Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Actors on Actors: "The Susan Hayward of it All"

Actors on Actors looks at screen moments when stars are name-checked... by other stars! It's very meta. Since we're multi-tasking today trying to catch up, it's also a Tuesday Top Ten! In this episode, a scene from My Best Friend's Wedding (1997)


Julia Roberts: I have big plans for dancing. Just give me 30-35 years."
Rupert Everett [the voice on that ginormous cel phone]: The misery. The exquisite tragedy. The Susan Hayward of it all!"
The umimpeachably witty Mr. Everett (aided by that film's wonderful screenplay from Ronald Bass) is, of course, referring to the grand high priestess of exclamatory drama, Miss "I Want to Live!" Herself. It's not just those curtain-chewing performances, the desperate women she played or the trashy films but the gleefully histrionic taglines, too.

For no reason other than that I plan to live my life with exclamation points this week...

10 Best Taglines from Susan Hayward Films
 (We really should do like a Hayward tribute week at some point.)




10 "She made good - with a plunging neckline, and the morale of a tigress"
from I Can Get it For You Wholesale (1951)

09
"LOVE-WRECKED!"
from Smash-Up: The Story of a Woman! (1963)

08
"They branded her "Adulteress"!
from The President's Lady (1953)


07
"HARD-MUSCLED! SOFT-HEARTED!"
from The Fighting Seabees (1944)

06
"Do you know what they say about Laura Pember? They say she uses men like pep-up pills!"  from Stolen Hours which is also known as Summer Flight (1963)



05 "Love can make a killer out of a woman... and a fool out of any man!"
from I Thank a Fool (1962)

04 "She fell from fame to shame!" from I'll Cry Tomorrow (1955)

03
"The way SHE loved a Man could lead in only one direction - DOWN!"
from They Won't Believe Me (1947)

02 "A FAST BUCK... A FAST BRONC ... A FAST THRILL"
from The Lusty Men (1952)

01 "This story was filmed on location...  inside a woman's soul!"
also from I'll Cry Tomorrow (1955)
It's not just the greatest tagline from a Susan Hayward picture, it's the greatest movie tagline of the 20th century! And probably the 21st century too!! It deserves so many exclamation points !!!


At the annual convention of TLCOM (Tag Line Copywriters of America) their lifetime achievement prize is called "The Hayward".*

*I made that last part up but it should be the truth.

8 comments:

Hayden said...

INSIDE A WOMAN'S SOUL!

Walter L. Hollmann said...

OMG that last one literally made me LOL! Holy crap that is the greatest thing I've ever seen written on a poster! I want that on a t-shirt!

Glenn Dunks said...

As a lover of poster and particularly this brand of overly hysterical ones from this time period I love this piece. Hilarious and, yes, that is one helluva tagline!

Joe said...

Not only are the titles of the films, but the taglines!

You were definitely right with number one.

Peter Nellhaus said...

I'm getting biblical with Hayward myself. I've got David and Bathsheba on tap for my Henry King series.

Anonymous said...

ah, my best friend's wedding. they don t make em like they used to

Anonymous said...

The 01 tag is really great and the best of them, but it hasn't affected me much because when I read it I was still laughing out loud for tag 03...

NATHANIEL R said...

javi -- tags 3 through 1 are like the greatest things in life. I understand.