TV @ the Movies: Thelma & Louise Hates Texas. Drag U & Marie Antoinette.

I get many emails asking me to write more frequently about the small screen so I figured I should cave if a tv series really excites me (like Mad Men) but on one condition: it has to reference the movies (or feature a beloved movie actress) or involve awardage. I've highlighted movie-adjacent TV before like pre-fame TV roles or unexpected actress moments. So henceforth, I'll package it in series form. You know how we do here at TFE. If something I happen to catch on television references the movies, I'll feature it on Saturday mornings to thank it for doing so.


Last week on Friday Night Lights Becky fell asleep watching Thelma & Louise and that is... well, I can only suspend so much disbelief and you just don't fall asleep watching that movie. It's awesome -- top ten of the 90s level awesome. But Becky is my least favorite character so whatever. She's a mess and there's no accounting for taste. There's a reason Louise won't drive thru Texas, y'all! She'd rather drive right off a cliff. I can't even discuss falling asleep watching Thelma & Louise without turning red with fury. Inappropriate! Those women deserved better.

So for this edition of "TV @ The Movies" a brief discussion of Drag U instead.

RuPaul's Drag U episode 1.2 "Dateless Divas"
I'm fairly certain this show is not half as good as it could be.

• Qualm #1: a makeover show. Like we needed another one.
  
• Qualm #2: I'm assuming Raven won't be in every episode and when the first Raven-less episode appears, I will feel cheated.
  
• Qualm #3: why isn't the entire panel of judges famous queens like Lady Bunny? I mean to have a "Dean of Dance" and it's not Candis Cayne? That's just wrong!) -- but I love that the underlying message is so subversive: everyone would be better off if they became a drag queen.

Raven: These girls are lucky that they have the advanced technology of the dragulator!
RuPaul: The Dragulator is a highly sophisticated piece of tech-no-lo-gy

Raven was the hottest miss thang on last year's Drag Race (and anyone who coins the phrase "giving Michelle Pfeiffer Bitch" has won me for life.) so I'm happy that she's practically the star of Drag U already. And, of course, Ru's always had a way with hilarious line readings. The Dragulator is awesome. Ru understands the camp value of a low budget (not to mention the power of a catchphrase and cheap gimmick). Anyway, the [sassy head bob] tek•nol•uh•jee suggests that contestant Lenae becomes "Honey Boom" and she likes it.

"I was like, 'That's Marilyn Monroe. And she really is inside of me!'"

It's really more like Chicago's Queen Latifah when Velma's like "Not you too, Mama!?!" in despair of platinum blonde Roxie Mania but never mind. Later Lenae dances to "I'm Every Woman" in this new gold lamé platinum blonde version of herself which confuses the girlie iconography even further Whitney + Queen ≠ Marilyn??? Whaaaa... But I shouldn't doubt the Dragulator because it is to RuPaul what "Magic Screen" was to Pee Wee, yes?


So... eventually Lenae as Honeyboom blows a kiss to the judges with a "Happy Birthday Mr. President" proving once again that Marilyn did it best. More celebrities ought to understand their own image with pinpoint precision and sell it accordingly at public events. If they hope to be remembered 48 years after their death, that is.

Meanwhile Lenae's competitor Debbie is transformed into "Moxie Mayhem" saying

"It's like Memoirs of a Geisha meets Marie Antoinette"

And you know that mash-up sent me reeling... cuz I hate and love in equal measure! [To recap: Memoirs = hate / Marie = love]


'Honeyboom' won the competition but I was the true winner because it got me to thinking about Marie-Antoinette, aka the 'misunderestimated' movie of the Aughts.

Leaping far from the RuPaul's Drag U topic, out of curiousity, I thought I'd check that statement. Nope! Oops. It's almost the most critically hated of my top 50 favorite movies of the Aughts but not quite. These are the least acclaimed of those, according to the TomatoMeter, the only films in my top 50 to not score in the 80% and above of critical approval. These are the places I refused consensus. Not out of contrarianism, mind you, but from pure love of the movies in question.

• Birth (39% on Rotten Tomatoes)
• Marie Antoinette (55% on Rotten Tomatoes)
• I ♥ Huckabees (62% on Rotten Tomatoes )
• Bring It On (64% on Rotten Tomatoes)
  
• Idioterne (The Idiots) (70% on Rotten Tomatoes)
  
• Moulin Rouge (77% on Rotten Tomatoes)
• 25th Hour (78% on Rotten Tomatoes)
  
• Beau Travail (79% on Rotten Tomatoes)

What'cha think about that?
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I Heart Huckabees

Streep Nom #13: Adaptation (2002)

Thirteen wasn't exactly an unlucky number for Meryl Streep. Though she didn't win the Oscar, her thirteenth Oscar honor brought her the title of Most Nominated Actor. It's difficult to imagine anyone ever surpassing her since she's widened the gap considerably since (Jack Nicholson is stalled at 12, tied with Katharine Hepburn and the only other living/working rivals for super frequent Oscar honors Al Pacino and Peter O'Toole are much further behind with 8 nominations each).

<-- Splendor in the grass. Spike directs Streep in Adaptation (2002)

This was also the number that coincided with what was arguably her most challenging big screen role in the Aughts in the Spike Jonze/Charlie Kauffman collaboration Adaptation (2002) and the first time she'd competed as a supporting actress since the 1970s.

Each time I watch Adaptation I seem to have a different reaction to it ranging from wild love to 'stop obsessing over yourself!' annoyance but I've never been less than enthralled with what Meryl's doing as the writer Susan Orlean whether she's playing Orlean herself or some projections of Orlean. And that dial tone reverie may well be Meryl's best screen moment from the Aughts.

The 2002 Nominees were...

• Kathy Bates, About Schmidt
• Queen Latifah, Chicago
• Julianne Moore, The Hours
• Meryl Streep, Adaptation
• Catherine Zeta-Jones, Chicago
  

At the time I was rooting for Zeta-Jones and probably still would (I blame her thrilling rendition of "I Can't Do It Alone") but I could just as easily have voted for Streep had I had an Academy ballot.

Other Women For Context
The big snub here, the one that stung, was Michelle Pfeiffer's scary self-generated cult of personality in White Oleander. She had my vote as best of the year and it stands as one of the three crown jewels of her career (a worthy companion to The Fabulous Baker Boys and Batman Returns). She was SAG nominated but couldn't get past the Chicago juggernaut for an nomination. The Golden Globes, who once loved Michelle wildly, killed her momentum by snubbing her rather inexplicably for what may well be Cameron Diaz's weakest performance in Gangs of New York. That Diaz was in the conversation at all is another reminder of how powerful momentum can be (perceived snubs for Being John Malkovich and Vanilla Sky) and how the pre-ordained "buzz" for a Best Picture contender can have a potent affect on other categories.

The only other women who generated anything like "Nominate her!" discussion that year were Toni Collette (BAFTA Nominee for About a Boy), Patricia Clarkson (NYFCC and NSFC winner for Far From Heaven) and arguably Susan Sarandon (Globe nominee for Igby Goes Down). Though the year had other interesting supporting work from the likes of Samantha Morton (Minority Report), Bebe Neuwirth (Tadpole), Edie Falco (Sunshine State), various French divas (8 Women) and Viola Davis (Solaris), it was basically a seven or eight woman race with Pfeiffer's best work in a decade presumably landing in the dread six spot.

Your feelings on 2002's supporting women?

"Streep @ 60"
Previous Nominations Discussed
78, 79, 81, 82, 83, 85, 87, 88, 90, 95, 98 and 99

"we have 12 vacancies. 12 cabins, 12 links."

<-- poster for The American. I like. Do you?

links
Word Smoker I love this piece on Tangled and its evocations of "tentacle porn".
Some Came Running a piece on Cyrus which is quite a funny if inconsequential movie. Glenn Kenny is so fun to read.
Movie|Line Nicolas Winding Refn (Valhalla Rising) on Wonder Woman and what he'd do with her in a movie. This is a pretty intriguing interview. I would love them to give this project to someone who has an idea, you know. Not just another generic superhero movie.
The Awl proclaims Toy Story 3 "totally bonkers" and the best movie of the year. Good piece
The Wrap I didn't know this: Influential guilds are rallying to have IMDb lose those birthdates, claiming it leads to ageism in a youth-obsessed business.
/Film A Toy Story short coming next year? Oh Christ Almighty. What happened to going out with a bang?

Psycho is 50
I really meant to commemorate it myself but until I do...
WSJ great piece on Psycho (1960) and the Bernard Hermann score
Sunset Gun "50 Years and a Remake Later". I love discovering that cinephiles I respect are also fond of the Gus Van Sant recreation. Throw your stones elsewhere I'm not the least bit embarrassed about it. I like cinematic experimentation.

and here's a YouTube video on shower scene parodies/homages/ripoffs (hat tip to JA)



off-cinema
Sociological Images fun art project visualizing "masculine" images through "feminine" processes. We need more of this since Toy Story 3, though often brilliant, continues Pixar's little boys rule / girlie things not as cool messaging.
Us Magazine Ryan Kwanten is writing a sex guide book. Anyone who has ever watched his sex scenes on True Blood will surely buy it. Best Seller!
Boy Culture Is Queen Latifah softening her stance about coming out?

finally, Rob Will Review top ten Glee performances season 1. But I really must take exception with Kurts coopting of "Rose's Turn" not being on the list. That's just crazy talk.

p.s.
I find it very annoying --and I wonder if any of you have noticed -- that blogger no longer has accurate comment counts. It's very annoying because I read every comment and if it's lying to me about when you're commenting, I might miss some. grrrr.

Let's Put on a Show (Oscar Night Review -Pt 1 of 3)

What's that line from The Age of Innocence? Something about that the audience

wants to get away from amusement even more quickly than they want to get to it.

Excuse me If I've stolen it before. But isn't that the way many of us feel after the Best Picture prize has been handed out. It's like [pantomimes wiping hands] 'That's that! Done. On to next year"

Hugh's opening number. A faux shoestring charm offensive

But I do want to say a few things about what turned out to be a surprisingly fun wrap to the lengthy awards season. This particular season was at turns satisfying (mostly on the acting / awards show side) and unimaginatively monotonous (The world was Slumdogging it from Toronto onwards). I squawked earlier on these pages about the continual leaks that they were going to be messing with the Oscar format. I worried that they didn't care enough about Oscar's true fans, the millions who still tune in every year eager to see favorite annual traditions reenacted. Who wants Christmas without a tree or Thanksgiving without the turkey? If Oscar is your favorite holiday (it's mine. Duh) you want the traditions.

Read the Rest...
Parts 2 (acting presentations) & 3 (fashions) coming tomorrow

Red Carpet Lineup (Awards Show Edition)

It's that time of year. You're probably back at the gym trying to lose the holiday weight gain but the movie stars just get their cardio on red carpets for the next six weeks. So herewith, some gowns from the BFCA show and the People's Choice --and yes it's the last time I'll be mentioning "People's Choice". [sigh] People... they're always making the wrong ones!

images by way of @ JAMD

Anne Hathaway, who is a smart smart girl, was the princess of the ball in white -- she even referenced her Princess Diaries days in her speech. Don't think she doesn't know how much Oscar loves the princesses. Queen Latifah is always fun and Kate Hudson is always (no comment) but I include them to show that the color palette of the People's Choice Awards is very loud as if these mythical united People continually need to see bright colors to stay interested. Ooh, look...Shiny! Meanwhile, the critics and media types at the BFCA are treated to a solemn area of creams, whites, greys and blacks. Coincidence? I think not. Consider Dakota Fanning's color coding...


But back to the line-up.

Diane Lane is hot. I normally think it's silly how people imagine that actors can't handle seeing their husbands and wives kiss other people onscreen. It's such a "well, duh" part of their job who could be offended / jealous over it? It's like marrying a vampire and complaining about the bloodlust. But with Diane Lane and Josh Brolin, I always find myself wondering. When your spouse is married to someone else in the public consciousness (Diane has been romantically entangled with Richard Gere three times onscreen and she presents him with awards and they're always kissy kissy) might that be a little weird?

<-- Bassett in 1995, during her short but great movie peak.

Another weird thing: Angela Bassett's career. I know she's 50 and only actresses named Meryl Streep are allowed regular leading movie roles past that age. But should she really have to settle for running on ER's exhaust fumes? It makes me so crazy. Finally... Angelina Jolie is a goddess. And knows it. Hey, wait a second, why is Anne Hathaway here twice? Answer: She was smart enough to wear a two sided dress. Therefore you must see her from several angles to fully appreciate. Several angles means more air time and more magazine photos. Savvy girl, that one.

Now Playing: Misunderestimated W. Grizzly Bruce and Teenage Dakota... but Rachel is Still Not Getting Married

This weekend's newbies from least to most screens (links go to trailers)

Filth & Wisdom -Madonna directs this racy film about up and coming creative types moonlighting as sex workers of sorts. Featuring the band Gogol Bordello
<--- What Just Happened -An insider comedy about Hollywood. Hollywood never tires of making these. Audiences never tire of ignoring them. Starring: Robert De Niro, Robin Wright Penn, Catherine Keener and Bruce Willis as a fat bearded version of himself. Mmmm, Bruce Willis
Morning Light billed as a "true life documentary" --are there other kinds? I'm confused. It's a heartwarming Disney film about a Disney sponsored sailing event. Awwww

The Secret Life of Bees ---> Queen Latifah headlines an all-star cast in the story about a girl on the run (Dakota Fanning is a teenager. My how time flies...) and the black sisterhood that takes her in in 1960s South Carolina
W. Once Oscar beloved Oliver Stone directs his third presidential-focused film. Can it measure up in any way to Nixon and JFK?
Sex Drive virgin teenager trying to lose it. How mindblowingly original! The trailer tries to entice me with a little Jimmy Marsden but I ain't falling for it, not even for the man with the cheshire grin
Max Payne is NOT the sequel to Constantine. Believe it or not! I'm still having trouble believing it due to the trailer. Anyway... Keanu does not appear but freaky slightly angelic/demonic entities due. Mark Wahlberg is the star of this video game adaptation

<--- Unfortunately for many of you they're still totally withholding Rachel Getting Married. Not sure why they're not trickling it wider... I hope they don't miss their window like Vicky Cristina Barcelona seemed to by waiting for its fourth weekend to add any screens and then only a couple dozen extras. It seemed to peak a week earlier (which was a holiday weekend --what were they thinking?). It looked for a moment like the fourgy romantic comedy would beat Match Point in Woody's box office hierarchy but now it's going to fall short. They should've been more aggressive, I tell you. This comparison is riddled with problems as Match Point never went as wide as Vicky did and Rachel is still 600+ screens shy of how Vicky opened. Never mind. Ignore the crazy person typing at you! It's just that he worries excessively about middling box office for movies made for adults that don't contain explosions, firearms or supernatural creatures...
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What are you seeing this weekend?
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I Don't Care if You Think I'm Link

This Recording "in which it's really human of you to listen to all my bullshit" ... fun piece on 80s teen movies and geeky romance
i09 has the twitter feeds you must follow. The 'Michael Bay' excerpt is priceless
Big Picture negative / mixed reviews of W.
NYT I love this chart on Presidential Physique. Does Obama's slender frame work against or for him?
Trading Faces has a good solid piece on the most recent Presidential debate
Boy Culture delivers the most detailed review of Madonna's Sticky & Sweet you'll find. Even though it's very personal I agree with so much of it I'm not going to write a word about the tour. Plus, well: film blog (mostly) ... I'm trying to stay on topic ;)
Lazy Evil Eye Theater "the only thing more terrifying than the last 12 words of this post are the first 206!" -Piper is having so much witty fun with his rechristened blog!
Out1 Film Journal James doesn't believe in multiple film festival posts. He's going to tell you everything in one NYFF post that rivals Che in length
Coming Soon The Oscars are going to allow film commercials this year. WHAT? Why am I so averse to change with my Oscars?
Out in Hollywood Queen Latifah's latest 'I don't care if you think i'm gay' proclamation
Playbill Liza Minelli is returning to Broadway. "And the My World Goes Round"...
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Queen LaLinkah

Defamer Pretend to look surprised. Is Queen Latifah really about to come out?
"Of Interest" Draco Malfoy and Nicole Kidman
The Hot Blog Poland hates to be a dick -- but y'ar Blanche, y'ar. Why else would you imply that you can recommend a certain movie only to girls and "some boys" and then say it's not all that. The implications... oy
Dennis Cozzalio's "faces I love" column. Interesting look at actors
Empire Ridley Scott to take on the Gucci empire? What a glitzy art directed biopic that could be
NewNowNext Katharine Heigl thinks Knocked Up is "a little sexist" ... maybe I should reconsider a little Katharine Heigl

Yahoo has the first five minutes of The Golden Compass online. The "first (however many) minutes" movement in web sneaks is a good one I think, but it's not for every film. I'm not sure this will help this particular movie, since there's lots of exposition you have to get through early on. I remember when Dune came out in the 80s (god I'm old. sigh) and when I arrived at the theater (I had never read the book) they actually passed out a glossary sheet of terms you should know from the books. I was worried immediately... "I have to study before it starts?!?" The Golden Compass, I fear, might be impenetrable to newbies.

Random Movie Notes on TV's Emmy Nominations

I really should get TIVO or something akin to it. Still wouldn't make me a television aficionado but if the good stuff was all presented in an easy to digest 'on my time' format I might become less allergic and more complimentary. And then I could bitch about the Emmys with more authoritah. @ Zoom In I looked at the top six categories but here on this movie blog, let's look at movie actors who made the cut slumming (I know I'm not supposed to call it that anymore but it's fun to see TV faces go red) and a few other random notes

ACTOR, DRAMA SERIES
James Spader, "Boston Legal," ABC
Kiefer Sutherland, "24," Fox

Spader and Sutherland have essentially given up their movie careers. I don't miss them. Spader always skeeved me out in the movies. Yes, he was often hired to do just that but he was an overachiever if you ask me... The only time I ever loved him Spader was in sex, lies and videotape (1989) wherein the skeeviness served but didn't overpower the character. The rest of that movie was damn good, too.

ACTRESS, DRAMA SERIES:
Kyra Sedgwick, "The Closer," TNT
Sally Field, "Brothers and Sisters," ABC
Minnie Driver, "The Riches," FX Network
Patricia Arquette, "Medium," NBC

If TV could be applauded for one thing it should be this: it gives movie B listers meatier character than they're ever going to get offered on film and it gives former big screen A listers a second shot at mass adulation once they've passed the half century mark.

ACTOR, COMEDY SERIES:
Alec Baldwin, "30 Rock," NBC
Charlie Sheen, "Two and a Half Men," CBS

Alec Baldwin just gets better and better as an actor, doesn't he? His talent is aging well. There's a reason why Charlie Sheen's career never really took off on the big screen. There's NO reason why it should on the small screen either. What the hell is going on with Emmy's love for this series?

SUPPORTING ACTRESS, DRAMA SERIES:
Lorraine Bracco, "The Sopranos," HBO
SUPPORTING ACTRESS, COMEDY SERIES:
Elizabeth Perkins, "Weeds," Showtime

Remember when Bracco and Perkins were scene stealers in the movies instead of on TV? Yeah, the memory is fuzzy for me, too.

ACTOR, MINISERIES OR A MOVIE:
Robert Duvall, "Broken Trail," AMC
Jim Broadbent, "Longford," HBO
ACTRESS, MINISERIES OR A MOVIE:
Queen Latifah, "Life Support," HBO
Helen Mirren, "Prime Suspect: The Final Act (Masterpiece Theatre)," PBS

Oscar winning Duvall is kind of a workaholic isn't he?
Oscar winning Broadbent needs another plum movie role stat. 2001... (sigh) good times.
Oscar winning Mirren could easily pick up yet more trophies in 2007
Oscar nominee Latifah... here's my thing with the (other) Queen: I adore her as a celebrity but I wish she would try a little harder as an actress. I often feel she's coasting on general charisma and pleasantness (of which she has plenty). "Motormouth Maybelle" for instance in Hairspray. Shouldn't that character have been played with more gusto?

SUPPORTING ACTRESS, MINISERIES OR A MOVIE:
Greta Scacchi, "Broken Trail," AMC
Anna Paquin , " Bury My Heart At Wounded Knee," HBO
Samantha Morton, "Longford," HBO
Judy Davis, "The Starter Wife," USA
Toni Collette, "Tsunami, The Aftermath," HBO

This is the silveriest (er...?) screen category for Emmy night even if none of them are "movie stars" per se. They've got buckets of talent between them not to mention 1 Oscar and 5 more nominations.

SUPPORTING ACTOR, MINISERIES OR A MOVIE:
Aidan Quinn, " Bury My Heart At Wounded Knee," HBO

Aidan was always thisclose to becoming a huge star. So TV should embrace him. Or rather he should embrace TV. Someone get him an excellent dramatic series role.

GUEST ACTOR IN A COMEDY SERIES:
Martin Landau, "Entourage," HBO
Sir Ian McKellen, "Extras," HBO
Stanley Tucci, "Monk," USA
Giovanni Ribisi, "My Name Is Earl," NBC
GUEST ACTOR IN A DRAMA SERIES:
Forest Whitaker, "ER," NBC
David Morse, "House," Fox
GUEST ACTRESS IN A COMEDY SERIES:
Salma Hayek, "Ugly Betty," ABC
GUEST ACTRESS IN A DRAMA SERIES:
Marcia Gay Harden, "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit," NBC
Leslie Caron, "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit," NBC

The "guest" categories at the Emmys always get a lot of flack for their star-f***ing tendencies. There is so much television and so many hours of each series to fill with guest actors that it's difficult to determine how well they're doing in this realm. Maybe they're f***in the wrong stars. Maybe not. I wouldn't know.

INDIVIDUAL PERFORMANCE IN A VARIETY OR MUSIC PROGRAM:
Ellen Degeneres, "79th Annual Academy Awards," ABC

I hope they bring her back next year, don't you?

MAKEUP FOR A MINISERIES, MOVIE OR SPECIAL (NON-PROSTHETIC):
PROSTHETIC MAKEUP FOR A SERIES, MINISERIES, MOVIE OR A SPECIAL:
STUNT COORDINATION:

I bitch about the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences a lot but in this particular way they are very smart: technical categories. You have to divide up makeup achievements --otherwise as Oscar voters prove, only prosthetic work is deemed noteworthy. Oscar should have two categories. And Oscar should have a stunt category.

ORIGINAL MUSIC AND LYRICS:
"Family Guy, Peter's Two Dads," Song Title: "My Drunken Irish Dad," Fox
"MADtv, Episode 1209," Song Title: "Merry Ex-Mas," Fox
"Saturday Night Live, Host: Justin Timberlake," Song Title: "Dick In A Box," NBC
"Scrubs, My Musical," Song Title: "Everything Comes Down to Poo," NBC
"Scrubs, My Musical," Song Title: "Guy Love," NBC

Of these songs I've only heard "Dick in a Box" but I'm willing to bet that this lineup is as good as Oscar's choices in any given year in the frequently ear bleeding category.

NONFICTION SERIES:
"Inside the Actors Studio," Bravo

I've said it before. I'll say it again: brilliant concept, boring (drooling) execution. Decide if you're a tribute / toast show or a real examination of the actors craft. It doesn't work to pretend that that's the same thing.

More Emmy Chatter:
Full list of the Emmy Nominations @ The Envelope
Top category brief thoughts @ Zoom In
Emmy Nominee Reactions from Defamer
Co-miserate with ModFab and Low Resolution

Hairspray's Original Songs

Those three of you interested in the "Original Song" Oscar category --arguably the Academy's strangest category: song writing is a skill worthy of the movie industry's highest award but casting and stuntwork are not (?) --should take note: Hairspray's soundtrack listing shows three songs that weren't in the Broadway show. Only one song, "The Big Dollhouse", has been cut. It was a comedic number sung in prison by Tracey Turnblad (the hero), her mother Edna and various other female characters. Contrary to original rumors there's no new song for villainess Velma Von Tussle (Michelle Pfeiffer) though her equally evil daughter Amber (Brittany Snow) gets one, "The New Girl in Town". This leaves Pfeiffer with the Broadway show's least successful song "(The Legend of) Miss Baltimore Crabs" --the tune is weak and applause was limp the night I saw it on Broadway --the other songs tended to provoke berserk applause.

The other two new songs have gone to Tracey's beau Link (Zac Ephron) who gets a ditty called "Ladies Choice" and there's a group number led by Motormouth Maybelle (Queen Latifah) "Come So Far (Got So Far To Go)" Maybelle already has one inspirational tune. Now she'll have two? Seems like overkill... especially when you stop to consider that another new song "I Can Wait" written for Tracey has been cut from the film and the CD. Essentially the important supporting players have been given an extra number but there's no new songs for either the heroine or villain. I've listed the characters in rough descending order of their importance to the show and in parenthesis their number of solos/duet or group songs. Tracey Turnblad -Nikki Blonsky (2/5), Edna Turnblad -John Travolta (0/3), Link Larkin -Zac Ephron (2/3), Amber Von Tussle -Brittany Snow (1/0), Velma Von Tussle -Michelle Pfeiffer (1/1), Motormouth Maybelle -Queen Latifah (2/2), Wilbur Turnblad -Christopher Walken (0/1), Penny Pingleton -Amanda Bynes (0/2), Seaweed -Elijah Kelley (1/3) and Corny Collins -James Marsden (2/0). Alison Janney plays Penny's hysterical conservative mother (one variation on a stock character in John Waters ouevre) Prudy Pingleton but she has no songs.


The coolest track of the CD is likely to be "Mama I'm a Big Girl Now" given that it features three Traceys: the original Ricki Lake (from John Waters classic 1988 comedy) Marisa Jaret Winokur (a TONY winner for creating Broadway's Tracey) and this film's debuting big girl Nikki Blonsky. What does that mean? I'm guessing that it's been cut from the narrative and it's the closing credits song. But still, that's a potentially awesome number and a nice tribute to Hairspray's long journey from wonderful cult comedy to moneyed mainstream musical.

Oprah Loooooves Hairspray. Michelle Still Hates Interviews

Sometimes you see something that sets off so many different feelings in you that you don't even know where to begin. Such was the experience of watching Oprah's gushfest with the cast of Hairspray last week. She gushed so much I feared she would be rushed to County General for dehydration treatment.

She didn't just love the movie. She loooooooovvvvveed it. She loved it with several exclamation points. Either that or she owns stock in it. See for yourself...

Oprahcrazed

I rarely watch Oprah but now I understand why Tom Cruise was jumping on couches. I thought she might be impersonating Arsenio Hall what with all the artificial whooping. John Travolta, a close personal friend of Oprah... and she wants you to know it, charmed the crowd and himself. He loves the accent he created for Edna Turnblad. He loves it so much that even after spending an inordinate amount of time talking about it, he brought it up again after the commercial break. Unfortunately one of Edna's most famous lines --the one about her diet pills wearing off --is almost unintelligible under the affected Baltimorean. I love what he says about the difficulties of musicals, that's a smart answer. But when he's talking about the accent all I can think of is the scene in Waiting for Guffman where Corky St. Clair tries an accent on for size.

Oprahtravolta

Based on the scenes shown we know Hairspray is colorful and bouncy. It looks like a lot of fun if suspiciously frantic in proving itself so (breathe a tentative sigh of relief). Musical comedy works best when you can't feel the heavy lifting. Hopefully the fatsuits, accents, wigs, and uneven score won't cause the talent to sweat.

Following Travolta was Michelle Pfeiffer. Ahem. After my heart stopped pounding (SO good to see her again. It's been years) I started giggling and feeling for her. She still hates to be interviewed. She hates it with exclamation points. She is one of the great movie stars but when it comes to playing herself? That aint her forte. She can't form sentences. She doesn't want to answer questions. She was not made for forced patter. My mind lept back to her very uncomfortable interview with Barbara Walters back in the day. It was chilly in there. And here on Oprah, sandwiched between the eager to please Travolta and the warm charisma of Queen Latifah, the temperature dropped a bit, too.

Here is the Michelle portion plus a bit o' Queen and Nikki Blonsky.

Oprahmichelle

My favorite part is the last bit. Oprah realizes Michelle has been quiet and no one has been addressing her and she tries for an olive branch. The response is the most relaxed Pfeiffer gets. "Someone has to play the villain."

Indeed.

They're beating the drums early for this potential crowd pleaser, aren't they? It doesn't open until July 20th and it got a full hour on Oprah two months prior. That's a lot of time to fluff some cotton candy. It better be sweet.
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Keep Your Enemies Close

IMDB brings us the news regarding Beelzebub's Hilary Swank's next movie project, Freedom Writers. The first half of this news was already known to me --they say to keep your friends close and your enemies closer, so I watch Persephone Mrs. Chad Lowe's every move. But the second part, the casting of Imelda Staunton in a supporting role, is new. This is rather like asking Toni Collette to 'support' Nia Vardalos in Connie & Carla last year. I just aint having this world where the former is a lesser star than the latter. Stop the world I want to get off.

Freedom Writers will be directed by Richard LaGravanese, who first rose to fame for his terrific Oscar-nominated screenplay The Fisher King (1991). He has only directed one fiction feature previously. That was the criminally undervalued Living out Loud (1998) which features an amazing awards-ignored central performance from Holly Hunter and the first real inkling that Queen Latifah was the kind of actress that would eventually end up Oscar-nominated. You know the kind: warm, easy to root for, engaging.

But back to Imelda & Hilary... Recount! The 2004 Best Actress race will never cease to haunt. What a world. What a world.