My Spider Links Are Tingling

Playbill Julie Andrews and Dolly Parton are both getting special Grammys this year.
Pixar Blog another FYC ad for Toy Story 3 as Titanic. Hmmm. I gotta say, I am not sure about the taste level on this one. What'cha think?
BBC Anne Hathaway discusses that Judy Garland biopic. There's some hesistancy about the singing. Here's a clue. If you can sing as well as Anne Hathaway (very well) star in a musical, not a biopic with one of the most famous voices of all time that you won't be able to replicate. Argh.
Old Hollywood, my favorite tumblr, gives a rooftop view of the filming of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde (1931).
IndieWire The Year of the Actress. 60 Women FYC.

Off Cinema
THR whoa. Broadway stars are on the attack after injuries on that Spider Man set. But wait there's more...
AV Club heated meetings and cancellations follow latest injury.
Wet Asphalt on "slipstream" and the continuum between genre fiction and mainstream fiction. I'm linking up to this because I read my first China Miéville novel earlier this year and am still... uncertain... about it.
Playbill HBO will film Pee-Wee Herman's current Broadway show for broadcast.
BlogStage actress audition alert: wanna be Kathleen Turner's understudy?

Anne Hathaway, 'Next' Cover Girl

This is a gay rag here in NYC. Anne was on the holiday weekend cover promoting Love and Other Drugs, and though the inside article is dependably slim, she once again proves herself not just a wonderful celeb but a cool person and major friend of the gays.

"I was at the Empire State Pride Agenda dinner a few years ago," she recalls. "And Margaret Cho put it perfectly. She said, 'I can't believe we're still dealing with this shit!'" If a class act like Hathaway is cursing, you know she means business.

Love her. How beautiful are these photos by twin photographers The Riker Brothers?

James & Annie, Good Sports & Oscar Hosts

Saturday Night Live, that dinosaur of pop culture, may be good for something we never really expected: producing Oscar hosts. Both James Franco and Anne Hathaway, just announced as February's Oscar hosts,  have hosted the ancient challenging live comedy program (Franco in 2009, Hathaway just recently) to fine results, so why not Hollywood's High Holy Night? I'm just glad that they didn't take the SNL alum thing to its exhaustively ubiquitous endpoint: Betty White!

Franco & Hathaway have proven themselves as versatile showpeople over the past decade but more importantly for their latest assignment, they're both good industry sports and twinkly showbiz ambassadors. They don't always need the spotlight (witness their frequent onscreen generosity to co-stars) but when it hits them they sure sparkle, they choose a mix of classy projects and check-cashing opportunities (usually a wise career move), and their onscreen personas are buttressed by offscreen personalities that read as amiable, clever and ready for a good time. In short, though they both can be the life of the party, it's just as easy to imagine them hosting one. You can practically see them taping streamers to ceilings or blowing up balloons for a friend's birthday, can't you?

But alas... AMPAS's decision to employ them is problematic. Though Hathaway's Best Actress prospects are on the fade for Love and Other Drugs, most pundits agree that Franco is one of the frontrunners for this Best Actor for 127 Hours. Therefore we can't totally cheer this otherwise sensible decision. The Tony Awards regularly use nominated hosts and The Emmys have been known to double dip, too. But no matter the organization, the event, or the temperament of the celebrity, it's unavoidably T-A-C-K-Y. It's like hosting a party and declaring yourself the Guest of Honor. Who does that?

Related Reading: 
Vulture 5 Weirdest Oscar Hosts
Deadline brags about calling it. "Toldja"
Hollywood Reporter Youngest hosts ever...

Speaking of which, I love this tweet from Indie Focus about the Oscar's weirdly noncommital desperation to be hipper than than are.

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Who Cares About Link?

God bless V Magazine for their latest issue, "Who Cares About Age". Usually when the media decides to celebrate older women, we're only allowed one. Like the recent Streep Mania... or 2006 when Helen Mirren was all the rage. I've always had a thing for actresses of a certain age so I applaud them for multiplying the enthusiasm. I mean check out these legendary cover girls: Jane Fonda, Susan Sarandon, and Sigourney Weaver. yesplease³.

And as if that weren't enough, you've got Charlotte Rampling on the inside! A whole huge photogallery of her... "Charlotte in Couture".

The average age of these women is 66. The average fabulousity of these women is ∞. Just saying.

More links...
Scott Feinberg interviews Halle Berry
The Evening Class Liza Minnelli interviews and TCM schedule
Deadline Hollywood Toy Story Best Picture spoofing FYC ads. The first is to your left. There's more to come as they campaign for the big prize. I'm really hoping they do Amadeus, The Hurt Locker and West Side Story. Which Best Pictures would you like to see spoofed by the toys?
Man About Town interviews Ryan Kwanten... naked. Ha.
Shadowplay proposes a mid December blog-a-thons about the last films from directors. What a fine idea. Any suggestions you'd like me write about?
Just Jared Anne Hathaway is awesome. She's already dreamt up her own role on Glee and picking songs before they've even invited her.
Moviefone If Lindsay Lohan needs to hit rock bottom to recover maybe this will do it? Malin Akerman of all people is now considered a suitable replacement.

offscreen
Gabby's Playhouse brilliant cartoon about the progression of all "sexism" discussions on the internet
The Post-Game Show on "beefcake" comic art and how it differs from cheesecake...

And finally... 
What's your take on Christian Bale's Oscar chances for The Fighter?

I was discussing this with some peers earlier today. Some people feel he's too disliked to win an Oscar (after all, many below the line players vote on Oscars and we all know that Bale has a temper on set) others that "likeability" doesn't matter so much in the face of a certain level of performance. Esquire just published a thorny profile piece. Some journalists think he's an ingrate. Others, like Kris Tapley appreciate his rough edges. My take is somewhere in the middle. Likeability does matter in awards season (a lot) and though I appreciate honesty and strong opinions, I do find that it's incredibly narcissistic when stars of a certain level bitch about their duties as stars... like doing press. Basically they wouldn't have those duties if they weren't hugely successful. If people want to talk to you that means you're more successful. All jobs come with elements that are less joyous for the worker ... but very few jobs have the rewards that star actors receive. Bitching about a tiny amount of drudgery within a life filled with extravagant reward (the only reason that tiny amount of drudgery even exists is because you're successful enough to have been extravagantly rewarded) seems very very petty. So I'm torn. I find it distasteful but on the other hand I believe art should be judged without interference from the personality of the artist.

Get Away Fom Ripley You Bitches

JA from MNPP here. If you consider Ridley Scott's 1979 masterpiece Alien a horror film (and you really should consider Ridley Scott's 1979 masterpiece Alien a horror film) (and even more specifically it should be considered it a slasher film, just a slasher set in outer space) then it becomes immediately clear that Ellen Ripley, the character immortalized by Sigourney Weaver in this and its subsequent three sequels, started out as a fairly straightforward Final Girl. She fits in right beside Jamie Lee Curtis in John Carpenter's Halloween and Heather Langencamp in A Nightmare in Elm Street - the smart girl who sees the encroaching horror and manages to outwit outplay and outlast the danger.


Ripley's not really the Action Hero we think of until Jim Cameron's sequel - make that Action heroine, THE Action Heroine; she made and broke and burned the mold up with a flamethrower. And even there Cameron does all sorts of interesting things with the idea of an Action Heroine that so many films today don't bother to even contemplate - Ripley, even when she's kicking ass, is a character that is always painted with as much femininity as possible, on top of her butchness.

When I say "femininity" I don't mean objectifying her as a sexualized, desirable woman (although those moments where Sigourney strips down to those tiny underpants are important, I'd argue, in that they stick that obvious physical facet of her womanhood front and center). Adding in the character of the uber-tough Vasquez in Aliens is a clear attempt to slide Ripley's character to the center of the femme-to-butch scale - she seems so demure and ladylike standing next to Jenette Goldstein in her red bandanna! - but great pains are made over and over again to code Ripley as a mother figure. Her protection of Newt and the introduction of the Alien Queen with her pulsing egg sac as the big villain - it's all a way of designating a space for a specifically feminine sort of rage within a heretofore male dominated film space.

Read more »

Link Robot ♥ Actresses (Especially the Intimidating Leggy Kind)

Shock Till You Drop Sigourney Weaver interview involving all four Aliens movies and her other genre successes. She's a bit cagey in her answers -- see how she dodges the tough question. But it's Sigourney so we read. And...
Collider ...Robert DeNiro has signed on to play the object of her investigation in the psychological thriller Red Lights. He'll be playing a psychic, she's a paranormal activity expert. The role of Weaver's partner is yet to be cast. We hope it's a good chemistry fit.

In Contention Are Macy Gray and Kimberly Elise the standouts from For Colored Girls? We'll need more than just one anonymous source's opinion to find out. Stay tuned.
The Film Doctor 9 notes on I Am Love. I'm not going to read this now (I'm working on an I Am Love piece and want to be free of all influence) but I like these # notes pieces.
Birth of a Notion RIP Barbara Billingsley. She spoke jive.

Pussy Goes Grrr on cinema's love of combining the feminine with the monstrous.

Chuck & Beans "How To Break Bad News To A Movie Geek."
popbytes on the movie-turned-stage-musical Leap of Faith with music by Oscar winner Alan Menken. The musical stars one of our Broadway favorites Raúl Esparza. We hope they recast the female lead. Enough with the stunt casting, producers. Musicals deserve GREAT voices (like Esparzas).

Movie|Line Info regarding Oz: The Great and Powerful from Sam Raimi starring Robert Downey Jr. Boy did the producers of the Wicked musical biff their chance to be first. By the time that musical hits the screen people will be so sick of Oz with all these multiple movies greenlit; if you arrive AFTER the things you've influenced it's kind of problematic and potentially stale. They should have started on the movie the very moment they realized they had a mammoth hit on their hands. Like way the hell back in 2004 they should have been doing the first draft screenplay and searching for the movie cast. It takes years to get a movie on the screen and we could have been enjoying it for Christmas this very year.

 Just Jared Halle Berry presented Chris Nolan with an award at the Scream Awards. (It's a horror awards show.) I can't figure out why Nolan would have been honored but when people love you they will find any excuse. P.S. Berry looks sensational. But you knew that already. Beautiful woman.
I Need My Fix Anne Hathaway on the cover of the new Vogue. But excuse me, why does she look like Eva Mendes instead of Anne Hathaway? I hate it when magazine photo shoot tinkering does that.
Pullquote this is a month-old post on notes taken during a screening of Angelina Jolie's Salt. But it's new to me and it totally amused me. Trust that I can never understand my own notes after a screening.
Comedy Central Gay Robot ♥ Ryan Phillipe. teehee

Part 1: Jake Gyllenhaal at "The New Yorker Festival"

I'll share a few more interesting movie-specific quotes I couldn't find room for in this article tomorrow here at the blog. But for now a piece I wrote for Tribeca Film.

He’d be unrecognizable but for those enormous blue eyes. In fact, when Jake Gyllenhaal walked out on stage at the SVA Theater in Chelsea on Saturday night, a full bushy beard covering what seemed like all of his face, film critic David Denby didn’t even introduce him by name. “I don’t know who this guy is,” Denby joked. “He looked a little lost, so we invited him in.”

But who needs a big introduction when they’ve been headlining movies big and small for a full decade? 

Read the rest @ Tribeca Film

...for thoughts on Jake's acting process, his relationship with Maggie Gyllenhaal and a famous actor he would love to emulate.
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Love... (The Poster)

Gaze upon the great poster for Love and Other Drugs. It's a casually lovely earth-tone -- what with the brown backdrop and lots of flesh -- which is not a palette movie posters regularly embrace. We like it lots. But there are three totally unnecessary or faulty things about this poster...

1. Duh, the pillows.
   
2. the text "& OTHER DRUGS" is superfluous. We only want to LOVE.
3. There's a typo to your far right, bottom hand corner. It reads "NOV. 24" but I'm pretty sure they meant to say "NOW"

As in that's when we want.
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Streep Nom #14: Miranda Priestley Forever

What we have here my friends is multi-tasking on fire!!! It's a tuesday top ten, it's a new episode of Great Moments in Screen Bitchery, it's the latest episode of "Streep at 60" which we're going to wrap up this week (at least in this format). It's all of these things simultaneously.

Ready? "Why is no one reh-dee?"


GIRD YOUR LOINS!

Ten Best Miranda Priestley Line Readings

10 "My flight has been cancelled... "
How incredulous and put out she sounds without even raising her voice. The way she says "school" when referencing her kids recital which she's desperate to attend is giggle worthy, too. So childish. Translation 'How could such a thing happen to the center of the universe... me?'

09 "There you are Emily. How many times do I have to scream your name?"
'Actually my name is Andrea.' Oh shut it Hathaway. She doesn't care. She will call you what she likes and you'll come running. Streep's double sided reaction to this interruption is A+ perfect. She's almost delighted that someone is talking back to her -- the novelty! -- stifling an awkard smile/laugh. But then immediately reasserts control with a list of demands. The silent hanging punchline is so choice "And Emily..."

[Great Moments in Screen Bitchery #211, The Devil Wears Prada]

08 "I agree. No business tonight. Enjoy"
I couldn't include only her bitchiest quips! Thrown by the appearance of her rival Jacqueline, Streep gives us just a peak at Miranda's vulnerability in the gala sequence. Her boss doesn't want to discuss her cryptic reference to a note. She acquiesces by pouring the charm on a little too thickly, a little too needily. Everyone has a boss... even bosses from hell.

07 "And you can do anything... right?"
She wants the Harry Potter unpublished manuscript for her twin daughters. Normally Miranda's bitchy lobs are masked as power displays or excusable from a certain kind of 'Do your job' angle. But this time she's pissed. This one is a direct and purposefully impossible challenge. It's a gauntlet thrown down. For once she doesn't pretend otherwise.


06 "The truth is there is no one who can do what I do."
This line is uttered in the middle of her final monologue in which she is both rationalizing her own actions and chastising Andie on her holier than thou perch. The line is true enough of the character. But it's also not directed at the woman she's speaking too but to herself. It's a pep talk for a narrow escape from the competitors nipping at her heels.

And yes, the line is also true enough of the actress.

05 "You have no sense of style or fashion... No, no. That wasn't a question."
This isn't the first laugh Streep wrings from the lengthy opening act interview scene which introduces all four principals but it's her first "joke" in the movie as Andie's (Anne Hathaway) interview wraps up. I still remember the peals of laughter in the theater.

04 "Why is no one reh-dee?" AND "By all means move at a glacial pace. You know how that thrills me."
So quotable. These two lines are fraternal twins though they are separated by the bulk of the movie. They both spin their comedy from Miranda's exasperated and exasperating impatience. The second impatient quip is uttered when she is at her weakest, determined to work and succeed even in the face of another divorce. The breathy weariness that she employs when annoyed is suddenly not an affectation but the reality.


03 "This...stuff?" (aka the "Cerulean" monologue)
This whole speech, in which Priestley schools her clueless new assistant, is gold. We've written about it before. What's truly remarkable about the scene, which I'd name as the best in the film, is that it's madly multitasking. It brings all four principles together and underlines their place in the narrative while showing us not just workplace politics but actual work (a rare site in movies!). It's a showboating monologue that doesn't interrupt the flow of the storytelling but is the story.


We already know that Miranda Priestely is an über bitch and a major success, but suddenly we're forced into reconsidering our own ideas about the value of what she does and why she's so good at it; it's not just Andie's education but ours. Miranda is working during the whole speech -- "I think we need a jacket here" -- and teaching us the business. The speech, beautifully written and exceptionally delivered, is actually full of hostility and condescencion but somehow we emerge from the other end of it not hating being dressed down but enjoying our own comeuppance. Plus it's "sort of comical" to borrow from the fashionista headmistress herself.

02 "That's all."
It's not that it's her signature catchphrase. It's that each and every time those two syllables slip from her mouth, they carry different weight and meaning. And yet, it's never so simple an actor's trick as varying the punctuation mark. "That's all" is always quiet and simple like a period. It's never an exclamation point, question mark, or even ellipses. So how does she do it? We don't know. It's a magic trick from a seasoned confident showman. Professional magicians don't give away their best secrets.

01 "So often they turn out to be dissapointing and... stupid." AND "I said to myself 'Go ahead. Take a chance. Hire the smart fat girl.'"
These twin lines in which she brutally crushes both Emily (stupid) and Andie (fat) are SO mean. But the brillance of Meryl's delivery is that though the text is actually about Miranda admitting fault the delivery is anything but that. She's coddling herself throughout, gently coaxing herself to 'take a chance' and forgiving herself by blaming both assistants. The self regard is as tall as the office building and as transparent as the glass behind her. It's funny, too.

[Great Moments in Screen Bitchery #12, The Devil Wears Prada]

Listen, it's true that any number of actresses would have been great fun in this role. But Meryl Streep isn't just playing the caricature but a character. She's finds abundant shade and multiple gradations of color. Other actresses would have been blue; Meryl Streep is turquoise, lapis and cerulean.

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Which brings us to Oscar nomination #14. We're almost done surveying the Streep Oscar fields, how about that?

And the nominees were...

• Penélope Cruz, Volver
• Judi Dench, Notes on a Scandal
• Helen Mirren, The Queen *winner*
  
• Meryl Streep, The Devil Wears Prada *Nathaniel's vote*
  
• Kate Winslet, Little Children
  

Other women for context
Probably Came Close: none; Traction Trouble: Maggie Gyllenhaal (Sherrybaby)... but what a performance! Her best outside of Happy Endings I think. I wish I'd nominated her for my own awards.; Low Impact (Not Necessarily Their Fault): Annette Bening (Running With Scissors), Kirsten Dunst (Marie Antoinette), Ivana Bacquero (Pan's Labyrinth), Gretchen Mol (The Notorious Bettie Page), Laura Dern (INLAND EMPIRE), Naomi Watts (The Painted Veil); Box Office Queens: Beyonce Knowles (Dreamgirls), Jennifer Aniston (The Break-Up) and Toni Collette (Little Miss Sunshine)

What's your favorite Streep moment in Prada? And now that we have four years worth of hindsight, what do you think of the 2006 field but more specifically, what do you make of the absolute lack of competition both in who the final five would eventually be and in who won?

if you liked this post, try also... Streep at 60 or 10 Best Pfeiffer/Catwoman Line Readings
return to full blog for fresh posts

Fall Films: Harry Potter, Anne Hathaway and More

A movie tagline from Warner Bros...


Do you promise? Because I am so ready for that particular franchise to wrap up. I didn't say nice things about the Deathly Hallows in my FALL FILM PREVIEW over at Towleroad because the corporate greed has left a bad taste in my mouth. Movie tickets are like $13ish now in NYC but 3D is like $18ish so instead of people paying $13 to see the Potter finale they're going to have to pay $36. No way does that book need 5 hours to tell itself. That's like when TV series end their seasons with those bloated 2 hour finales and it's totally obvious that they're only used to dreaming up 1 hour of drama. Prepare for FILLER at high prices.

"Movies are as addictive as dope, but they are far less injurious to health and they ought not to be as expensive."
-Quentin Crisp

Anyway, that's just a small part of the article so go read it.

Which film are you most looking forward to in the next three months? I'm getting more excited about David Fincher's The Social Network which I understand would be a classy answer to the question. I like nearly all of his movies and l-o-v-e a few of them. I haven't read the rave reviews that have been making the rounds (I don't like to read reviews before watching movies) but I did think it was absurdly hilarious that Blurb Whore Peter Travers is suddenly acting like he's a tough-to-please Slant critic or something.

If it's the first film he's given 4 stars to this year, how does he explain all those 'Hallelujah i've seen the face of god in this masterpiece' type of quotes that are plastered all over 2010 movie posters just like they are every year?

This friend-of-a-friend style -"review" for Love and Other Drugs seems much less suspicious...


I don't necessarily think LaOD is going to be a great movie but it's probably the one I'm most looking forward to (prior to December that is. Black Swan is the ultimate "want now"!). That's entirely due to my twin devotion to Jack & Lureen Twist. I was watching The Devil Wears Prada again the other night (post forthcoming) and just stunned myself with how much I love looking at Anne Hathaway's face. I could watch her closeups in slo-mo for hours.

A loyal Film Experience reader who wishes to remain anonymous also saw a recent screening of LaOD and sent a few thoughts:

The movie is well above average in the world of romantic comedy, and rest assured, that's what it is. As you could clearly note from the trailer, it has all of the usual romcom trappings and succeeds primarily due to the strength of Jake & Anne's chemistry - which is ENORMOUS and immensely satisfying. I must admit, and then dodge anything you might throw my way, that I'm not a big fan of Rachel Getting Married, or Anne's performance in it. So, given that, I'd have to say that this is her best performance. It's really a perfect role for her, as it's mostly comedic (which is where she excels) with tinges of drama.

Jake pulls off the smarmy-but-charming almost George Clooney-esque character incredibly well, and his character's transformation as he becomes more involved with Anne is not necessarily written as well as it could have been, but he's great. And he ultimately sells one of the rather cliché romcom moments far better than anyone had any right to. It's really all about the two of them, so the supporting cast's screen time is quite limited, although Oliver Platt steals every scene he's in.

P.S. Jake & Anne spend like half the movie completely naked. This movie is sexxxxxxy

I ignored the heresy about not loving Anne in RGM. Wha...? We briefly talked Oscar. He thinks Anne is a real possibility but only if the movie itself gets good reviews but even though he loved it, he doubts that a movie that is essentially a romantic comedy will get much play.

Of course, there are a lot of factors involved in winning Oscar favor and the court of public opinion can be very persuasive for voters. I haven't seen the movie yet so I'm speaking generically about Oscar races. When movies are big hits, they often transcend feelings about their genre. And couldn't this be a big hit?

• Which fall film are you dying to see?
• Are you aching for a rom-com that isn't terrible? (There's been a famine)
• Do you mind parting with $36 to see the conclusion of Harry Potter?
• And I guess we should start discussing it. Do you see a bright Oscar future for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (either part)?
  

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Early Emmys: Hathaway, NPH and a Mad Men Rant

I've neglected to mention that Our Miss Anne Hathaway is now an EMMY winner. (The Emmys have so many hundreds of categories, that they have to start weeks before the actual show in passing them out.) Next step: Oscar... or maybe Tony? (she did get bang up reviews for her theater gig in Twelfth Night, too) Yay! She won the prize for her Simpsons voicework in the episode "Once Upon a Time in Springfield."


Voicework for The Simpsons is always a good idea for actors.

1. You get paid.
2. It's probably fun.
3. It's a pop culture merit badge. Many celebrities have have had the honor -- everyone from La Pfeiffer through George Takei to Don Cheadle -- but you're still in a cool club.

But... you don't actually win Emmys for it. That can't be a reason to do it. While the principle Simpsons cast (Yeardley Smith, Julie Cavner, Nancy Cartwright, Dan Castellanata, Hank Azaria) has won several Emmy awards, Hathaway is only the third non-series regular to win or even be nominated. The first was Jackie Mason who guested on three episodes as Rabbi Krustofski. Kelsey Grammar, who has "appeared" in 13 episodes won later. Maybe they changed the rules and this won't be so unlikely in the future I don't know -- it's so hard to keep track of Emmy rules and there hundreds of categories.

<--- Red Carpet Break. To your left is Kristin Chenoweth & Kathy Griffin doing Charlie's Angels on the red carpet. They're such hams. I don't watch Life on the D List that often -- finding KG funny but quite wearying in repetition -- but the recent episode that Cheno appeared in was hilar', especially when they went all Singin' in the Rain moment with Kathy "singing" with Cheno's voice.

Some Early Prizes
Guest Actress Comedy Betty White SNL
We knew that was coming but she did not attend. Strange.
Guest Actress Drama Ann-Margret Law & Order: SVU
Was she a victim, a perp, a witness? Doesn't matter. She's Ann-Margret! (pictured further down the page)
Guest Actor Comedy Neil Patrick Harris, Glee
He finally has his Emmy, two of them actually since he also won as part of the Tony ceremony team. Congrats NPH. Now have those babies with Burtka and take that well deserved break. Just don't stay away too long.


Guest Actor Drama John Lithgow Dexter.
I haven't seen this particular season yet but it's about to arrive for my viewing. Lithgow is practically magnetized when it comes to awards statues so it's a little weird that he couldn't manage the Oscars. I think if he went back to movies full time, it'd be a done deal. He has 4 Emmys, 2 Golden Globes and 2 Tonys. No joke.
Host, Reality Series Jeff Probst, Survivor.
Are people still watching that. Sheesh. Expiration dates, people!
Casting Comedy Series Modern Family
Casting Drama Series Mad Men
Both casting awards are well deserved, don't you think... especially Modern Family in its first season. Mad Men only had to find key new players and guest stars.

A couple more notes...

Wendy?
Yes, Lisa.
Is the water ready?
Yes, Lisa.
Shall We Begin?
Yes, Lisa

Wendy and Lisa, pictured above to the right, won for scoring Nurse Jackie. They have a different type of career since those 80s Prince paisley rock days but it's still celebrated, so good on them. Nurse Jackie is such a strongly conceived show up to and including those opening credits and the music. I still think it's pilot episode is one of the most perfectly constructed pilots television has ever seen. It's fun to see Wendy holding a golden trophy. Now, can Wendy's wife Lisa Cholodenko (a different Lisa mind you) repeat that trick at the Oscars for The Kids Are All Right?

RANT! And finally because the Emmys always find some way to piss me off, it should be known that The Tudors bested Mad Men in the field of costume design. This means that Joan Bergin now has three Emmys for her four seasons of eligible work on The Tudors thus far and the absolute genius of Janie Bryant, Mad Men's costume designer, is still zero for three (though she won previously for Deadwood). Bryant goes home statueless each year of Mad Men despite delivering complex ultra-specific character costuming work with evolving period details that has also affected actual fashion trends in the outside world it's so smartly executed. Blasphemy!

See, Royalty Porn is the simplest statue-winning trick at the Emmys, too. It's not just the Oscars that will always give you a prize for dressing Queens.


...or undressing them in the case of Jonathan Rhys-Meyers.
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Yes, No, Maybe So: Love and Other Drugs

The buzzy romantic dramedy set in the Viagra sales world known as Love and Other Drugs has a full trailer now. Let's give it our trademark 'Yes No Maybe So' treatment. You do the same in the comments. Because, well, it's fun. It's a healthy way to manage expectations -- You vs. the Hype! -- forcing yourself to see the potential good, bad and inbetweens of a future film experience.



Yes. It's no secret that I'm exceptionally fond of both of both Jake Gyllenhaal and Anne Hathaway, two of the best 20something actors on the planet.That designation won't last much longer as Anne turns 28 and Jake 30 as the year wraps up. But the thirtysomething years are often the peak ones for movie stars so if Jake & Anne raise their respective games here and really deliver as leads, we could be looking at amazing decades ahead for both of them, rather than a deflation of the early promise. At any rate, it'll be fun to see them reunited post Brokeback Mountain. I'm of the opinion that Hollywood would be smart to offer moviegoers more frequent screen pairings of actors that have already proven their chemistry. It's a through line that can make movies extra magical and it's just bewildering that Hollywood doesn't see it since as a business they love repeating past successes in just about every other way.


No. Well, there is the potential problem of this being a story we've seen a bazillion times (minus the viagra bit): cocksure young successful man who isn't the settling down type finally meets a girl who turns his world upszzzzzzzz. Sorry, I fell asleep thinking of 2,302 other movies whose names have escaped me. If these movies aren't made with great flair, they're virtually undistinguishable from each other at core.

Maybe So. This is what I find most surprising. I've never really liked an Edward Zwick picture before but I want to see this. It always seems like he's trying to win an Oscar rather than make a movie... but perhaps it's the earnest Baity historical subject matter he tends to favor that gives this impression. Maybe this more contemporary story will loosen up his direction and he will finally get that Best Picture nomination he's been chasing since the 80s. He's won the Oscar as a producer (Shakespeare in Love) but none of his own directorial efforts have been nominated. Even the ones Oscar really liked like Blood Diamond and Glory.

I'm a yes. I want to see Anne & Jake sparkling in synch. And you?
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Linkville

Serious Film Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory = Se7en. lol.
The Playlist Edgar Wright (Scott Pilgrim) names his favorite musicals.
Low Resolution Nekked James McAvoy and the failings of the internet.

ooh, thanks E.T. LOVE AND OTHER DRUGS sneak!

i09 wonders how TV can repeat the success of Smallville. But I have to ask: why does it have to be a teen angst show? There's a million different ways of doing superheroes. Unfortunately people are only trying two of those ways. You can get away with generic at the movies while the genre is at its peak, but peaks don't last forever and if everything keeps feeling "samey" eventually people will get bored.
Geekscape 10 strangest tv and film adaptations ever.
Extra Criticum takes issue with "The New Yorker"'s take on The Kids Are All Right.

Finally, CHUD collects some photoshopped tomfoolery about Inception and calls it a "meme". Oh internets you confuse me. A meme used to just be a thing everyone was passing around like surveys or questionnaires or themes like blog-a-thons without the date specificity. Now apparently it's about lolcat style photo-captioning? I can't keep up internets. But some of them are funny so read the post. And this is really the last time I'm going to mention this movie (until precursor season at least) because I'm so bored with it now. Fast fade... just not enough left to the imagination so how can the imagination stay engaged?

Thoughts I Had While Watching... Alice in Wonderland

[Sigh]. You guys...

"Where have you been lurking?"

I've been meaning to write about Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland for weeks now. But every time I so much as thought about doing so I felt a pit in my stomach as deep as that rabbit hole to Underland. I hate the movie sooooooo much. The flames... breathing... on the side of my face.

Why must it exist to taunt me with its billion dollar gross? Way to reward a filmmaker for lazy stagnation. Just pick a famous property, collect your usual coconspirators and then throw shit at the screen. Literally! You can convert it to 3D later. A billion dollars will be yours! As long as the masses recognize the title and you have a bankable star, you're gold. (See also: Sherlock Holmes).

I can't bear to watch the movie a second time. I usually skim back over when I write about films -- so these are just a few scattered thoughts expanded from my notes and my tortured memories of the nightmare witnessed.

<--- Alice sees a green spotted pig because, why the hell not? Nothing has to make any sense. The very essence of the property robs the lazy of having to pick which of their visual ideas to use.

Underland
What was with the "Underland" thing anyway? If you wanna get cute about messing with the title, at least have the balls to change it. Tim Burton's Alice in Underland would still be a stinking pile, but a rose by any other name would not smell as rancid. It can be quite enjoyable and fascinating to see artists riff on past stories, concepts and ideas from previous artists which is why we should all be thankful for the public domain (which greedy corporations are always trying to end... as if they had any hand in the original blood sweat and tears creativity). Once a story has been around for 50-75 years, shouldn't it belong to the world in actuality the way it belongs to the world in the abstract sense?

But just because you can riff on a past work, doesn't mean you should. Especially if you have nothing of value to add.

Ugliness
Mia Wasikowska is a pretty young thing but Alice is a dud. And she's even slightly ugly of personality at the end. Why does the screenplay make her mean spirited? At the end of the movie she actually humiliates her suitor by mentioning an unattractive health problem he has (I forget what it was). Yes, she is right to refuse the marriage offer from Lord Doofus (I don't care what his character name is, it matters not). But to humiliate him while doing so? Most lazy pandering movies present the unsuitable suitor as SO unsuitable that virtually no one should ever marry them. Said suitor should die miserable and alone. Remember WAY back in the day (a decade back, I guess) when movie women did not have hateful suitors or fiancees? As recently as the 90s filmmakers used to trust the audience to understand the nuance of "this guy is not right for her, which is too bad because he's kind of cool/nice." (see Reality Bites, Sleepless in Seattle and others). It wasn't always "this guy MUST be humiliated because he is so awful and oh, the very thought of her with him! You go girl, dump his ugly/insufferable/rude/unfeeling/cheating ass!" I swear to God Hollywood thinks we all have the EQs of lint. "This character good *grunt*. This character bad *grunt*."

Wouldn't her film-ending decision have had more gravitas if she had to say no to a good guy because, the dull domestic life wasn't for her. She's made for larger world travelling ambitions. Wouldn't that be more stirring? Something to actually think about while the credits played? I mean who wouldn't run from the life choice presented her? What kind of a character arc is that?

But her ugly insult and lame story arc is only a tiny thing. Everything in the film is ugly, whether by design, color combinations or sheer excess: The sets, the busy costumes, the special effects. Even Anne Hathaway is ugly and how is that possible exactly? That's not possible without the aid of hideous lighting and makeup design.

It's hard to feel bad about The Court and its way of life being destroyed in The Mad Hatter's backstory exposition flashback scene because that is ALSO garish. Sure, burn it down. No one will miss it.

Johnny & Helena & Alan
Johnny Depp has starred in seven Tim Burton films. The first two collaborations are classics (Edward Scissorhands and Ed Wood) The third is solid (Sleepy Hollow). Thereafter its tough to argue that he was necessary or even right for any of the roles. You can't be a daring unpredictable weirdo icon if you become totally safe, predictable and familiar in your daring unpredictable weirdness. These things don't go together. MOVE ON.

The only actors who seem to be working above the material are Alan Rickman, a droll voice choice for the stoned caterpillar with that resonating slightly phlegmy bass of his and Helena Bonham-Carter. Her red queen is the saving grace of the film. Or rather the life raft. The film is not saved but her impeccable timing and focused stylization generally make her scenes tolerable. It's even hard to be annoyed by the nonstop CGI "help" because she knows what she's doing and she's doing it skillfully.


"You've lost your muchness."
This line, spoken by the Mad Hatter to Alice is a good one. It could well apply to Tim Burton, though. He has definitely lost his muchness. In its absence, he compensates with MUCH. The film is always always always too much. Every scene is tricked up with gaseous CGI swirls as if the celluloid can't stop farting.

Even the Chesshire Cat, usually a textbook example of the simplicity of great illusions, doesn't really disappear so much as dissapate into computer generated fumes. Adding to the smell is the distinct impression that the print had been urinated on by someone with a Jabberwocky sized bladder. Why was garish yellow their color of choice?

The movie's over compensating muchness, most obvious in its hideous color palette, busy f/x detailing (wait, this quarter of the frame is empty... throw some weird animal into it! Hurry!!!) and super long redundant sequences which manage to convey exactly one idea each -- fall, chase, fly, fight, etcetera -- reminded me of four other movies. George Lucas's entire ugly Star Wars prequel trilogy has a similar redundancy of one note scenes as well as a shared affinity for grotesque but unappealing creature designs. And most of the action sequences, lamely executed to a one, reminded of that patience testing dinosaur run in King Kong. King Kong was a fairly successful remake but that one scene stuck out like a sore thumb. It added virtually nothing to the story, it was redundant visually, it was OBVIOUSLY special effects (so the film stopped feeling seamless) and it went on forever... at least twice its justifiable length.

These are not good things to be reminded of.
F

<--- "Goodbye sweet hat"

Some final statistics & observations

• Running time in Underland: 108 minutes
• Running time in Nathaniel's apartment: 108 hours
  
• Length of time before I became annoyed: 41 seconds. I blame the absolutely unsurprising score by Danny Elfman. Same as it ever was. I liked his score for Milk a lot recently. Step away from the Burton, Danny Elfman, Danny Elfman.
• Standard length of time before Nathaniel usually starts shifting uncomfortably in his seat hoping that the movie will soon end: 91 minutes (comedy) / 109 minutes (drama) / never (A/A- minus level movies. I just watched The Best Years of Our Lives which is 172 minutes long and I could have watched an additional 220 minutes if William Wyler had only let me. But that's a topic for a forthcoming post.)
• Moment in which I stopped hating the movie briefly but can't for the life of me remember why: Something about the Mad Hatter in his new office making hats for The Red Queen.
  
• Percentage of scenes with more f/x than there needed to be: 89%
• Missed opportunities for subtext: ∞
  
  
• Last time it was super easy to love a Tim Burton live-action movie without reservations: 1996's Mars Attacks!
  
• Last time Tim Burton made a truly excellent movie: 1994's Ed Wood
  
• Moment I began to suspect that Alice was by far the worst movie Tim Burton had ever made: The 43 second sequence in which Alice falls down through the green scree -- rabbit hole and keeps on falling. And keeps on falling. And kept on falling through sloppy green screens and random imagery, furniture and obstacles that she had to duck or collide with. Was it a movie? A video game level? A test reel? A bad drug trip? Whatever it was, it was pointless. I don't know if you've ever timed other big movie sequences but 43 seconds is a really long time. You can fit a lot into 43 seconds if you aren't phoning it in or editing on quaaludes.
  
• Offscreen moment of which I am most ashamed: Wishing Helena Bonham-Carter and Tim Burton would have a horrible row and break up for good. One should never wish ill on happy couples. But she's such a good actress and she's just stuck in ever worsening movies.




• Number of times I wished that Anne Hathaway had never seen Amy Adams' Enchanted performance: 1,194
• Number of times you miss something 3D cool if you watch it in 2D: 0
• Number of times I thought about great Tim Burton films wistfully: 94
• Number of times I even wished I was watching Planet of the Apes or Charlie and the Chocolate Factory: 4
• Number of times I lost the will to live: 1*
  
• Number of times I actually died: 0
• Number of future films by Tim Burton I'd like to see: ...guess.

*I made it all the way through this article without once mentioning Johnny Depp's breakdancing. Wait, oops!
*

Anne Hathaway is An Emmy Nominee!

Just two years after landing her first Oscar nod for Rachel Getting Married, Princess Anne Hathaway can now add Emmy nominee to her honors.


She won the notice for voicing Penelope Mountbatten-Hohenzollern-Mulan-Pocahontas or "Princess Penelope" for short on The Simpsons. Considering she also wins raves on stage (see Twelfth Night in Central Park from previous season) and she can sing, she's got multiple awards in her future. How many years until she's a triple crowner or even an EGOT winner.

Her competition in the Outstanding Voice-Over Emmy category: H Jon Benjamin for Archer, Dave Foley for Disney Prep & Landing, Seth Green for Robot Chicken, and Dan Castellanata and Hank Azaria from The Simpsons.

Further Reading
Cinema Blend Read Katey Rich's best & worst from the nominee pool.
Gold Derby Rob Licuria gives his good bad and ugly take on the noms.
Low Resolution Joe Reid's take on the nominations. Fun notes.