White Trash Cameo Hameos Forever!

Since America proved tonight at the polls (yay democracy!) that we are all just one tiny step away from being uneducated white trash who vote against our own interests and functioning society -- seriously if there's no government, who will pick up the garbage, who will protect us if someone breaks into our homes, who will make sure our children aren't as idiotic as we are? --  I thought this might be an appropriate way to "celebrate"!

White Trash Cameos!

God bless Catherine at the Guardian for the word "hameo". Maybe she didn't invent the word (?) but I was unfamiliar and I will now use for-e-ver.

The article is inspired by the hot mess bliss of Juliette Lewis in Conviction and features a spot on appraisal of what Ms Lewis does for and to the film (I'm sorry my article on Lewis is so delayed). Catherine surveys memorable "hameos" and then asks readers for theirs. You must read the comments section. It's joy upon joy upon joy... a veritable stack of blueberry pancakes smothered in syrup (the hefty portions of bacon on the side are a given).

Weirdly Catherine cites Keanu Reeves in The Gift (which, if you've never seen it is like THE perfect embodiment of "erratically acted movie") as an, uh, problem. My favorite so-terrible-maybe-it's-good? performance in that 'Cate Blanchett is Totally Psychic!' movie actually belongs to none other than Hilary Swank (the defacto star of the movie that Lewis is currently stealing away).

In The Gift Swank plays, you guessed it, Poor White Trash. But she's doing it with this absurdly tinny/squeaky little girl voice. To this day, I can hear her bizarre line reading of "I was thinking baaaad thoughts." It's literally the only thing I remember from the movie. That and Katie Holmes's  Demi-Moore-like breast baring, which is to say: she got those babies out emphatically, as if her career depended on it.

What is it about playing white trash that makes actors go so bonkers? They always become cartoons.

"People heare bout what yer doin' and they laugh at yyyeeeewwww"

I'm going to DisneyLand!
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Julia's Men: Broken Billy and Brother Eric

A steep box office drop off for Eat Pray Love (which opened well thanks to Julia Roberts and the memoir's popularity) or its generally blah reviews could easily kill it, but Richard Jenkins has a slam dunk Best Supporting Actor Type part, don't you think? Yeah, you know that category has its types.

For me though, the character I keep thinking about is Stephen (Billy Crudup). Crudup made a vivid impression in just a couple of scenes so I wrote him up for my "Best in Show" column at Tribeca Film. He's like a little boy whose heart Julia stomped on till it broke. So sad.

I have to start my spreadsheets for the 2010 Film Bitch Awards now lest I forget something (I've usually started them by now. Eeep). Are than any cameos or limited roles this year that wowed you that you want everyone else to love? If so, share them in the comments. (Here's who I went with last year in those "limited" categories.)

Speaking of men Julia Roberts may or may not have clobbered emotionally, apparently Eric (her older brother) and she have mended their previously tense relationship. The Daily Beast has an interview with Eric Roberts about his career and their relationship. Like his friend Mickey Rourke he isn't one to mince words and I love that in celebrities even if their handlers do not. He just flat out admits that he gave up chasing a certain kind of career after his Oscar loss.

When you hand in great performances in Star 80 and Runaway Train and the Oscar goes to Don Ameche, it kind of bums you out.

Brutal honesty plus shameless self regard. Love it! (To be fair he is just fantastic in Star 80 and should be proud of himself.) I also get bummed out about the Cocoon love. But if anyone but Ameche was going to win that particular Oscar, it would have been Klaus Maria Brandauer in Out of Africa.
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Heroics and Dastardly Deeds, Circa 2009

I should be finished wrapping up the unfortunately delayed FiLM BiTCH Awards for 2009 in the next few days. (This past spring roughed me up... ouch. Coming back to life now). But while I knock off the rest of the categories backstage enjoy the finalized nominations for Best Cameos/Limited Roles (with gold medals for Carrie Preston and Robert Duvall) and Best Hero, Best Villain.


Which do-gooder would you call on if you needed rescue and which villains do you most love to hate?

Only Got One Scene? Make it Count!

update: I did some tinkering here. Messed up on my awards spreadsheet. Oops

I used to really love giving prizes for limited or cameo roles and I used to fantasize that one day some struggling actor would write me an email saying "i can't believe someone noticed what I was doing in that scene! ur my new BFF" and whatnot. But this bizarre fantasy never became reality and now I find that my awards for limited and cameo roles only torture me by reminding me of the major studio's continual campaign tricks between lead and supporting roles with Oscars. Having a third category makes things yet more confusing still! For instance, are all those female roles in Rachel Getting Married supporting characters or limited roles? Of course if you have one you have the other which makes it infinitely more confusing.

Exactly what is a limited role? I guess I'm masochistic like that to even ask. But I like to recognize the lesser known actors, the blue collar faces of cinema if you will, when they make an impression or lift a scene in some noticeable way. So here's to them

Best Line Readings, Best Limited / Cameo Performances
Starring people from Savage Grace, The Reader, Valkyrie, Reprise, Iron Man and more

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Good Things in Small Packages

Some wonderful things that come in tiny packages:

cupcakes, old fashioned letters, gifts, reese's peanut butter cups, glitter, gift certificates, fortunes, mp3s, rings, cream filling, Kristin Chenowith, eyeshadow, matches, pills, kittens...

And something else, too: performances. There are no small parts. I'm thinking of this today because my friend Tom told me about a spill Lena Olin took at a Variety screening of The Reader recently. She was descending the insanely steep steps of the Sunshine Cinema in huge heels. He describes

As she was about half way down, Lena stumbled... she was only saved from a serious fall by running smack into Ralph Fiennes's back (his strong, silent, brooding back). She was clearly startled and embarrassed...and probably saw her whole life flash before her eyes...plummeting to her death at the Sunshine Cinemas. How pathetic would that have been...to die for a Q&A? And where was Sydney Bristow when we needed her?

Seriously steep steps @ Sunshine (selling point: the seating for screenings is superb) sssssssssss

Anyway... Lena has a terrifically brittle scene very late in The Reader... which got me to thinking? Which are your favorite very brief acting turns this year? One scene or frequently appearing but totally backgrounded wonders. People you could technically lift out of the movies and still have a movie (I'm not talking about the Viola Davises in Doubt here since that whole movie requires her lynchpin scene to work.). Yes, I'm looking for FYC ideas for my "Best Performances in a Cameo or Limited Role" (last year's nominees if you need a refresher) at the ninth annual FiLM BiTCH Awards which begin in but 3 weeks time.
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