Houston, St. Louis & Florida Name Their Favorites

I'm just going to keep using this one photo I concocted below until people stop with the Hailee Steinfeld is a supporting actress in True Grit meme. I've even seen her so labelled IN REVIEWS that have nothing to do with Oscars. Oscar culture has truly distorted all concepts of narrative in our modern society. I realize that I'm the lone ornery voice of dissent but, so what? I'm demonstrating my own true grit; Hailee would be proud of me... well, except for the part where I wouldn't nominate her.

But, the ageism and sexism of movie awards is really getting to me this year, sorry.

Mattie Ross (Hailee Steinfeld), the captain of True Grit's ship.

Fact: No teenage boy who was leading a picture like True Grit (just imagine the gender reversed) would ever win any awards beyond "breakthrough." Remember when Leonardo DiCaprio won all those statues for his wildly acclaimed "supporting" work in This Boy's Life (1993) and Jesse Bradford won all those awards for King of the Hill (1993)  and Christian Bale won those same prizes for his debut "supporting" work in Empire of the Sun (1987) and Max Records won them for supporting all of those Wild Things Whereever They Were last year and remember when...

No, neither do I.

Pretend Hailee was a boy and imagine her chances competing against Bale or Rush. HA! Like that would ever happen. People respect veteran actors too much to take their trophies away from them. But put a young girl up against a veteran actress and the veteran actresses are toast. They get no respect.

Anyway... if you wanna discuss what Texas, Missouri and Florida critics are honoring, keep on readin'.

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Whip It Real Good

Whip It is based on a novel about a young girl who joins the roller derby.
Whip It is not based on the classic Devo tune. But still...♫ "Whip It good!"

Girl Fight! Don't worry. Drew even uses herself as comic punching bag

For her fictional novel turned movie, writer Shauna Cross drew from her own experiences as derby girl "Maggie Mayhem" and imagined what it would have been like to discover this alternative grrrl world as a young woman. So Whip It introduces us to Bliss Cavendar (Ellen Page), a sad eyed highschooler who is eager to get out of BoDeen Texas and into the big city. In this particular case that's Austin, Texas, which just happens to be the spot where roller derby resurrected itself a decade ago. Bliss doesn't share her mom's (Marcia Gay Harden) tenacious dream of beauty pageants. She doesn't even exactly share her best friend's (Alia Shawkat) college plans. Bliss is basically a dreamer without a dream, until a serendipitous sighting of derby girls passing out homemade competition flyers sparks a fire inside of her.

Bliss hungrily learns everything about this new world of self-made skating "stars" like Maggie Mayhem (Kristen Wiig), Smashley Simpson (Drew Barrymore) and undefeated derby champ Iron Maven (Juliette Lewis). With their oversized personalities and theatrical names, it's rather easy to view all of this as an elaborate drag competition on skates...

Read the rest of my review at Towleroad
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Deep in the Heart of Texas Critics

Perhaps you've noticed that I haven't posted the results of several film critics awards the second they've come in. It's because there are too many. But I finalized info on my Oscar pages this morning. Texas was the latest thorn in my side. I ask the following in all sincerity: Are there really enough film critics working in the State of Texas to justify three separate critics organizations: Dallas/Fort Worth, Austin and Houston each with their own? Should all these laid off film critics you keep hearing about be relocating to the Lone Star State?

What's worse is that these three Texan entities don't have different aesthetics. Oh sure there are disagreements in Best Picture: Dallas (Slumdog), Houston (Benjamin Button), Austin (The Dark Knight). Yet all three of them agree on Heath Ledger as Supporting Actor (The Dark Knight) and Anne Hathaway as Best Actress (Rachel Getting Married). In other categories they have 2/3 agreement. Why not just form one Supersize Texas Association of Critics (STAC) or somesuch? Wouldn't their opinions have slightly more weight that way?

Here in NYC, the publishing capital, we only have 2 film critics organizations that claim a "place" in their title (NYFCC and NYFCO). If in New York, where you can't throw a bagel without hitting a critic, we can only justify 2...

I'm glad New York keeps it simple. Could you imagine? The Bronx Film Critics Association (BFCA -wait that acronym is in use), the Greater Association of Long Island Critics (GALIC), The Upper West Side Film Critics Association (UWSFCA). The Upper West Side Film Critics Association Online (UWSFCAO) Staten Island Critics Circle Organization (SICCO), Washington Heights Hispanic Association of Critics (WHHAC), East Village Association of Critics (EVAC). I mean where does it end? Central Harlem Online Independent Critics Everlasting (CHOICE), Freelancers Union Critics Kircle (FUCK). Exactly!

Madness.

Do you think Houston thinks they can kick Dallas/Ft. Worth's ass? You know Austin thinks itself a total hipster and above the fray. Which it kinda is... but still. It's not like Austin's choices truly rocked the fringes. For that you have to go to Toronto -- Wendy & Lucy as Best Pic. Rachel Getting Married in three categories... Woot!

And while we're filling in the blanks, there's also Phoenix which honored Benjamin Button and Las Vegas which went with Frost/Nixon and not just in Best Picture. All over the place it won. That's its first (and probably last) win for Best Picture. But at least it ain't Frontrunner Millionaire. On a more humorous note, despite the Slumdog SAG ensemble nomination (grrr - a prize for the casting directors ability to find cute children?) the cast is still unknown to many. Over @ MovieWeb for example, they think the great male actor Irffan Khan is actually the pretty if blank female star Freida Pinto and they also think that Frieda Pinto is Frieda Pinto while she is simultaneously Mia Drake. Oops.

In other news... Utah joins Austin in lauding The Dark Knight as Best Picture (with Rachel Getting Married as runner up? Interesting if inconsequential... it's really too bad Rachel has been faring so poorly outside of Anne Hathaway. But history will be kind to it long past the Frost/Nixons). They give director to Pixar's Andrew Stanton for WALL•E. They went totally populist.


updated Oscar pages
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Austin Critics Ask Ellen Page To Have Their Babies

Few more critics awards for you...

Austin I wasn't going to do the smaller cities this year (I don't understand why there is more than one critics association in Texas?) but Austin deserves notice because they were the only group that dared to think outside of the box last year, denying Helen Mirren (The Queen) a clean sweep of all 2,171 Best Actress prizes on the planet. Instead they gave their award to Ellen Page in Hard Candy. Guess what? They'll have seconds. Page it is... again. Are they wooing the starlet to relocate to sunny Texas?

Picture There Will Be Blood
Director P.T. Anderson There Will Be Blood
Actress Ellen Page Juno her second consecutive win with Austin. What's she making next year?
Actor Daniel Day-Lewis There Will Be Blood
Supporting Actress Allison Janney, Juno
Joe and I were discussing her last night. Joe described her as "suspended in a vat of awesome" heh. I didn't quite catch Juno fever myself but I loved Janney in it. I've started using her hilarious phrases at home -- "East Jesus Nowhere" being my current favorite.
Supporting Actor Javier Bardem No Country For Old Men
Foreign Language Film Black Book
Animated Feature Ratatouille
Canadian Film Away From Her
Documentary No End in Sight What no Sicko which gave Canada props for its humane health care program?
Best First Feature Ben Affleck for Gone Baby Gone
"Fact" that most of us did not know until the critics organizations taught us: Ben Affleck and Sarah Polley were the only first time filmmakers allowed behind cameras this year. That they both just happen to be famous actors is entirely coincidental!!!
Breakthrough Michael Cera Superbad and Juno
Screenplay, Adapted The Coen Bros No Country For Old Men
Screenplay, Original Diablo Cody Juno
The only two screenplays written this year. All other films were improvised. Hadn't you heard?
Cinematography and Score There Will Be Blood
Austin Film Award Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rodriguez Grindhouse

Toronto. I've only been there twice but I love the city and the people were so friendly and the film festival is so good. Oh, Toronto... I've missed you these past few years. Their "best" this year?

Picture No Country For Old Men
Director The Coen Bros No Country For Old Men
Actress (tie) Julie Christie Away From Her and Ellen Page Juno
Toronto's film critics, torn between hometown pride for Away From Her and love for Canadian sprite Ellen Page, threw up their hands and went with both. Oh Canada, you sentimental thing!
Actor Viggo Mortensen Eastern Promises
Another Canadian advantage... he stars in a David Cronenberg film. Not that he isn't deserving. If Austin gets Ellen Page can I have Viggo Mortensen?
Supporting Actress Cate Blanchett, I'm Not There
Supporting Actor Javier Bardem No Country For Old Men
Foreign Language Film 4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days
Animated Feature Ratatouille
Screenplay The Coen Bros No Country For Old Men
Documentary No End in Sight
What no Sicko which gave Canada props?

Best First Feature Sarah Polley for Away From Her
Canadian Film Away From Her
I'm so proud of her. It's like I'm Canada

I basically don't have to even type these posts up anymore. Copy and paste. "Groupthink does have its advantages," he says with a sigh. The gross thing that I didn't mention? Somehow Phillip Seymour Hoffman was in the running for supporting (a runner up) for Charlie Wilson's War. While it's true that I am not a fan I'm not blind when he does deserve accolades. He was great in Magnolia and Capote both. I can see why people like the work in Before the Devil... and The Savages but Charlie Wilson's War? Beyond the look-at-me screaming and cracking of jokes, what is going on in that performance? I wouldn't care, supporting actor being traditionally the least interesting Oscar acting race, but for the great people who'll be snubbed to give him a spot this year for totally serviceable but unremarkable work.

There's also the London Film Critics Association Nominations to peruse if you're so inclined --they're the first to give Zodiac or Laura Linney in the The Savages any love. Good on them. The Phoenix Film Critics also spoke but it's a virtual repeat of almost every other group so only click over if you're absolutely desperate to see what's hot in the (602).

Tilda Swinton and Texas ???

...strange bedfellows but god bless. Someone finally gave the alien acting goddess a prize for her inspired work in Michael Clayton and that someone was the Dallas/Ft Worth Film Critics. Never have I been so proud of Texas.

The Southeastern Film Critics Association also spoke up today, slathering themselves with the sweet lotion of conformity: Bardem, Ryan, No Country... all zee usual suspects.

In other awardage news those HFPA apostates over at the Golden Satellites gave prizes to a whole slew of people who were willing to show up. Nah, I shan't be mean. Some good choices there: Viggo, Tom Wilkinson, etcetera... But here's what I don't get. If you're going to separate drama from comedy as the Globes also do, why would you name the supporting category "Best Supporting in a Drama"? if you aren't going to have a comedy counterpart just call it "Supporting" like the Globes do... otherwise it looks like you're saying "you comic supporting players suck! No category for you" Either that or you're just saying "our website sucks. we forget to include all the categories" I also think its lame that all these groups let themselves have six nominees in every category when they already have more categories. What is this, the Saturn Awards? The BFCAs? The Tonys? The Academy is like a model of restraint and sober tough love in comparison.