Mary-Louise Parker Is... Mary Louise Parker!

Thoughts I had while watching... RED (2010)

A few years ago I attended one of those New Yorker festival interviews that featured Mary-Louise Parker and the writer/moderator called her "a chameleon" after showing a clip of her from a movie I didn't recognize in which she wore a blond wig. It was the most ridiculous thing I heard that entire movie year.

Mary-Louise Parker is not a chameleon. Mary-Louise Parker plays Mary-Louise Parker. Like most enduring star actors, she's very very good at her one role.

This random memory came to me while watching RED, the October action comedy (yes, I'm two months late.) about Retired and Extremely Dangerous operatives, that the Golden Globe and Satellite voters unfortunately tossed into the precursor-mandated viewing schedule.

In the film Mary-Louise Parker plays Mary-Louise Parker with a headset. She works a boring job answering phones in some payroll divison of government and she enjoys flirting with retired killer Bruce Willis played by not-retired action star Bruce Willis. Once someone takes a hit out on Willis, MLP gets caught up in the madness.

All of the delightful MLPisms were there: the stoned line-readings, the sly smiles, the wide eyed narcisstic "this is happening? to me ???" wonder, that improbably unique fusion of frazzled and narcotized performance energy as if her body and mouth have never quite decided which brain  chemicals or illegal substances are in power during that moment.

The movie is not good. But I can't lie and say I didn't enjoy it at all. Here are the things I enjoyed about it most in descending order.

• Mary Louise Parker playing Mary Louise Parker.
• Bruce Willis playing Bruce Willis.
• Mary Louise Parker mumbling "pizza" from beneath duct tape after much unintelligible screaming about being tied up and duct-taped. It's true, I LOLed.
• Mary Louise Parker hiding behind Bruce Willis when confronted with John Malkovich playing John Malkovich. My what big teeth he has. "All the better to chew scenery with, my dear"
• Karl Urban being sexy, especially whilst wounded. 
• Bruce Willis casually stepping out of a madly spinning car, as if it's in park and he's just running errands... with loaded firearms.

But mostly I did not enjoy it. For these reasons.

• Brian Cox mangling a Russian accent. 
• Rebecca Pidgeon being cast as someone who you're not supposed to know is sinister, because she's always sinister.
• This is a personal thing but I have a super low tolerance for "comedies" that think rapidly escalating body counts are hilarious. And seriously this thing is vile with the 'killing people is fun and wacky! twinkly cheer.
• That neighborhood where not a single house lights up or neighbor emerges while a group of men machine gun a house for what feels like an hour.
• General laziness.
• The pervasive feeling that it might never end.

• The joke with the stuffed pig did not work. The set up, punchline and execution didn't feel at all in synch for what was, I can only presume, supposed to be a big takeaway gag. I mean, they even sent awards voters that very pig (albeit in miniature form).

Monty, who attacks stuffed animals on sight, was weirdly docile
when confronted with "the pig".

Lastly, I did not enjoy Morgan Freeman as Morgan Freeman or Helen Mirren as Helen Mirren because they both seemed to be phoning it in for a quick buck and both are capable of so much more. Seriously, do these two ever say "no" to an offer? Did any big-salaried actors make easier paychecks this year?

Even if you didn't see the movie... (you dodged a bullet --- thousands of them actually) do you like it when Mary-Louise Parker plays Mary-Louise Parker?
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You Were Saying...? (Extended Thoughts on Previous Topics)

I pray my occasional 'look at these comments!' posts don't come off as desperate. I'm just a very chatty person, what can I say? Since we are all becoming cyborgs, comments feel closer to conversation all the time. One day we will all forget how to speak. We will grow extra sets of fingers for more typing speed. Evolution will shrink our hands so that we can text with greater ease on our tiny devices.

First, I wanted to thank everyone who offered up music suggestions ♪ ♫  in the Grammy Awards post. I've already started investigating your recommendations since I usually have at least one "music of the year" or "music video of the year" posts in late December.  Keep 'em coming.

Last year about this time the public was going wild for The Blind Side and I included an "Overheard" conversation about it. Broooooke recently discovered the year old post and feels bad that Sandra got such flack for winning because the performance (if not the film) holds up. I would love to include more of those overheard posts but I'm telling you it is SO hard to eavesdrop in NYC. You're oft thwarted by noisy subway trains and traffic and whispering (damn you quite people in noisy cities!). Just last week two older men in suits right next to me on the subway were discussing the Oscar race. I was dying to eavesdrop but alas... major subway noise and then my stop.

A related note on Sandra B: Rebecca finds it odd that people lament the Academy's refusal to give older women the Oscar in the Annette Bening post but also bitch about Sandra's win. Sandra was 45 when she won. But more on this age & oscar topic this week ~ Article in Progress. 

Viggo & Fassy on the set of A Dangerous Method

Patrick F recently declared it a life goal to see all of Viggo Mortenson's movies. I was just thinking about Viggo yesterday and how long it took him to get really famous. It was a by-association thought. I was watching Fish Tank (so good, right?) and dreaming about seeing Viggo and Michael Fassbender as Freud & Jung in A Dangerous Method or The Talking Cure or whatever David Cronenberg is calling that psychiatric bio these days. They seem like such ideally paired co-stars to me.

Cal read the whole Undertow interview -- that's the Peruvian Oscar submission -- and loves that more Latin American movies are getting international attention "Before it was only Argentina and Brazil." Troia recently saw the movie, too, and thinks it one of the most moving of 2010. I bring this up now after the fact because I'm assuming we're going to hear about the foreign film finalists from AMPAS any day now. I love following the foreign film race but I'm not sure about this whittling down process where suddenly 50+ movies are evicted in the last month before the actual nominations. Imagine being on the campaign trail and then >boom< 'Sorry, you're out before nominations are even announced.' My current 9 predicted finalists are here but this category often holds surprises so no one knows anything.

That Helen Mirren "women in hollywood" speech sure has been making the web rounds (though there weren't many comments here on it.) Still, Manuel recalls the first time he saw the delightful Helen Mirren (Prime Suspects) and was hooked ever after. Mirren only gradually entered my consciousness. The first thing I remember seeing her in is White Nights (1985) where she met her future husband, the director Taylor Hackford. I was kind of in love with Mikhail Baryshnikov at the time (she played his wife) and I only remember two things about the movie today.

1. A shot of Misha stretching to warm up where he lays his head against his entirely vertical leg. As if this is something the human body is supposed to be able to do! 
2. This scene where Misha dances for her and she cries from the beauty of his movement. Or at least that's how I remembered the reason for her tears.

Why the Misha love? Blame childhood in the 1970s. It's probably impossible to imagine for anyone born in the 90s when the only people constantly discussed seem to be reality TV show stars but yes... a ballet dancer was once mega-famous to the point where teenager had posters of him on their walls. I wonder if Black Swan will inspire a mini-fad of renewed interest in ballet? If so that'll sure help Benjamin Millipied from Black Swan.

Odes to Emaciation: Christian Bale's Insane Actorly Commitment

I was just about to go into several interesting comments from the latest link roundup but I could do this all day and I have to move on. See.... in about 4 or 5 hours things start getting really crazy with the awards calendar... but maybe Sheila isn't the only one who is less than excited to see the madness begin. She writes

Ahh, these bullshit awards leave me cold. Why do people fawn over them so? Think of all the past great performances that were left out and you get the message. It's all about timing, timing, timing, especially now...

Timing is indeed the magic element. She's not far off with one key example: Christian Bale's "posterboy routine for committed actors" is finally catching up with him in terms of awards heat. 
Are you as chatty this morning? If not, have another cup o' joe.

"Hoist My Spanks Up!" The Ever-Delightful Queen Helen Mirren Speaks Out.

Behold: Helen Mirren at the Women in Hollywood event. Once she's done re-revelling in Halle Berry's Oscar win (Berry must have preceded her onto the stage), she brings us to the now with this smackdown of Hollywood's relentless and innate sexism.



You don't often hear celebrities getting pointed about the hand that feeds them. Like...

I resent having witnessed in my life the survival of some very mediocre male actors and the professional demise of some very brilliant female ones...

So do I, Helen, so do I. But alas... it's not just Hollywood's fault. The audience has to be held accountable too, don't they? Which tail is wagging which dog exactly?
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IMDb Top 20 Actress List. A Few Late Notes.

Have any of you read this IMDb list which purports to evaluate the "overall importance and impact" of film actresses across the span of the past two decades. That'd be 1990-2009 (though obviously they're including 2010.) I had somehow missed this list which arrived in September I think but I can't let it go by without some comment. I'm not sure what they mean by "impact" exactly... global fame? If so, Angelina is too low. And "importance" is another highly subjective word. The list is as follows.

[I've added the "peak periods" after their names to attempt to show when they were most "important/impactful" or, rather,  "when people cared about them the most" in film.]

1. Julia Roberts  .............[1990-2001]
2. Meryl Streep ..............[1990, 1995, 2002-now]
3. Cate Blanchett ...........[1998-2008]
4. Kate Winslet  .............[1994-2008]
5. Jodie Foster   .............[1990-1997]
6. Nicole Kidman  .........[1995, 2001-2005]
7. Sandra Bullock  .........[1994-2000, 2009-now]
8. Halle Berry  ...............[1991-1992, 1998-2002]
9. Emma Thompson   ....[1991-1995]
10. Angelina Jolie   .........[1999-now]
11. Julianne Moore   .......[1998-2004, 2008-now]
12. Susan Sarandon   ......[1990-1995]
13. Helen Mirren   ..........[2001, 2006-now]
14. Gwyneth Paltrow  .....[1995-2002]
15. Hilary Swank   ..........[1999,2004]
16. Cameron Diaz   .........[1994-2005]
17. Renée Zellweger  ......[1996-2004]
18. Meg Ryan   ...............[1990-2000]
19. Jennifer Aniston   .....[2006-now]
20. Judi Dench   .............[1997-2001, 2005-2006]

I've never attempted to remove my own opinion for an objective list... objective lists are best done by committee. But I did notice that most of the objections to my own personal "Best of the Aughts list" (which only counted 2000-2004 as it was made in 2005) were based on the overall fame and consensus acclaim of the snubees combined with the willful refusal to see that it was a subjectively judged "best/favorite" opinion piece.

But even if you are trying to be objective with "impact/importance" there will be disagreements.

 <--- Nathaniel's #1 "Actress of the Aughts"... if you include the 1990s though, her rank would drop quite precipitously.

For example, I can't figure how Jennifer Aniston ranks at all since they're talking about a decade in Cinema. If you include TV, she is absolutely deserving of a top 20 spot given global fame and tv iconography. But even her romantic comedy features aren't the classics or blockbusters that the other romantic comedy women on the list (Julia + Sandra + Cameron + Meg) have achieved -- usually more than once, too. So I think they're confusing "fame" which she certainly has a lot of with "importance to cinema".

I also think Swank shouldn't rank. She's an active figure for only half of the time frame PLUS her only claim to fame is two roles when all is said and done. Sure those were Oscar winners but that's it. Is there any other modern actor who has managed so much credit for body from such a tiny tissue sample? Because the rest of her resume.. nobody cares. I don't think that's just a personal opinion influencing my observation. Consider that I'm not the biggest cheerleader for Renée Zellweger either but I absolutely agree that she deserves a top 20 spot on a list of this type covering this timeframe. I'd believe that about Aniston too, given her longevity, if anyone could point to any film that was a big deal, either critically or box office wise that she was intrinsic too. Maybe The Break-Up (2006) but isn't that the only possible argument? It's not like people paid for Bruce Almighty to see her.

Also: Gwyneth Paltrow. Similar situation in a way to Jennifer Aniston... i.e. unquestionably one of the biggest celebrities, but one of the biggest actresses? Unless "overall importance and impact" means "size of celebrity" in which case, the list would need serious reworking.

Most surprising (but deserved) inclusion: Meg Ryan. She's the only person who made the list who hasn't been capturing public attention recently and not generally treated positively. I'm proud of the editors for their objectivity there. See, you can usually tell when a list is made by what the rankings are; they always follow current perception meaning that however people are feeling about someone right then matters far more than whatever they felt about them over the course of whatever time frame they're judging. Take Helen Mirren for a prime example. She is very very very busy right now and has sustained the hysteria over The Queen (2006) surprisingly well -- good for her and her team -- so she makes the list but in actuality she has one of those filmographies/ careers where people flit in and out of interest in her quite easily. When she's out of sight, isn't she out of mind?

Missing from the list: I think the most obvious snub is Reese Witherspoon who was working for all of those 20 years and earned a couple of classics, a few self-sold blockbusters and an Oscar as reward.

Your turn. Do you think the editors made the right choices? Or are you mad that they snubbed Uma? Penélope or any other international divas? Oscar-regular Frances? 90s biggies like Michelle, Joan, Winona, Holly, Angela or Demi? Anjelica? Charlize? Laura or Laura? perpetual classic Diane? kooky Helena? bitch-goddess Annette? avant-garde Tilda? Keira or Scarlett? Or maybe Natalie Portman who has been famous for *gasp* 16 years now and still isn't 30.

Links Wide Shut

<--- Jezebel Knight & Day's hideous poster. Apparently massive P&A budgets don't cover photoshop courses.
The Fug Girls check in with Tom Cruise. And then with...
The Fug Girls Nicole Kidman and her red hair. It's still there (whew)
Jane Fonda reports from the set of an (unknown to me) movie.
My New Plaid Pants JA shares his non-negotiables about the proposed Who Framed Roger Rabbit sequel.
Low Resolution Joe completes his countdown of the best Buffy episodes. He has great taste and even better memory.
Movie|Line "8 Ways Toy Story 3 is Exactly like A.I. Artificial Intelligence". Kyle sure builds a strong case here.
The Evening Class has an article about a screening of Jennifer's Body with Diablo Cody in San Francisco. This interview actually makes me want to see the movie.

--->New York Magazine Helen Mirren fishes out her teats to promote Love Ranch which I am seeing tomorrow. Yay. My favorite image from the article is the one I can't share her due to my strict PG rating from the MPAA (although maybe The Film Experience is a full R now because sometimes we talk about the gay and you know how they hate that. Even the talking about it.) Rub-a-dub-dub, Helen's in the tub. She's also as quotable as ever

It’s weird when your life becomes vintage, like a period movie,” she says half-seriously. “I’m getting less notorious as I get older. People forget that I ever was.”

Erik Lundegaard I am always a little surprised when box office articles interest me... on account of numbers kind of bore me. I'm not one for math or profit marginzzz. But Erik connects Toy Story 3 and Jonah Hex beautifully.
Sergio Leone and... Seems that Ken Russell's The Devils (1971) is still being super elusive. iTunes was recently selling it and then just as suddenly yanked it. WB doesn't seem to want it on DVD for Americans. Has anyone here seen it?
popbytes Let's hear it for the boy(s). Kenny Wormald gets the Kevin Bacon role in the remake of Footloose.

RCL: Icy Linney, Hottie Mirren, Canadian Ryan

I couldn't sense excitement out there for my weekly random celeb lineup posts but, all the same, I have to commemorate the Tonys one last time since they were practically Golden Globe-esque last night with the TV & Film stars.

<-- Exclusive Unretouched Photo!
Tonyless veteran Laura Linney congratulates newbie ScarJo on her Tony win. [Apparently Scarlett has never seen Mystic River or The House of Mirth. Ice cold blood puts the rose in those dimpled cheeks. Beware.]

I do want to say though, just as a corrective for what I'm seeing on the web, that The Lovely Laura Linney and Viola Davis don't fit the 'screen stars slumming it inbetween jobs' group situation that Tony voters love but stage aficionados rage against. Viola and Laura are both bonafide stage troupers. They've been doing it for years and if the movie roles ever dried up, it's likely that they'd be perfectly content to hit the boards full time. Linney, by her own admission, prefers it to screens big or small. It's just lucky for us that she can adjust her scale to fit any medium. That's not something just any actor can do. Many have tried but few are as adept at all three as she.

So let's get to dresses...

Best Dressed!

I'm not trying to be cheeky putting the original Wicked stars Kristin Chenoweth & Idina Menzel together in best dressed, I just think they deserve it. Cheno looks great in white and can work a micro dress with the best, even somehow managing non obscene pratfalls in them. Speaking of obscenity: Imagine how much Wicked could charge for tickets if Cheno & Idina were to return however briefly after their post-Wicked fame? Idina, of the less flashy personality, makes up for it with this intricate dress. I hope they took a photo together last night, but I haven't seen it if they did.

Update: They did and here it is (Thanks Emma!)

♪ ♫ It well may be
That we will never meet again
In this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me
Is made of what I learned from you
You'll be with me
Like a handprint on my heart
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have re-written mine
By being my friend... ♪

And let's hear it for two women who have decaying portraits hidden in attics on their estates: Bernadette Peters, 62, who stepped out of some greco-roman sculpture garden complete with curls, and Dame Hotness, 64, in a super flattering dark blue scooped neck gown.

One of the best moments last night was when Mirren shouted out to the people "in the gods". I had somehow never heard this expression before but it's apparently a reference to the balcony (i.e. the cheap seats).

Not So Much

I understand that Jada Pinkett Smith is a relatively fierce woman... but divatude aside, do you really wanna risk comparison to that icy hotness of one Vera Farmiga on Oscar night of all things. It's the same dress in the same color family but chopped in half for a woman who's 7 inches shorter and needs to show leg for the illusion of length. I think Blanchett is auditioning in character as DAZZLER for the next X-Men film. (Yes I made that up. Marvel still has some B list characters left before they get to Alison Blaire.) Sherie Rene Scott seemed to forget that when movie stars are invading your domain you have to pick it up a notch. I mean this is pretty but it's awfully casual when you're celebrating a personal success like Everyday Rapture at an awards show. And finally whenever I look at ScarJo's gown -- which I want desperately to like -- I hear Heidi Klum saying "It looks cheap, no?" Maybe it's the color that's making me think of a glittery dress that some young Vice President of Marketing might wear to her corporate Christmas partay.

You know Cate was all like...

'I have lots of gold but not this kind. Gimme.'

I should note that men were also walking the red carpet last night including 'Canadian Who Lives With Me' and 'That Man That's a Movie Star That I Get To Sleep With Every Night.' It's been nearly 24 hours since the Tonys and I'm still reeling at all the new ways the actresses have found to say "my husband" at awards shows. I only wish we could have heard Helen Mirren's new way of describing Taylor Hackford.

Ricky Martin, who no longer needs any euphemisms, was also present.

Ricky & The Canadian That Lives With Scarlett Johansson

Last night was ... odd.
Helen Mirren, Scarlett Johansson, Cate Blanchett, RYAN REYNOLDS

Yes, No, Maybe So? Love Ranch

We've been ignoring trailers, so we might play catch up this week. Today's future enticement is the 70s brothel drama Love Ranch. Let's map out what makes us want to see it... and not.

If you'd rather not know the entire story, I'd advise you not to watch this particular trailer and just reading the less revealing text.



Most marketing teams don't realize (or perhaps have statistical evidence to the unfortunate contrary) that a well told concept, plot hook and name actors should be enough to hook your target audience. Why do they always think a point by point three act summary is best?

Do we want to see it?

YES.


The cinema has always had a preoccupation with prostitutes; Movie makers see the kinship between show & 'ho business' as well they should. Despite this infamous love affair, the brothel setting is underused. [This is completely tangential, but wouldn't a fictional brothel series be fascinating in the hands of the right HBO or Showtime creative team? There's more than enough TV shows about cops, lawyers and doctors so why not try some other drama-magnet workplaces! Those aren't the only three places where drama is a given.] Anyway, from the looks of the trailer the art direction (Bruno Rubeo and team), costumes (Melissa Bruning) and overall setting should provide moments of interest even setting aside the unknown quality of the script, directing and acting.

Plus there are the girls they're selling which include Bai Ling, Taryn Manning & Gina Gershon. Taylor Hackford and his casting team definitely weren't afraid of scene stealers when they went to work. Or maybe they knew that with Helen Mirren and Joe Pesci leading, scene stealing is a far less likely outcome than scene tug-of-wars.

NO.

The movies love boxers almost as much as hookers. Perhaps filmmakers see a kinship between show & body-blow business? But do we need both in the same movie? Love Ranch could be two full hours of clichéd story beats since we've got entrepreneurs, whores and boxers all battling it out for screen time and narrative arcs in the same movie. Those are three of the movies most familiar types right there. Explosive clichés are probably buried everywhere in that Nevada sand like so many film-derailing landmines.

MAYBE SO.

The casting intrigues. Helen Mirren is always worth a look (though "accent" work is always hard to adjust to in the time span of a trailer) and perhaps her chemistry with Joe Pesci will be odd couple fascinating? But I worry. I can't say that I'm a huge fan of Joe Pesci. He strikes me as an... um... excessive actor and I have a much easier time with 'over the top' when the performer taking me there has a vagina. It's just how I'm wired.

When it comes to Love Ranch are you a Yes, a No or a Maybe So?
And does 'maybe so' mean "wait for reviews" or "I'll watch it on DVD" for you?

Can you Cannes-Cannes?

Julien here, your special correspondent at the Cannes Film Festival.

Where shall I start? First of all, you should know is that this is my first trip to the Festival. A few minutes in, I had already bumped into Her Higness Helen Mirren and her hubby Taylor Hackford, watched Agnès Varda give an interview in the middle of the street, and turned down an invitation to yesterday night's screening of Robin Hood. No need to tell you I feel like a little boy left alone in a candy store.

From here, it seems as if the whole world revolves around cinema: the only thing everyone talks about right now is movies. On TV, on the radio, and in every newspaper in France, movies, movies and more movies. And for a split second, Apichatpong Weerasethakul is a household name, Abbas Kiarostami a semi-god, and Javier Bardem the most famous man in the world. No doubt that in a few days, all this will be forgotten, and people will return to obssessing about Lady Gaga's clothes and Jennifer Aniston's hair, but for now, the hottest ticket in town is Xavier Dolan, as it should be.

So whatever the Festival may bring, let's enjoy every minute of it, for it's one of the only places in the world where movie stars are still the center of the universe.

Helen Mirren... Not Usually One For That Waxy Look

One of the most brilliant things about Dame Helen Mirren has to be how lively and famously sexy she still is in her 60s. It surely has to do with comfort in her own skin since she doesn't seem to be trying to come across like some fresh 45 year-old. One can't really imagine her ordering up plastic surgery or botox. Is that why seeing her pose with her wax self amuses so?


This statue is one of the newbies at Madame Tussaud's in London. Have you ever been there? I went only once here in NYC and found it all surprisingly amusing. I was stunned to find that RuPaul got quite the goddess centerpiece treatment. And this was a couple of years before RuPaul's comeback on RuPaul's Drag Race.

Despite only entering the tourist trap once, I regularly see their statues outside since they're very close to one of the biggest multiplexes here. Waxy Leonardo DiCaprio is hanging outside right now in a suit.

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Happy 'They Aren't Mothers' Day!

Sometimes we resent how the biological drive takes the great actresses away from us for years at a time or even forever. We're selfish about movies. Sue us. You'll be hearing or saying "Happy Mother's Day" all day today -- call your mother! -- but just for something a bit different we'd like to wish the following actresses and directors a "Happy Day!" even though they never had children (biological or adopted).

The Queen... Dame Helen Mirren

There's more than one way to give back to the universe and live on past your own time.

These women have given us much to enjoy so Happy Day to them, too. Some of them, like Katharine Hepburn, are no longer with us and some of them, like Zeéeee and The Lovely Laura Linney may yet still have children... but that's no reason not to cherish what any of them have already given the world over the years.

Formidable Ava, 'Barefoot Contessa' / Enigmatic Julie, 'The Sunshine Girl'

A VERY HAPPY DAY to...

• Helen Mirren
• Patricia Clarkson
• Katharine Hepburn
• Ava Gardner
• Dolly Parton
• Maggie Cheung
  
• Julie Christie
  
• Betty White
• Jacqueline Bissett
• Daryl Hannah
  
• Kim Cattrall
• Lily Tomlin
• Marsha Mason
• Mae West
  
• Juliette Lewis
• Anjelica Huston
  
• Renée Zellweger
• Katherine Bigelow
• Julie Taymor
  
• Lauren Hutton
• Laura Linney
• Tallulah Bankhead
• Parker Posey
• Claudette Colbert
• Kathy Bates
  

Read more about any of them by clicking on their names. Did I forget anyone? (If I missed a pregnancy or adoption announcement for someone, my apologies and best wishes!). We send all of these women virtual flowers and cards today.

This post is dedicated to three of the cinema's very first star actresses: Florence Lawrence (1886-1936), Mary Pickford (1892-1979) and Lillian Gish (1893-1993).

Mary Pickford & Lillian Gish. Their lives made history.

None of them had children but in many ways they helped to invent both the movies and screen acting. Their artistic descendants, one might say, are legion.
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We Can't Wait: BRIGHTON ROCK

Dave here, trying to resist whinging and moaning about the fact no one wanted to see this but me. (Idiots.)

BRIGHTON ROCK
Directed by: Rowan Joffe (yes, son of him who directed The Killing Fields)
Starring: Sam Riley, Andrea Riseborough, Helen Mirren, John Hurt

Sam Riley on the set of Brighton Rock

Synopsis: The second film adaptation of Graham Greene's Brighton Rock, where a violent youth named Pinkie murders a man and marries a naive waitress who could destroy his alibi, pursued by a suspicious older woman who both wants to bring him to justice and protect the innocent girl.
Brought to you by: BBC Films and Optimum Releasing (one of the best distributors in the UK)
Expected release date: No word; could even be next year... I do back the wrong horses, don't I?

I didn't really mean for my first appearance in this countdown project to be so... British, but I suppose it was foolish of me to expect much excitement elsewhere when my main reason for looking forward to this is so personal; I practically dissected Graham Greene's novel in high school, and anything that can survive that amount of scrutinization with love intact is something special indeed. The first adaptation back in 1947 is mostly famous for being Richard Attenborough's breakthrough role, and it's surprising the amount of things they got away with back then. But surely this will be a fuller, more visceral adaptation, merely because it can be. Although the central appeal of film noir is its darkly suggestive nature; let's hope they resist spelling everything out for us modern day folk.

the 1938 "entertainment" by Graham Green| the 1947 film version

Of course, films of books you love are always risky propositions (there's another one later on in the countdown), but the cast tips this my scales in favour of excitement; the ever-reliable John Hurt, the "better in supporting roles, AMPAS" Helen Mirren and two rising stars in Sam Riley, who impressed as Ian Curtis in Control, and Andrea Riseborough, who's been making marks in TV work, most notably as a young Margaret Thatcher. We just have to hope Joffe the Younger - who also wrote the screenplay, pulling the story forward slightly from the 1930s to the 1960s - has a knack for transferring the novel's compulsive moral intricacies on-screen and lives up to Greene's lean, highly cinematic style.

So what do you think, readers? Are you looking forward to chewing on some Brighton rock? Or do you think this new batch should've been left behind the counter?

"We Can't Wait: Summer and Beyond"
The "orphan" picks Nathaniel (Burlesque), JA (Love and Other Drugs), Jose (You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger), Craig (What's Wrong With Virginia?), Robert (True Grit) and Dave (Brighton Rock); Team Film Experience Countdown #12 It's Kind of a Funny Story, #11 Sex & the City 2, #10 Scott Pilgrim vs the World, #9 Somewhere, #8 The Kids Are All Right, #7 The Illusionist, #6 Toy Story 3, #5 Inception, #4 Rabbit Hole, #3 Never Let Me Go, #2 Black Swan and #1 The Tree of Life.

Into Link Groove

general cinema
Dark Eye Socket a triple bill recommendation: frightening fiendish females
Inquirer Entertainment Shirley Maclaine is still quotable. Also babysits Bening-Beatty kids!
Socialite Life Kellan Lutz to play Poseidon in War of the Gods. This story is all over the blog rounds but the best part of the story is the one that's not making any headlines: Tarsem Singh (The Cell, The Fall) is in the director's chair. Therefore, we must assume instant must-see rather than trashy dumb action flick


Old Hollywood Great 70s quote from Patti Smith on French legend Jeanne Moreau
My New Plaid Pants wait, what? Helen Mirren was besties with Brad Davis? Helen Mirren is quite possibly the most fascinating actress with whom I don't have a particularly deep bond. I should learn to love her more
SUNFiltered Isabella Rossellini's uniquely awesome Green Porno series gets a new name and batch of creature carnality
Towleroad Have you heard about this awful situation in a Canadian bar regarding Jake Gyllenhaal and asshole homophobic blogger? Yuck
Life Archives 17 great photos of Steve McQueen, King of Cool [thx]
Queerty a parody of RuPaul's Drag Race

politics and films
i09 has a great piece on healthcare reform through the prism of sci-fi's dystopia stories
Michael Moore have you read this astute Open Letter to Republicans. Funny, sad, and smart in equal measure.

off screen fun
Pop Justice Finland choir does Lady Gaga's 'bad romance'... how long til America tries a version of this reality concept? Post Glee I totally see it happening.
Critical Condition starts a (seemingly massive) Madonna countdown project
I Need My Fix Kristin Chenoweth is delightful whether on Twitter or Ambien or both simultaneously
AIGA/NY an evening of really bad book covers. Sounds interesting
Litely Salted "Oh, Lindsay" I've placed LaLohan in the "offscreen" section because she is obviously no longer movie-related. Which is sad.

"sometimes I dream of things that come to pass"

Happy Valentine's Day! Best Actress Quiz

UPDATED: Now with answers at the bottom of the post

The following quiz is a random assortment of questions inspired by onscreen romances of the Best Actress nominees this year. Though not all of the questions are romantic in nature (murder, abuse and general movie questions also appear) we tried to start there. How many can you answer? The first person to answer each person gets credit when we update with the answers on Monday.

Bullock
Sandra Bullock plays adoptive mother and football fan Leanne Tuohy in The Blind Side. She's happily married to country star Tim McGraw in the film. In her other big hit this year, The Proposal her marriage with employee Ryan Reynolds is a business transaction.

1. Which of Sandra's former co-stars is actually married to a country star. And which movie did they star in together?
2. Which two-time co-star of Sandra's was romantically involved with the actress she was constantly compared to? Who am I talking about and what are their films together?
3. The Proposal isn't Sandra's first romantic comedy with an inappropriate work-place relationship. Name another.
   

Mirren
Perpetually randy screen goddess Dame Helen Mirren tempts her would-be celibate husband with goofy bedroom games in The Last Station.

1. Mirren has played a temptress many times. What's her most infamous film?
2. In which film did she bear the child of her half brother?
3. On which film did Mirren meet her husband?

Mulligan
Carey Mulligan plays Jenny, a 16 year old girl in An Education romanced by a much older man. Though most people are hearing about Carey now, she's been in the movies since 2005.

1. In Mulligan's debut film her onscreen sister was illicitly romanced by an older man. Name the movie.
2. Mulligan has only made 6 films but she's already co-starred with several Oscar nominees. Which of her former co-stars was also nominated for an Oscar this year?

Sidibe
Gabby Sidibe made a stellar debut in Precious. Since it's her first film she's only had two screen romances and both of them were imaginary, one with her 'light skinned boyfriend with real nice hair' and one with the math teacher she fantasizes about. Otherwise her character's sex life has been horrific. Sweet Lenny Kravitz as a male nurse is the first man to show her (chaste) affection.

1. Her imaginary boyfriend's name in the credits to Precious is "Tom Cruise". Has the actual Tom Cruise ever co-starred with any of this year's Best Actress nominees. If so, name the film.
   
2. In a sad coincidence, the actor who plays Precious's beloved math teacher has also played a child abuser. Can you name the film? His onscreen victim in that film was Golden Globe nominated just this year.
   
3. Lenny Kravitz has had plenty of sexy time in videos if not on film. Which two famous 90s actresses, neither of whom had Sidibe's success with awards show voters, have sexed it up in his music videos?

Streep
Meryl Streep jokes about being "a bit of a slut" in It's Complicated but two lovers in one movie is hardly slutty. It's the norm since many romantic movies have love triangles. In her Oscar nominated role in Julie & Julia she's even less of a harlot. For decades she has only had eyes for Stanley Tucci.

1. In which two films was Streep actually a bit of a slut? (i.e. more than two lovers)
   
2. One of Streep's most passionate onscreen romances was with a very famous actor who has also played the husband of one of Streep's fellow Actress nominees. Which actor and which two films am I referring to?
   

Extra Credit

1. Which of these nominees first tasted real fame by playing a role that had already taken another actress to a Best Actress nomination at the Oscars?
2. Which of these nominees played a role that another actress received a supporting actress nomination for playing?
3. Which two of these Actress nominees have been directed by the same man? [There's at least two correct answers]
   
4. Which of these Best Actress nominees has been killed by one of this year's Best Actor nominees in another movie?
5. Which two of these actresses both did voice work for the same animated film?

More on the Best Actress race. A shorter visual quiz if this one has stumped you: Who sent these Valentine's Day Cards? If you'd like to read previous posts on these actresses, click on the labels below.

THE ANSWERS

Bullock

1. Nicole Kidman (Practical Magic) is married to Keith Urban
2. Benjamin Bratt (Miss Congeniality, Demolition Man) was once Julia Roberts's man
3. Two Weeks Notice with Hugh Grant

Mirren

1. the X-Rated Caligula (1979)
   
2. Excalibur. She plays the wicked Morgana, mother to King Arthur's bastard son Mordred
3. White Nights with Mikhail Baryshnikov. Her husband is Taylor Hackford, who directed that film. He also directed her in the forthcoming whorehouse drama Love Ranch (2010)
   

Mulligan

1. Pride and Prejudice (1995)
   
2. Colin Firth (And When Did You Last See Your Father?)
   

Sidibe

1. Tom Cruise co-starred with Meryl Streep in Lions for Lambs
2. That'd be Mysterious Skin wherein the fine actor Bill Sage, who played Precious's math teacher, played the coach who abused Joseph Gordon-Levitt in his youth.
3. Gina Gershon ("Again") and Heather Graham ("American Woman") starred in his music videos -- the first one is curious. Gershon isn't sexy enough for someone? IMPOSSIBLE!
   

Streep

1. Mamma Mia! Three guys in one week? Who is Amanda Seyfried's babydaddy?
2. Plenty. Meryl is a bonkers gal who is continually lovin and leavin' em in this post war drama. Super hot (by which I mean ice cold) sex scene with Sting. (review)
   

Extra Credit

1. Pre-Speed, Sandra Bullock starred in the television series adaptation of Working Girl, playing Melanie Griffith's role.
2. Sandra Bullock again playing Truman Capote's fellow author friend Harper Lee in Infamous. Catherine Keener was Oscar nominated for that same role in the similar Capote (2005).
3. Barbet Schroeder directed both Bullock (Murder By Numbers) and Streep (Before and After)
   Lee Daniels directed both Mirren (Shadowboxer) and Sidibe (Precious)
   Robert Altman directed both Mirren (Gosford Park) and Streep (A Prairie Home Companion)
4. Jeff Bridges buried Sandra Bullock in The Vanishing (1993). He wasn't a nice guy.
   
5. Mirren and Bullock were part of the massively star heavy voice cast list for the animated Biblical epic The Prince of Egypt (1998).
   

*

Best Actress, Oscars Ballot and My Own

I love actresses too much.

It makes life complicated for me emotionally. I fuss and fuss and fuss and refuse to fill out my Best Actress ballot each year because I don't want to leave any of my favorite ladies out. I don't want to hurt any of their (imaginary) feelings. Oscar, on the other hand, doesn't mind leaving my favorites out. They do it all the time.

The Oscar Nominees

• Sandra Bullock, The Blind Side
• Helen Mirren, The Last Station
  
• Carey Mulligan, An Education
  
• Gabourey 'Gabby' Sidibe, Precious
  
• Meryl Streep, Julie & Julia

In truth, I like all five of those performances. I think they're all good and better than the films that house them and they all strike me as very "right"... at least in terms of the idea that the Oscar lists are essentially an industry stamp, a group pronouncement of "This is what we do and value!". You've got the big stars in biopics (Meryl & Sandra), the breakout sensation (Mulligan), the old pro who could do this in her sleep but does it very very very well you have to admit (Mirren) and the magical debut (Sidibe).

I want Meryl Streep to win.

I've made no secret about that. I'm tired of waiting for that third Oscar to come and she's just delightful in Julie & Julia even if it's no patch on something like The Devil Wears Prada which she should have won for (I'm sorry but what she accomplished there was far beyond what Helen Mirren was doing in The Queen). But she didn't make my list (just barely). See what I mean about complicated emotions?

Whatever the outcome of Oscar's race -- and I can feel myself checking out on Best Actress in particular (my favorite category) -- because if Streep isn't going to win I'm so not interested. (I think Bullock's nomination is cute in a Big Hollywood way. But all the wins make me nauseous. That's taking it way too far. I see Roberto Benigni dancing on chairs again and everybody being embarrassed about their gigantor-obsession almost immediately after the house lights go up.)

My Favorite
But it's all beside the point anyway. I knew the Oscar year would be ruined for me the minute I saw Tilda Swinton in Julia some months ago.


I knew she'd barely be in the conversation come awards season but not only do I think it's the best performance of 2009, I think it's the best performance of 2008 AND 2009... (and maybe 2007, too). That's how great it is. Gold medal! Sorry to give the game away. And though I knew my favorite iconoclastic actress would barely be in the conversation I was and still am shocked that not one critics group could give it up for her. That's forty(proof) kinds of crazy. That's as crazy, reckless, incompetent and dumb as Julia herself! It's even dumber than Julia once you add in the widespread inexplicable shunning of Abbie Cornish in Bright Star. Look, I love Emily Blunt so don't take this the wrong way. She's done more for me than Abbie Cornish (in general) but no way was she more deserving of year-end attention for her costume parade than Cornish was for hers.

MY BALLOT

a drunk criminal, an illiterate victim, a precocious schoolgirl,
a barefoot psycho and a lovestruck seamstress

And yours?

P.S. You can now vote for your favorite among the Oscar nominees on the Best Actress page.

P.P.S. My 15 favorite lead actresses of the year (in alpha order) at this particular moment.


I didn't see everything obvs. And, oh crap, I know who I forgot already...

P.P.P.S. Have you O.D.ed on actressness just reading all of this?
*

The Hurt, Precious, Inglourious, Crazy, Complicated, Blind, Single, Serious, Up-in-the-Air 2010 SAG Awards Liveblog!

txt critic liveblogs SAG

Greetings all. I've just returned from my shitty movie day with my Quizno's, Tasti Delite and Orville Redenbacher in tow, ready and super-pumped for this evening's festivities. Feel free to chime in with any thoughts along the way!

6:17 EST: Revelation from Giuliana Rancic: "Guys, when TV stars and movie stars mix, anything can -- and usually does -- happen."

6:31 EST: She just suggested to Ed Helms that Susan Boyle appear in the "Hangover" sequel.

6:32 EST: Tracy Morgan: "Morgan Freeman could be my daddy."

6:35 EST: Ross the Intern just asked Carey Mulligan "Where is Shia LaBeauof tonight?" and she looked flustered and said "I don't know" (i.e.: "You're not allowed to talk about that"). Awkwaaaaaard.

6:50 EST: Questions are being asked about what Ryan Seacrest does in steamrooms.

6:57 EST: Apparently, the first award of the evening -- for Best Stunt Ensemble -- has been given to "Star Trek."

6:58 EST: Tina Fey just confronted Giuliana with "Are you one of the ones who took a big steaming crap on me last week?" Effing Awesome. For the record, I don't care what anyone says, I LOVED that dress.

7:08 EST: You know you're stoned when you see a commercial for "Valentine's Day" and think for the first time: "Hm, maybe that won't be so bad."

7:12 EST: Me still no likey Jon Hamm + beard

7:19 EST: Whoa, Meryl Streep is wearing a beautifully ugly dress. LOVE it.

7:25 EST: "An Education" seems to be buying a lot of TV spots for this E! pre-show. I know a lot of people who love it. I am not one of them.

7:39 EST: Is it wrong that I completely forgot about the TV awards? I totally associate the SAG awards with movies.

7:47 EST: Gabby Sidibe appears to be WILDLY drunk, and confirms her place as my favorite person at these awards. She just confessed that she's never watched the SAG awards.

7:55 EST: Holy hell. Why do I still get surprised when Helen Mirren shows up somewhere looking sexy as shit?

7:59 EST: Adam Lambert, diva that he is, is the last guest to show up before the awards start. Wait, why is he here?

8:04 EST: Jeremy Irons is wearing sunglasses indoors. Hrm, his pretentiousness is offset by his yellow-and-red bow tie.

8:07 EST: Lead Actor in a Comedy Series. Me say it's Baldwin, though him, Steve Carell and Larry David are all consistently great. I've never seen "Monk" or "Two and a Half Men," so I can't speak for Shalhoub or Sheen. And it's... Baldwin.

8:09 EST: Fuck, Christoph Waltz is handsome.

8:13 EST: Lead Actress in a Comedy Series. I've not seen "Samantha Who" or "The New Adventures of Old Christine." Noticing a theme? I don't really watch CBS except for Letterman. This will probably be Toni Collette. I'd be happy with Falco, Collette or Fey. Whoa, it's Tina Fey for "30 Rock"! Apparently, her 25th win from them.

8:14 EST: "I just want to take a moment to say to everyone at NBC... that we are very happy with everything. And happy to be there." So funny.

8:21 EST: There is currently a clip reel devoted to honoring/commemorating... Comedy. WTF? And set to the wackiest generic music you can imagine. I hate this.

8:23 EST: Man, Ray Romano just made a Kevin Bacon / Jon Hamm joke. Blech.

8:26 EST: Ensemble in Comedy Series. Even though I can't stop watching it, "Glee" consistently infuriates me. As great as the cast of "The Office" and "Curb Your Enthusiasm" are, this should really go to "30 Rock" or "Modern Family," currently my two favorite shows on TV. I'm sure it will be "30 Rock." And it's.... "Glee"?!?! Christ! Okay, I guess none of my issues with the show have to do with the cast, but still! Eh, as long as Jane Lynch gets an award, I can't complain that hugely.

8:28 EST: Gabby and Mo'Nique present a clip from "Precious" while holding hands. Me likey.

8:29 EST: Helen Mirren is presenting BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A MOTION PICTURE

In a just world, would've been nominated: James Gandolfini ("Where the Wild Things Are"), Peter Capaldi ("In the Loop"), Garrett Dillahunt ("The Last House on the Left"), Robert Duvall ("The Road"), Saul Rubinek ("Julia")

ChrIstoph Waltz will probably win this, and he deserves to, but I wouldn't be angry with Woody Harrelson. Christopher Plummer is a threat to win simply because he's old, but the performance really isn't deserving. Damon is fine in "Invictus," but basically just has to shout things in a huddle.

I happen to adore Stanley Tucci, but I seem to be one of the rare few who thinks he's AWFUL in "The Lovely Bones" (though I don't outright hate the movie). He just piles on affectation after affectation -- like talking with a weird speech impediment -- that it feels like a parody of an actor playing a serial killer.

8:32 EST: Yay, it's Christoph! This is a thoughtful, eloquent speech, but it's not the YouTube clip, outpouring of emotion or fireworks display supposedly needed at an early awards like this. Luckily, the performance is strong enough that he doesn't need to rely on anything else to be the Oscar winner.

8:39 EST: Outstanding Female Actor in a Drama Series. The nominees are Patricia Arquette, Glenn Close, Mariska Hargatay, Holly Hunter, Julianna Margulies, and Kyra Sedgwick. I've never seen one episode of any of these shows. Wow, do I not watch any Dramas?

8:41 EST: And it's Julianna Margulies. Okay.

8:45 EST: Male Actor in a Drama Series. Simon Baker, Bryan Cranston, Michael C. Hall, Jon Hamm, Hugh Laurie. Oh, I do watch "Dexter" and "Mad Men." I guess I do watch dramas, just not those boring, lady-driven TNT detective-esque dramas. Yay, Michael C. Hall! Though that Bryan Cranston clip reminded me that I need to start watching "Breaking Bad."

8:47 EST: I will try to cut down on my "An Education" hate, since I really don't hate it, but these clips just remind me that I don't understand what anyone is finding special about this movie. It's a nice, fairly entertaining, middle-of-the-road, learn-your-lesson movies made for grandmothers. But whatever I guess.

8:50 EST: Ensemble Cast in a Drama Series. Never seen "The Closer" or "The Good Wife" and I only half-watch "True Blood," but I love "Dexter" and "Mad Men." This should really be "Mad Men" .... and it is!

9:00 EST: As president of the SAG, Ken Howard is doing his duty by saying some very boring things for minutes on end. He was wonderful in "In Her Shoes."

9:02 EST: And now Sandra Bullock is beginning the presentation of the Lifetime Achievement Award to Betty White. Is it wrong that the former golden girl's appearance in "The Proposal" last year (ever-so-slightly) diminished the love I had for her?

9:18 EST: This "Extraordinary Measures" commercial seems to be advertising a much happier, smilier movie than the two-hour dying-children movie I saw this afternoon.

9:22 EST: Best Actress in a TV Movie or Mini-Series. This should really, really, really be Drew Barrymore. I always like her, but always find her more charming than actually thinking she gave a particularly special performance, but she was truly fantastic in "Grey Gardens." If this goes to her co-star Jessica Lange, it's purely because Lange is older..... Ahhh, awesome, it's Drew!

9:24 EST: Loved that speech. Even with all the "um, um, um," it clearly was coming from the heart. I don't presume to think we actually really 'know' any Hollywood celebrity, but she just seems like a genuine person.

9:27 EST: Best Actor in a TV Movie or Mini-Series. I didn't even hear of these films with Cuba Gooding Jr. and Tom Wilkinson, and alas I missed "Georgia O'Keefe," but Kevin Bacon was terrific in "Taking Chance." It will likely be him... and it is.

9:33 EST: In Memoriam. I know they do it at every single awards show every single year, but I really wish they'd stop doing the applause-meter thing.

9:36 EST: P.S. We're 96 minutes into a supposedly-two-hour-long awards show, and they've officially given out ONE film award.

9:41 EST: SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A MOTION PICTURE

In a just world, would've been nominated: Catherine Keener ("Where the Wild Things Are"), Patricia Clarkson ("Whatever Works"), Marion Cotillard ("Nine"), Vera Farmiga (for "Orphan"), Melanie Laurent ("Inglourious Basterds")

Penelope was fun in "Nine" but she's playing the exact same role she won an Oscar for last year. I happen to love, love, love "Up in the Air" but count me among the few who doesn't think Vera was anything special in it. Sure, she's sexy and has great chemistry with Clooney, but I didn't think the role required a whole hell of a lot. Call me crazy. Kendrick and Kruger are deserving of their nominations, but not for the win. Mo'Nique will be winning this, and rightfully so.

9:43 EST: And like we all thought/knew, Mo'Nique won. She delivered a really excellent speech, to boot, one that seemed (to me) significantly more sincere than her Golden Globes one last Sunday.

9:51 EST: ACTOR IN A MOTION PICTURE

In a just world, would've been nominated: Robin Williams ("World's Greatest Dad"), Nicolas Cage ("Bad Lieutenant"), Matt Damon ("The Informant!"), Tom Hardy ("Bronson"), Viggo Mortensen ("The Road"), Patton Oswalt ("Big Fan"), Sam Rockwell ("Moon"), Michael Stuhlbarg ("A Serious Man")

Honestly, anyone EXCEPT MORGAN FREEMAN would totally deserve this. Colin Firth was my personal favorite (though I didn't love the movie), but Clooney, Bridges and Renner are not far behind. Happy to see anyone win this, but it really should be (and will be) the long overdue Bridges. And unlike Winslet last year, it'll actually be for a deserving performance.

9:54 EST: Jeff Bridges for the win! Good for him. Meryl Streep encourages him to ignore the "Please Wrap It Up" cue.

9:56 EST: ACTRESS IN A MOTION PICTURE

In a just world, would've been nominated: Tilda Swinton ("Julia"), Ellen Page ("Whip It"), Catalina Saavedra ("The Maid"), Charlotte Gainsbourg ("Antichrist")

I want to see Gabourey Sidibe win this. Only her and Helen Mirren gave deserving performances, and Gabby is easily the best in the category. If Tilda had gotten nominated on the other hand... I still say if "Julia" had been put out by a distributor that had any money to support it (it was Magnolia), she would far and away be the frontrunner in this category. This will likely go to Meryl (snooze) or Sandra (cuts wrists). Thankfully, Carey Mulligan appears to have lost steam.

9:57 EST: Oh, fuck. Sandra Bullock. There are no words.

10:00 EST: Yes, yes, nice speech. But completely, completely undeserved. Just a little anecdote to share -- not saying it's related: I attended a SAG screening of "A Serious Man" a couple weeks back, and a gentleman behind me said to his screening partner that he was going to vote for Sandra Bullock even though he hadn't seen "The Blind Side," using the following rationale: "She's had such a long career, and she's always been good, as opposed to someone who just lucked into it like Precious."

10:01 EST: And Clooney clinches the best moment of the night by implying he's had sex with Betty White. And making the joke "An Education: Based on the Novel 'Push' by Sapphire." Interesting that he's presenting the category that his film was surprisingly snubbed from.

CAST IN A MOTION PICTURE

While Alfred Molina and Rosamund Pike rocked the shit, I generally don't think the ensemble of "An Education" is worthy of winning an award. I also think that, aside from Jeremy Renner, the cast of "The Hurt Locker" has been a bit overvalued. "Nine" -- don't make me laugh. This should go to "Precious" or "Inglourious Basterds," and dare I say, it will go to one of them.

10:02 EST: And it does indeed go to "Inglourious Basterds." I'm very happy about it, but somehow it seems inappropriate for Eli Roth to (again!) be the one accepting the award, considering he gives the worst performance in the film.

10:05 EST: And it's over. Well, to be honest, I enjoyed blogging this more than the actual awards, so I don't how all y'all who were just watching it felt. Either way, whatever the reason, I had fun, hopefully you did too. Now, I'm off to drink in the East Village, and I'll leave you with the following words:

VOTE 'NO' ON SANDRA BULLOCK FOR BEST ACTRESS.