Friday, April 17, 2009

Three Things That May Prevent You From Self-Harm Should You Be Subjected To 17 Again

Hello there, folks. This is Dave from Victim of the Time, and apparently I'm supposed to be writing things here. If you're one of the five people who read my blog, you'll know I tend... not to write things. Not very often anyway. So, you know, this is an odd experience for me.

Your widest new release there across the pond (I'm British, by the way, so it you see any 'u's popping up in places you don't expect it's because I'm here to tell you the right way to spell things) this weekend is 17 Again, starring that Disney personage commonly known as Zac Efron. I'm sure usually on this blog this would be dismissed with a paltry paragraph somewhere or other, but because I am the 'yoof' (youth) in this establishment I've decided to act my age for once and talk about movies I'm supposed to like. Also, by some weird circumstance, 17 Again was released here last week, while State of Play (your other main option) isn't released until next week, so basically you'll just have to learn to deal.

If you're going to be seeing 17 Again this weekend, I'd guess it's for one of two reasons. Reason one: you love, worship and lust after Zac Efron, and whatever anyone says you will be seeing this film and you couldn't give a crap about what the film itself is actually like. To those people, I recommend getting something to gag yourselves with during the 'leather jacket' scene, just in case people think that mice have invaded the theatre. But otherwise, you can move on, because I'm not talking to you.

Reason two: you have a friend/partner/child who loves, worships and lusts after Zac Efron and you're being roped into seeing it with them, even though the mere thought of Zac Efron makes your skin crawl. You may be crazy (yes, I'll admit to having the tiniest of crushes on the boy man), but have no fear! Here are three things that will make the painful experience just about bearable.

1. Zac Efron Leslie Mann. Look at Miss Mann's filmography and its tininess is quite surprising. This can probably be put down to her larger-than-life appearances in some of her husband Judd Apatow's school-of-comedy films, most notably Knocked Up, in which she was Paul Rudd's long-suffering wife. In 17 Again, she is Matthew Perry's long-suffering wife. However, since Perry is the man who reverts to being Efron, Mann gets quite a bit of possibly-illegal lusting to do. She doesn't get a lot of the comedy- which is quite thin on the ground in any case- but her natural warmth and charisma as an increasingly confused woman is the most enjoyable part of the film, and should stop you from clawing your own eyes out.

Leslie Mann and Nicole Sullivan in 17 Again

2. Nicole Sullivan. This is potentially a point of debatable validity because she's hardly in the film at all (as Mann's best friend), but Sullivan- mostly a TV actress, who I recognised from Scrubs- has a wonderfully biting presence and will be shot in the arm you might be needing as Efron starts preaching about the wonders of abstinence.

3. A geeky subplot. I said the comedy was few and far between, but it may get to the point where you'll take whatever you can get, so the subplot concerning Perry/Efron's adult best friend Ned's pursuance of his friend's new headmistress does provide a few chuckles here and there. Although there is the possibility that Ned may make your scratching fingernails dig even deeper into your eyeballs, so perhaps feigning illness is the way to go after all.

So, basically, if you are being forced to see this, I just hope you like Leslie Mann. Good luck!

14 comments:

Dame James Henry said...

Magnificent post! I am going to see 17 Again for reason number 1. Twice, actually. I'm a bit obsessed, what can I say?

Now that I think about it, I've seen all three of Zac's main theatrical releases (Hairspray, HSM3 and now 17 Again) twice in the theatres. I think I many have a problem.

Walter L. Hollmann said...

I will see 17 Again because of my love for the Zac, I admit it. It's not a lusty thing, I really consider him to be a really good actor. Always nails the tone, is clearly smart about what he's doing, delightfully charming. I can't wait for more Zac Efron movies.

E said...

I'd never wath a Zac Efron's movie (ok, I saw Hairpsray, but not for him) unless he shows up in scen completely naked and preferrably with an erection pointing his penis to my eyes, jacing off and cumming (yum!).

Saltire Flower said...

I'm watching this for Efron. I should be ashamed to write that, but SNL turned me over to the dark side.

Glenn said...

Wow, that's How to Deal thing of mine has been linked twice in the same day by different people. How incredibly odd. I guess I'll just have to be like Mandy Moore and learn how to deal.

J.D. said...

I can't stop staring at that picture of Zac you posted. So there's MY answer!

Wayne B. said...

LESLIE MANN + NICOLE SULLIVAN = THE FUNNY

Dave - I've never understood why US insists on spelling words like favourite and colour without the "u." It just looks ... not right. Oh well, to each to his own.

Rawfish said...

I actually quite like Zac Efron. He's definitely the best actor out of his Disney clique. He was decent in Hairspray and surprisingly effective in Me and Orson Welles.

Isn't he getting good reviews for 17 Again? (not the film but Efron the actor) People give him too much a hard time for being a teenage heartthrob, but that's hardly his fault.

Dave said...

Glenn: That is indeed very odd. But did Mandy Moore suffer for nothing? No she did not. Her learned wisdom must be spread.

Wayne: We did it first, therefore we did it better.

And to those praising Zac's acting abilities: I agree. But some people are apparently blind to this possibility.

Glenn said...

Indeed. Did she wear her grandmother's hat for NOTHING?

John T said...

It's funny that all of these Mandy Moore mentions have been popping up everywhere, because I actually saw her on Wednesday.

Paul Outlaw said...

I would go see this for Thomas Lennon and Melora Hardin (the geeeky subplot). Lennon can do no wrong in my opinion. And Hardin is mah-velous.

Anonymous said...

Argh.. Zac Efron. For some reason he reminds me of Tom Cruise.

......

Karen said...

I'll be seeing this movie later on today. Hopefully it goes well.