veteran Laura Linney congratulates newbie ScarJo on her Tony win. [Apparently Scarlett has never seen Mystic River or The House of Mirth. Ice cold blood puts the rose in those dimpled cheeks. Beware.]

I do want to say though, just as a corrective for what I'm seeing on the web, that The Lovely Laura Linney and Viola Davis don't fit the 'screen stars slumming it inbetween jobs' group situation that Tony voters love but stage aficionados rage against. Viola and Laura are both bonafide stage troupers. They've been doing it for years and if the movie roles ever dried up, it's likely that they'd be perfectly content to hit the boards full time. Linney, by her own admission, prefers it to screens big or small. It's just lucky for us that she can adjust her scale to fit any medium. That's not something just any actor can do. Many have tried but few are as adept at all three as she.

So let's get to dresses...

Best Dressed!

I'm not trying to be cheeky putting the original Wicked stars Kristin Chenoweth & Idina Menzel together in best dressed, I just think they deserve it. Cheno looks great in white and can work a micro dress with the best, even somehow managing non obscene pratfalls in them. Speaking of obscenity: Imagine how much Wicked could charge for tickets if Cheno & Idina were to return however briefly after their post-Wicked fame? Idina, of the less flashy personality, makes up for it with this intricate dress. I hope they took a photo together last night, but I haven't seen it if they did.

Update: They did and here it is (Thanks Emma!)

♪ ♫ It well may be
That we will never meet again
In this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me
Is made of what I learned from you
You'll be with me
Like a handprint on my heart
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have re-written mine
By being my friend... ♪

And let's hear it for two women who have decaying portraits hidden in attics on their estates: Bernadette Peters, 62, who stepped out of some greco-roman sculpture garden complete with curls, and Dame Hotness, 64, in a super flattering dark blue scooped neck gown.

One of the best moments last night was when Mirren shouted out to the people "in the gods". I had somehow never heard this expression before but it's apparently a reference to the balcony (i.e. the cheap seats).

Not So Much

I understand that Jada Pinkett Smith is a relatively fierce woman... but divatude aside, do you really wanna risk comparison to that icy hotness of one Vera Farmiga on Oscar night of all things. It's the same dress in the same color family but chopped in half for a woman who's 7 inches shorter and needs to show leg for the illusion of length. I think Blanchett is auditioning in character as DAZZLER for the next X-Men film. (Yes I made that up. Marvel still has some B list characters left before they get to Alison Blaire.) Sherie Rene Scott seemed to forget that when movie stars are invading your domain you have to pick it up a notch. I mean this is pretty but it's awfully casual when you're celebrating a personal success like Everyday Rapture at an awards show. And finally whenever I look at ScarJo's gown -- which I want desperately to like -- I hear Heidi Klum saying "It looks cheap, no?" Maybe it's the color that's making me think of a glittery dress that some young Vice President of Marketing might wear to her corporate Christmas partay.

You know Cate was all like...

'I have lots of gold but not this kind. Gimme.'

I should note that men were also walking the red carpet last night including 'Canadian Who Lives With Me' and 'That Man That's a Movie Star That I Get To Sleep With Every Night.' It's been nearly 24 hours since the Tonys and I'm still reeling at all the new ways the actresses have found to say "my husband" at awards shows. I only wish we could have heard Helen Mirren's new way of describing Taylor Hackford.

Ricky Martin, who no longer needs any euphemisms, was also present.

Ricky & The Canadian That Lives With Scarlett Johansson

Last night was ... odd.
Helen Mirren, Scarlett Johansson, Cate Blanchett, RYAN REYNOLDS

Women on the Verge of a Hyperbolic Breakdown

At the annual "Women in Film Awards" which took place a week ago today, they give awards to movies that nobody has seen yet. Australia's cinematographer Mandy Walker was honored with the "Kodak Vision Award". The Women (2008 remake) was honored. It's like that stupid MTV 'best summer movie' prize. Why not just call it "best hype!". Other honorees: Sherry Lansing, Jeffrey Katzenberg, Sydney Pollack, and Salma Hayek. Finally, Ginnifer Goodwin (yay!) won "Face of the Future" accompanied by Chris Klein who looks a little drunk in this photo (I'm just sayin').

Speaking of drunk I'm not saying Jada Pinkett Smith is drunk at this event's press rounds featuring The Women (2008 remake) but if she's not tossing a few back she's definitely tossing a few out... adjectives and blurb whore quotes that is. Debra Messing is "insanely funny", The Bening is "outrageous" the entire cast is "very specific".


Hmmm... that last one probably won't go on posters, Jada. But to be fair, Debra Messing has more trouble going the earnest route for her sound byte.
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We Can't Wait #14 The Women

Directed by Diane English (Murphy Brown) her feature debut
Starring The Bening (excuse me, who else matters?)
Synopsis A married woman, her husbands mistress, and their catty group of friends get into it
Brought to you by Picturehouse + years and years of development (i.e. casting rumors for decades)
Expected Release Date October 16th, 2008

Nathaniel: Rome wasn't built in a day. Neither was the remake of this classic 30s melodramedy (word?) which has been on Hollywood's "to do" list for at least ten years. Wasn't it going to be Meg Ryan vs. Julia Roberts in the mid 90s? The original film was a hilarious rewatchable chatfest among a group of women including a betrayed wife (Norma Shearer -yes!) and the vamp stealing her husband away (Joan Crawford -"boo hiss" in the good way) and their various friends and frenemies. The big cast was a "who's who" of 1930s cinema, women only! If you need a modern comparison you'll have to think of the very retro French musical comedy 8 Women by François Ozon. Will the remake spoil the fun by throwing a man or two in front of the camera? Let's hope not.


Norma Shearer = Meg Ryan
Rosalind Russell = Annette Bening
Joan Crawford = Eva Mendes
Paulette Godard =Jada Pinkett-Smith
Mary Boland = Bette Midler
Phyllis Povah = Debra Messing
Florence Nash = Carrie Fisher
Joan Fontaine, Marjorie Main, Ruth Hussey = somebody somebody and somebody, maybe Cloris Leachman, Candice Bergen, and Debi Mazar?

The list goes on. I just threw up a little from all the blasphemy. And then got excited again from the actressing. HELP ME!

Gabriel: I watched the original again the other day -- it seems to be on Turner Classic Movies every weekend (must be very popular) -- and was struck by three major thoughts regarding the remake (which I'm very excited about). First was the matchup you didn't list among your original-to-now comparisons, the directors: George Cukor = Diane English. Cukor was a living legend and one of the art form's best; English has never directed in Hollywood, and is best known for a long-dead sitcom (Murphy Brown). While that's not to say that she can't do this piece, it makes me nervous... especially when you consider the screen-time balancing act that Cukor pulled off.

The second thought: the original hinges upon the luminous freshness of Norma Shearer, who in my opinion makes the entire piece work by covering fragile plot points with bravura acting. Can Meg Ryan do to the same? Has she ever been that kind of actress in the first place? (And does anyone still think of her as a big star? I don't see even a moderate hit on her resume since Kate and Leopold seven years ago, and she had Hugh Jackman doing the heavy lifting for her there.)


My last thought: it's a little dated. I'm not saying vicious divorces don't happen in 2008, or that circles of friends don't still sometimes turn into circular firing squads. But as dramatic fodder, the idea of women clawing nastily and fighting over their philandering husbands hasn't been a part of mainstream entertainment since Dynasty, and even then it was barely-concealed camp and soap opera. Can The Women make divorce fun again?

Joe: Box-office-wise, I agree with Gabriel that this is going to be a tough sell, but I'm holding out hope that Meg Ryan still has that orgasm-faking stuff when it comes to comedy. In truth, my reservations for this film have reservations, I'm that concerned. The cast seems like such a hodgepodge -- I love the colorblind casting but wish it wasn't Eva Mendes and Jada Pinkett-Xenu specifically. I've seen nothing out of them in their careers that suggests they can pull this kind of comedy off. Weirdly, besides Annette Bening and Bette Midler (who is all but guaranteed a "Best Performance By A Drag Queen" nomination next year), the one person who I think fits the material best is Debra Messing. I wish Diane English well, but I can more easily see this becoming a disaster than a success.

MaryAnn: Oh, god, this is more on my "dreading" list than my "psyched for" one. Debra Messing *and* Meg Ryan in the same movie? Just shoot me now.

Nathaniel: The Bening is not enough to compensate? The Bening will not be pleased to hear this.

MaryAnn: I love the Bening, and I actually think Mendes has a lot of talent and charisma that has not been fully tapped yet. But Messing is like chalk on a board to me.

Glenn: I'm more excited for The Women BECAUSE it seems like such a high-wire act. That cast IS a hodgepodge (although any chance to see Jada Pinkett-Smith and Debi Mazar on screen, I'll take), the director IS untested and so on. I, unlike the rest of you guys it seems, have not seen the original film that this is based on - cry for me, Argentina, it's not out on DVD here - but the prospect of this movie succeeding is enough to make me excited than the more likely notion that it will fail.

Nathaniel: Divided opinions about its ticket-selling potential and the cast.

This one's for the readers: Do you consider this blasphemy? And if so are you just anti-remake in general? Have you obeyed any of my many demands that you watch the original? And if not, what do I have to do to make you fall for the great Norma Shearer, the First Lady of MGM?

the countdown
#4 Milk / #5 Blindness / # 6 Doubt / #7 The Curious Case of Benjamin Button / #8 Revolutionary Road / #9 The Dark Knight / #10 Sex & The City: The Movie / #11 The Lovely Bones / #12 Wall-E / #13 Stop-Loss / #14 The Women / #15 Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince / Introduction / Orphans
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Vanity Fair's Hollywood ~Episode 3 (1997)

Playing the Hollywood Historian...

The third year of "Vanity Fair's Hollywood" led us to believe that they'd be alternating the all girl / all boy lineups forever. They'd soon disrupt the formula but it was back to a 10 girl lineup for 97. This time they were christened "The Next Wave" At the time I wasn't terribly wild about this cover. It's hard to remember why but every year when the cover premieres you have someone in particular that you feel is overlooked. I should have written it down. Now...who knows who was snubbed? 1997 isn't that clear. Looking back, though, it's the first cover that really coheres. Isn't this a beautiful color palette? Plus, nobody is pulling too much focus from anyone else either, or dressed in such a way that they don't quite fit (Hello Gwyneth Paltrow in 1995).


The collaborating cover girls were...

Cameron Diaz, who heading towards 25, still had residual heat from her successful debut in The Mask (1994) with Jim Carrey. Subsequent films hadn't achieved any impact but My Best Friend's Wedding was about to open. People were stunned that she dared a charisma-off with Julia Roberts and even more dazzled that that blinding Julia star wattage didn't burn the young upstart to a crisp on the spot. Instead it lit her up and onto the A list. Heady days of worshipful Golden Globe nominations, audience pleasing rump-shaking (Charlie's Angels) and endless Justin Timberlake carousing were just ahead. But doesn't it seem like things have gotten awfully quiet since 2002? She's only 35... where's the second act surge?

Kate Winslet was already going places at 22. She had revealed to us the brilliance of Peter Jackson (casting this particular unknown in Heavenly Creatures was his first masterstroke, don't you think?) and was the only Oscar nominee on the cover (Sense & Sensibility). You'll notice that she also had red hair. Which means, Titanic was filming. That's probably all you need to know about what happened next. Although I think it bears repeating (after the discussion of the peaks and valleys of one Ms. Kidman) that people tend to forget the valleys in tremendous careers. Nobody would ever admit to this now but there were people back in the day that felt her choice to do Hideous Kinky after Titanic was a "career killer", that she was too fat for Hollywood, etcetera. People have always been trying to tear great actresses down, particularly when they've embraced acting above the demands of being a sex symbol.

Claire Danes specialized in making me cry like a baby in the 90s. She was turning 18 here and she had already jerked my tears around in My So Called Life, Little Women, To Gillian on Her 37th Birthday and Romeo + Juliet. To virtually anyone paying attention she looked like the next big thing. Ten years later the fame persists but the career is disappointing. Mileage may vary but I think there are two problems. 1) Choice of roles. 2) She hasn't rid herself of those formerly endearing fidgety mannerisms (and nearing 30, they're distracting. Maybe it's just me but I want to see a mature actress emerge from the memories of the A list teenager.

Renée Zellweger -that's right I said the name. We're time travelling remember? This was long before she became one of my arch enemies... She Who Must Not Be Named. She was but 28 and had won many hearts and probably came thisclose to her first Oscar nomination just months before, having "completed" Tom Cruise's Jerry Maguire (1996). Previously she had also starred in The Whole Wide World (1996) and was one of several rising stars to be seen in the very funny 70s high school comedy Dazed and Confused (1993). Major stardom followed and strange things eventually began to happen... A couple of quiet years may have sufficiently doused the raging backlash that was occurring but can she regain control over those calcified mannerisms? Let's hope she's Bridget Jones squinty and not Miss Potter squinched in Leatherheads with George Clooney. (That's right, I'm calling truce. Win me back Renée... or at least don't get in the The Clooney's way. I love him best in comedies.)

Alison Elliott, 27, might be the lone member of this cover you didn't recognize. 1997 remains her biggest year. She was fresh off the Sundance surprise The Spitfire Grill (1996) but it underperformed once regular audiences got a hold of it. Later in 1997 she was in fine form as Helena Bonham-Carter's kind rival in The Wings of the Dove. Some critics called for an Oscar nomination. That didn't pan out and very strangely, Wings of the Dove was her last high profile film role.

Minnie Driver, 27 and reclining awkwardly on one elbow--Ouch Minnie-- was about to win Matt Damon's troubled heart both onscreen and off Good Will Hunting --though it'd shortly be off off. She won an Oscar nomination for her efforts as 'the girl'. At the time of this cover she was surfing good buzz from her performance in Circle of Friends. Lately she's been singing and starring on the critically acclaimed The Riches on TV.

Jada Pinkett was not yet Jada Pinkett Smith at 25 but almost. Will Smith and she made it official at the tail end of this very year. Her acting career had taken off round about 1993 with the one two punch of Menace II Society and her recurring role on television's A Different World. The previous year had been a big one for her in the movies, arguably her peak, starring in The Nutty Professor and Set it Off with Queen Latifah and this year she was in the first kill position (hi Drew Barrymore!) in Scream 2. You'll mostly see her in supporting roles these days and on the red carpet, usually in stunning metallic colors.

Jennifer Lopez was nearing 28 and Selena and Anaconda were opening, making her an instant star. She had famously been paid 1 million for Selena making her the best paid Latina actress ever at the time (if I recall correctly). She was on her way to mega stardom and becoming so famous you only needed two syllables ~ "JLo" Next up: Out of Sight (1998) which remains her best performance by so wide a margin one wishes Steven Soderbergh would cast her again.

Charlize Theron was only 21. My god, that seems like it must have been 10 years ago. oh... um... She had made a big splash in Two Days in the Valley (1996). The film wasn' t a big hit but people were really talking about her. Mostly about her hotness. It was very Jessica Alba a few years ago. Theron proved her acting chops were on par with her beauty, quickly surprising people with her intensity and believability in the otherwise ludicrous The Devil's Advocate which came out in the fall of '97. She is one of only two eventual Oscar winners (thus far) on this cover --the other being She Who Must Not Be Named. Coincidentally, they both won on the same night in 2004, seven years after this cover shoot saw the light of day --the next wave, indeed.

Fairuza Balk -had been a child actor in Return to Oz (1985) and showed a lot of maturing promise in the under seen indie Gas, Food, Lodging (1992) but was still transitioning to adult roles at 23. The year previous she had been an overcooked hoot as a witch in The Craft (still what she's most remembered for) and she would soon co-star in American History X (1998) with Ed Norton. She's been effective in some notable films or roles like Almost Famous (2000) and Personal Velocity (2002) but stardom didn't really materialize save for devoted cult pockets and she isn't in many pictures these days.

median age: 24, youngest: Claire. oldest: Renée
collective Oscar nominations before this cover: Just 1... Kate Winslet in Sense & Sensibility
collective Oscar nominations after this cover: 10 nominations with 2 wins: Charlize's Monster and Renée on Cold Mountain
fame levels in 2007, according to famousr, from most to least: Cameron Diaz, Charlize Theron, Jada Pinkett Smith, Claire Danes, Minnie Driver, Fairuza Balk and Alison Elliott. * famousr proved very unreliable this time around. No listings for Kate, Jennifer or Renée. That's some major snubbage there given the household name status.
see also: 1995 ,1996, 1997, 1998, 1999, 2000 and 2001
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