Wednesday, June 16, 2010

La la la la la la, Smurf the whole link long.

/Film a remake of Citizen Kane? This satiric trailer savages our cinema today.
popbytes Hugh Jackman trains giant robots to box in Real Steel. This sounds so terrible that I desperately want it to be a Bad Movie We Love.
USA Today first look at The Smurfs (speaking of bad movies waiting to happen)
Movie|Line alerts us to a new Chen Chang movie on DVD called Parking. We love Chen Chang.
Towleroad something for the prurient among you: Kellan Lutz costume fitting for The Immortals.

CHUD & The Flick Filosopher are worried about movie geek tastes becoming so dull and unadventurous. What's happened? It's simple. Everyone became a geek. And once something's mainstream...
Silly Hats Only hosted a White Elephant blog-a-thon yesterday. Participating blogs gifted each other with odd movies to write about. See the results.
Low Resolution "She Should Work More Vol XXVI: Amy Madigan" Well stated, Joe. She should. My guess is she's not "soft" enough for what Hollywood wants even in "hard" women.
Broadway Buzz under the 'life is unfair' umbrella add: I missed this Sutton Foster show. Why must I love artforms that are beyond my socioeconomic reach?
Tabloid Prodigy an oral history of Showgirls. Heh. You said 'oral'.
popbytes Taylor Lautner wants to model his career on Tom Cruise's huh. I have a number of problems with this and they are 1) Tom Cruise 2) a role model??? 3) Didn't Taylor want to be Matt Damon last year? Make up your mind!
The Fug Girls commemorate the most awkward moment (ScarJo + Liev Schreiber and Ryan Reynolds) we saw at the Tony Awards with their infallible lip reading skills.
Movie Addict a radio discussion of the funniest movie actresses of all time. The assembled panel is a wide mix of age ranges and the list they come up with stretches over the decades too all the way from Myrna Loy (who gets a ton of love) through Madeline Kahn and on to newbies like Tina Fey. Fey as an all time movie actress? Er... I love Fey but she's very TV. Not that there's anything wrong with that. If you ask me, though, a list without Carole Lombard in the upper rungs is insanity!

Finally if you choose to click on this link, a warning. "Now a warning?" That link will take you to the most horrifying thing you will have seen in weeks months. It's like Nathaniel's nightmare film world, visualized. Proceed at your own risk.
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11 comments:

billybil said...

Oh My God!!! You're right - your last link has scared me for life and will make horrible nightmares lurk in my head tonight! For shame!!!!

The Know Nothing Know it All said...

Call me an optimist, but I can think of worst performers with whom to infuse my Netflix queue. At least with Cage, you still get a few gems like "Adaptation," "Moonstruck," "Leaving Las Vegas," and the interesting "Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans."

SwankFlix, for instance? Terrifying if only because it means that I have to watch "PS I Love You," again.

BeyonceFlix? I doubt "Carmen: A Hip-Hopera" is better than I remember. The good news is that this one would come well before that (I'm sure will be) horrible remake of "A Star is Born" that's coming down the pipe.

Iggy said...

Good Lord, Kellan Lutz!! I don't know if I've seen any of his movies, but he should wear that outfit in all of them. I want to see him getting out of a car, Paris Hilton style, wearing that.
It's funny there're so many comments saying that seeing him smoking kills everything. Yes, right. I'd go back to smoking again if necessary ;) Well, not really, but almost.
It must be that summer is coming, because I even find Tom Cruise in tight jeans hot.

NATHANIEL R said...

iggy -- the lusty month of may is already over!

the know nothing -- oh you have to go and be rational about it?!? ;) it's not the presence of gems. It's the proportionality of them. They are but a teensy sliver of the worst tasting pie chart of a filmography

Runs Like A Gay said...

The last link would only be a horrible nightmare if it doesn't just add all Cage movies to your Netflix queue but also deletes everything else and then only allows you to get those films in rotation. Can you imagine flicking through a continuous loop of Bangkok Dangerous and Ghost Rider?

I've got to agree with the commenters on Towelroad. I don't mind that Lutz smokes, they're his lungs he can decorate them any way he likes, but isn't it a bit rude that he's having a fag and texting a mate whilst some poor girl is drifting around his midsection dealing with his costume.

/3rtfu11 said...

Nice Showgirls read. Knowing it was all Paul’s fault, although he didn’t write the script nor ask for re-writes; he just went full speed ahead with giving the world the most audacious movie he could muster.

okinawaassault said...

Liev > Ryan. That's all I can contribute to this conversation right now.

Amy said...

Oh, Rabbit Hole, Rabbit Hole, where art thou, Rabbit Hole?

Payday loans said...

Wow,nice, one of the best read posts so far.

Wild Celtic said...

The link, very funny. Smurf is a noun, verb, and adjective.

Go smurf yourself. Smurfs like to smurf a lot. Your dress is just smurftastic! Smurf you.

Ha, that's entertaining. (and try getting that la la la la la la song out of your head...hard to!)

Janice said...

Appreciated the Low Resolution article - I've said the same thing about Madigan many a time, right here in these comments in fact.