Sunday, September 20, 2009

Emmy Live Blogging: The Swine Flu Edition (Pt 1)

refresh your screen regularly

7:00
You guys. I am a mess. Can't shake this flu... two weeks now of S-I-C-K. I'm not sure how this live-blogging will go. Perhaps I'll only comment should a red carpet moment or acceptance speech rouse me from my feverish stupor? We'll see. As if to add insult to injury, the Boyfriend forced me to watch a whole episode of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit before flipping to the red carpet arrivals. I don't mean to spoil the episode for you but the bad guys all confessed and the libidinous were punished for their evil sex drives! An innocent escort's (he wasn't the perp) face was disfigured by the end of the episode and all was right with the world. My favorite quote from the episode
I knew if they had the chance, they would ravage me. I told Gary. It made him wild... an animal!
I hope Mariska wins tonight. It's so genius the way she waits till the other actors are done reciting their exposition before she recites her own exposition. Brilliance! [/sarcasm]

7:15 Jon Stewart is talking but he's just wearing a tux (men are so boring) so here's a picture of Damages "supporting" actress, Rose "I have more screentime than Glenn Close!" Byrne wearing a dress that I swore 17 people wore to the 2002 SAG awards. Champagne. I thought Rose was excellent in the indie Dead Girl but after the fact I realize that I just loved her in that because her patented miserabilism is only interesting in very small doses. She's like the television version of mopey Jennifer Connelly.

7:25 They just showed a commercial for Coco Before Chanel. When I hear Alessandro Nivola speaking French I'm totally Gomez on Morticia. Hot!, or rather, Chaud.

7:39 Ryan Seacrest to Two and a Half Men's Jon Cryer. "Your show is very provocative." Um... Is English Ryan Seacrest's second language?

7:53 I don't recognize half of these TV people. Where are the movie stars? My mind keeps flashing back to Julia Louis-Dreyfus's purse. DON'T OPEN IT, JULIA!


It's like her very own Lament Configuration. Julia Louis Dreyfus is Hellraiser!

8:05 Neil Patrick Harris is the man. People should not be allowed to host awards shows unless they can sing as well as NPH or dance as joyously as Ellen.


8:14 YAY! The cutest person in the universe Kristin Chenoweth wins Best Supporting Actress for Pushing Daisies. Squeaks her way through some sort of acceptance speech. So very deserved. It was apparently Amy Poehler's idea for all the nominees to wear glasses. Poehler is love. Did you see the gay penguins episode of Parks and Recreation?

8:25 Jon Cryer wins Best Supporting Actor for Two and a Half Men. That's provocative! And also, stupid. His acceptance speech is funny but it's so annoying that Neil Patrick Harris lost again. I wanted him to kiss David Burtka on live television. I've seen Burtka in two plays and he's talented, too.

8:37 Toni Collette wins Best Actress in a Comedy Series for The United States of Tara. I would like to scream "triple crown here she comes" but then I was forced to remember that she did not win the Tony when she did Wild Party, damnit. So really. She just has this one statue. But she deserves as many as Tara has personalities. You know she does.

8:49 Rob Lowe is making a joke about how he makes bad career decisions. This would be funny except that, you know, if you're still famous 25 years after pretending to sleep with your pretend sister Jodie Foster, you're doing something right.

8:53 Alec Baldwin wins Best Actor in a Comedy for 30Rock.

8:56 If we wanted dance routines on an awards show we would have called Debbie Allen. This is not helping my flu. If I didn't already feel sick, the combination of Jon Cryer and Hayden Panetierre as presenters would have convinced me to start coughing up phlegm.

New post. PART TWO
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36 comments:

NicksFlickPicks said...

I already love this live-blog.

Ryan T. said...

Feel better! I had my own bout of maybe-swine-flu two weeks ago. It was the anti-fun.

Seeing the cast of HIMYM has been the only real highlight of the red carpet for me. Alyson Hannigan and Neil Patrick Harris both look gorgeous.

Esther said...

1. Get better soon!

2. I loved Allesandro Nivola in Junebug.

3. I met Neil Patrick Harris at Waiting for Godot the day before he hosted the Tonys. He'd been to the play and went backstage afterward. he told all of us at the stage door that he'd sign autographs when he came out. And he did! He is very gracious, friendly and approachable. And cute.

adelutza said...

I had no idea John Krasinski is engaged to Emily Blunt. Should watch more TV

NATHANIEL R said...

and what's his name is engaged to Anna Paquin. that doesn't seem that common that television co-stars get together. Talk about never taking a break from each other.

Ryan T. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ryan T. said...

Don't forget Michael C. Hall who is married to his co-star in Dexter. And they play brother and sister on the show!

NicksFlickPicks said...

Anna Paquin is not engaged. She is eleven years old and stuck with her willfully mute mother in the New Zealand bush. Everyone knows this.

adelutza said...

@NicksFlickPicks - I know!! When did all this happen??

NATHANIEL R said...

Yes, how is Stephen Moyer not in prison?

Andrew: Encore Entertainment said...

I'm with Nick...already loving this live-blogging. By the way Nathaniel, if you're going to put sarcasm bold it...Because I read this

I hope Mariska wins tonight. It's so genius the way she waits till the other actors are done reciting their exposition before she recites her own exposition. Brilliance! [/sarcasm]

missing the sarcasm tip at the end and started thinking that you were really on your deathbed and going delirious.

NoNo said...

Loved the glasses bit especially with vanessa williams staying in her miranda character!

John T said...

So, is everyone betting on whether Vanessa Williams really said no, or was that part of the act?

rosengje said...

I love when the winners actually seem excited about winning. There are so many repeat nominees at the Emmy's that the ceremony can often seem perfunctory, so Chenoweth was a delightful breath of fresh air.

Loved the gay penguins! I think the Parks and Recreations writers definitely have a better grasp on Amy Poehler's character this season.

Ryan said...

HOW did Jon Cryer win?? I'm so disappointed with this telecast already. No Wiig or Krakowski win either?

Loved the gay penguin episode too!

Douglas Racso said...

im live blogging as well..... I hope 2 and a half men does not win anything other than what they have already...

Univarn said...

I like Jon Cryer but I think the NPH should have one, heck he's the only one of the entire nominees whose initials demand attention.

Matt said...

Woah... Fey lost to Collette!!

Jorge Rodrigues said...

Triple Crown for Colette? But she hasn't won an Oscar as well...

brandz said...

the most beautiful tonight were jessica lange and christina applegate. just wow!

NATHANIEL R said...

the gay penguins episode was so funny.

but watching it i just kept thinking about how i would love it if How I Met Your Mother did not have a laugh track. I think laugh tracks make shows less funny... because i'm constantly being prodded to laugh. Some jokes are only worth smiling about and smiling is just fine. As long as you laugh a few times during a half hour episode it's worth it.

Nick M. said...

I'm really annoyed that Family Guy was nominated, not just because it's a terribly tiresome show, but because I now have to endure painful clips of the show.

Um, and "stars" are dancing now? I'm sorry, NPH, but I will have to deny your desperate plea for me not to "touch that dial."

Ryan said...

Totally agree about Family Guy. Other shows are more deserving of the nomination. 50 years of non-animated Comedy nominees and they finally choose Family Guy?

Mike said...

So happy for Kristin Chenoweth. She's an Oscar away from being a triple crowner herself. I don't see that happening, though. What kind of role could get her an Oscar? I'm guessing some kind of scene stealing supporting role in a critically acclaimed comedy. Got any ideas=

Jorge Rodrigues said...

LOVE what you said about Hayden Toddlertiere and Jon McCryer...

brandz said...

yay, jessica lange! wee deserved.

Ryan said...

So I guess Lange is now close to being a triple-crowner? Unless she has a Tony but I don't think she does

brandz said...

yay, jessica lange! well deserved.

NATHANIEL R said...

Jessica does not have a TONY, NO

Ryan said...

Haha you sound angry...

Douglas Racso said...

patricia arquette looks like a bitchy snob

seanisbored said...

TONI!!!!

p.s best live-blog ever. fucking hilarious.

Wayne B. said...

"But she deserves as many as Tara has personalities. You know she does." Oh so true, I'm so happy that she and Shohreh Aghdashloo won.

So now Kristen Chenoweth is only one statue away from becoming a Triple Crowner. Which will come first: a Grammy or an Oscar? Woody Allen needs to write a role for this woman pronto!

adam k. said...

OK seriously I have to say it: all this triple crown talk is getting way out of hand. Not everyone who wins an Emmy is gonna be a triple crowner.

This is just a general comment directed at the general obsession with triple crowning at work this year.

Anonymous said...

True, not everyone who wins an emmy will be a triple crowner. But this year there are quite a few ladies who, because of the Emmys they won last night, are only one award away.

Kristin Chenoweth - Tony & Emmy (missing Oscar)
Jessica Lange - Emmy & Oscar (missing Tony)
Cherry Jones - Tony & Emmy (missing Oscar)

rakeback said...

Kristen Chenowith is a very beautiful and talented actress and extremely deserving of winning the Emmy!