A History of... Gyllenhaal

It's Tuesday. Time for the first installment of a new series: "A HISTORY OF..."



1977 Lower-East Side hip marrieds Naomi Foner and Stephen Gyllenhaal welcome little Maggie Ruth into the world. Unbeknownst to the cutiepie infant, her parents are in the movie biz and she is destined for fame. Fortunately not in a Liza Minelli way.

1980 Naomi gives birth to gay icon Jacob Benjamin Gyllenhaal. Three-year-old Maggie has feelings about this. "People Magazine" resists the urge to declare him one of the sexiest men alive just yet; Too wrinkly. Too red. Squishy head.

1988 Naomi, despite having two young kids finds the time to write one of the greatest screenplays of the 80s, Running on Empty. She is deservedly Oscar-nominated for her super-mom accomplishment.

1991 Jake makes his first movie, City Slickers. The following spring co-star Jack Palance does push-ups at the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion.

1992 Daddy Stephen, an award-winning director, makes a movie called Waterland and Maggie follows Jake into professional actorhood. Stephen casts her in her next five films as well, proving that nepotism can sometimes reward us all. Meanwhile, in a fit of adolescent originality, Jake becomes obsessed with "Catcher in the Rye" (which Maggie gave him for Christmas). He can't put it down!

2000 Jake attends Columbia University where Maggie graduated the year before. Uma Thurman's daddy teaches him a thing or two. Jake drops out two years later.

2001 Jake & Maggie co-star in Donnie Darko. Curious moviegoers become Gyllenhaalics as the film achieves cult-hit status.

2002 Onscreen Jake suddenly carves out a fascinatingly specific niche: young brooding boytoy of older women in Lovely & Amazing, Moonlight Mile, and The Good Girl. Maggie also breaks out. She's so great in Secretary everyone forgets they're watching the 23rd James Spader as a perv performance. After thus winning critics hearts, Maggie also becomes a fashion forward icon for Young Hollywood.

Offscreen Maggie introduces Jake to Mary Jane Watson, Kirsten "Kiki" Dunst. A notoriously on-and-off-again Young Hollywood romance is born and its detritus continues to be chronicled in gossip blogs and tabloids four years later.

2003 Maggie hearts Peter (Sarsgaard).

2004 Due to Tobey Maguire's Seabiscuit-screwed back Jake almost gets his spidey-sense tingling with girlfriend Kirsten onscreen. But...it doesn't quite happen. At some point Jake suddenly starts looking like this. A whole new wave of Gyllenhaalics are born. This time they're gay.

2005 Maggie is brilliantly cynical in Don Roos Happy Endings and virtually no one notices but I --must be that special psychic connection we have; Sometimes I feel like I'm in love with Peter too! Jake is brilliantly optimistic in Brokeback Mountain and everyone notices...

2006 Oscar hoopla ensues. Jake becomes the second Gyllenhaal to be nominated for the big prize. Somewhere Kiki is seething with jealousy, probably wishing she hadn't known how to quit him. Jake moves on.

*

(more histories every Tuesday)

Presenting The Oscar Symposium

I try to come up with something new every year for Oscar. I've called in extra troops--asked some friends and strangers along for a discussion of all things AMPAS. The Symposium begins tomorrow morning. Let me know what you think as it rolls out for the next week. Without further ado... the introduction.

Multiplexes of Manhattan Missing Their Main Man

This morning I started feeling guilty about my annual break from the multiplex [which usually lasts from mid January to right about now when I start feeling, well, guilt. Raised in a religious home. I know from guilt, OK?] To reassure myself that it was indeed OK to deny those theater chairs my gorgeous ass I clicked over to box office mojo to see what America is watching.

The top dozen so far? 1 Underworld: Evolution 2 Big Momma's House 2 3 Hostel 4 Glory Road 5 Last Holiday 6 When a Stranger Calls 7 Nanny McPhee 8 The Pink Panther 9 Final Destination 3 10 Annapolis 11 Curious George 12 Tristan and Isolde. My feelings about this list. [thanks, fourfour]

A whole lotta gore, unneccessary sequelage, and double helpings o' James Franco. So, yeah. I'm OK right here in my swivel chair for another week. Though I'm sure that Julianne Moore will drag me out of the comforts of my apartment and back to the movie theater. She's the dangling carrot that the multiplex will resort to soon. Wish me luck @ Freedomland.

Two New Features

...coming tomorrow. I hope you enjoy. Always trying to kick it up a notch at the Film Experience. Do hope you appreciate the effort. And don't be shy about letting me know what works for you and what doesn't. Hump Day Hotties, Birthdays, Classic Movie of the Week, etc...

Hee!

When Publicity Stunts Go Wrong. You may have noticed a few new editions to the sidebar. This post is from the often laugh out loud funny Gilded Moose, which I recently added to your right (I hope you're discovering cool sites from the sidebars).

Love Stories

Since tomorrow is Valentine's Day [Have a Happy One!] let's get all sentimental with the movies.
Which screen love story makes you believe in love?
Which couple always strikes you as a perfect match?
Which tragic romance always gets you teary-eyed?
Which actor or actress do you think is regularly expert at convincing you they love each new co-star?
Discuss in the comments. If you're a heartless one, feel free to diss screen couples you hate.

Happy Birthday Rizzo

"There are worse things I could do, than go with a boy or two
Even though the neighborhood thinks I'm trashy and no good
I suppose it could be true. But there are worse things I could do
I could flirt with all the guys. Smile at them and bat my eyes
Press against them when we dance, make them think they stand a chance...
then refuse to see it through --That's a thing I'd never do.
I could stay home every night. Wait around for Mr. Right
Take cold showers everyday and throw my life away
On a dream that won't come true.
I could hurt someone like me, out of spite or jealousy
I don't steal, and I don't lie but I can feel, and I can cry
A fact I'll bet you never knew.
But to cry in front of you? That's the worse thing I could do"

No Sally Field Jokes, Please

Thanks to all of you who voted for me to become a member of the ModFab Six. Here they all are. The teary acceptance speeches begin w/ lil ol' me.

Let's Get Together, Yeah Yeah Yeah.

The Parent Trap was my favorite movie as a child. Hayley Mills was a perfect childhood idol. So this recut/subverted trailer for the 1961 family classic makes me laugh and completely horrifies me. It's so wrong. [src: pop on the rocks]

The Wind Beneath Their Co-Stars Wings

Five cheers for the female supporting players in this year's Oscar race. What a beauteous category, huh?


Rachel Weisz's fiery political activist has the lead for now but her character also has rough edges. Will Oscar go sweeter (Adams) or more Best Picturey (Williams) or will they feel like it's a "career honors" sorta year (Keener) ? Time will tell but for now enjoy the trivia, snub related whining, my successful campaign theories, and other useless info on the completed Supporting Actress page.

Yes, I do seem to be saving the Supporting Actor category for last. But every time I look at it I go all catatonic. The boredom sweeping over me, napping becoming the only option. I will eventually get there... Tomorrow the Supporting Actress Poll goes up on the main site and I am genuinely curious as to who is the readers choice for "SHOULD" win... The supporting categories being more divisive this year as to who AMPAS should be honoring.

Light (?) Reading

Julianne does a little sidestep [NY Mag]
The Business of Blasphemy [Rob Thurman]
Giles as Elton? Terrified but I'll watch the pilot [Whedon]
I am not alone re: feelings re: Santino, Nick & Nina [Johnny a Go Go]
Jack & Ennis's Grocery List [from "Elvira" by way of Lady Bunny though I first saw it anonymously on Oscarwatch than linked on ModFab. In other words, you've probably already seen it. But it's funny. So excuse my tardiness.]

Love to "The Boyfriend"

Longtime readers know "The Boyfriend" from his infrequent but oft-sarcastic blog comments (what is that about anyway?) but since today is our anniversary (8 Years. Holla!) I thought I should mention him...but in a movie related way since I think it rather icky when celebrities give too much detail about their personal romances. [Not that I'm a celebrity, but if you have to have a model for behavior, why not the gorgeous, rich, and fabulous?] Anyway, it always causes trouble when they go on and on about their romantic life so they are wise to keep their lips zipped. Brangelina...well done. The silence? Good.

The Boyfriend is a total and incurable Francophile when it comes to le cinema. His favorite movie this year --well, I knew it'd be French-language. It always is. I think it's his way of rubbing it in that he doesn't need the subtitles. If it's improbably not French like, say, 2001's Mulholland Dr...then it's still somehow connected to la France. Lynch's latest masterpiece was French financed. Canal + don'cha know?

So when I asked him what his favorite film of 2005 was recently he, hilariously true to form, says "Hmmmm. It's either Caché or Kings and Queen. Maybe Kings and Queen." Some of his other favorite cinematic things? Documentaries, Catherine Deneuve, Johnny Depp, Ingmar Bergman, Matthew Barney's Cremaster. I suspect part of his general movie-standoffishness is mere snobbery. He prefers art, Björk, and fashion. Example. He loves Brokeback Mountain --I know in my heart that he does--yet he refuses to fully admit to it because, you know, everyone else does. He doesn't care at all about "best ofs" or "awards" or "lists" of anything. How demented is that? But it's lovely that he is so patient with my full-time obsession.

xoxoxo

"and here ya are. and it's a beautiful day."

It's very Fargo today. Well, visually speaking it is. As far as I know there are no pregnant cops and dead bodies nearby. But it's a blanket of white. Last night I was sitting around with friends riffing on NY's panic about "THE DEADLY BLIZZARD!" while the snow fell and immediately evaporated on the pavement outside. Coming from Detroit I have to tell you that it is to laugh what people on the East Coast think of as a "blizzard." But, lo and behold, the snow actually did rally during the sleeping hours. And now Marge Gunderson would feel right at home or at least nearing the general vicinity. You betcha!

Unserved Demographic

I moved into my gorgeous apartment almost a year ago. I still get mail for the previous tenant. Some times strange things show up. Magazines aren't strange in and of themselves but they usually require subscriptions sooooo it doesn't make sense to get a magazine addressed to the previous tenant that you've never gotten before, 10 months after they've left.

The magazine that arrived today was the AARP Magazine. So either the previous tenant was getting up there in the years or the universe is trying to tell me that I'm no longer 20? [Hey, I knew that already. Go away.]

Movie culture is definitely not serving the senior demographic, obsessed as Hollywood is with video game adaptations and horror movies with tortured teens at the forefront, but this is a movie-focused issue I guess. Goldie Hawn is on the cover "Sexy, Sixty, and Speaking Out." And there's an article "5th Annual Best Movies For Grownups" So I figure since these few weeks are all about the countdown to Oscar, and most Academy members are in the AARP age range, let's hear what they have to say.

Their choices:
Best Movies for Grownups: Capote
Best Actor 50 and Over: Jeff Daniels, The Squid and the Whale
Best Actress 50 and Over: Joan Plowright, Mrs. Palfrey at the Claremont
Ooh, a hidden diss to Judi Dench? whaddya think?
Best Director 50 and Over: Steven Spielberg, Munich
Best Screenwriter 50 and Over: McMurtry & Ossana, Brokeback Mountain
Breakaway Accomplishment: David Strathairn, Good Night and Good Luck
I guess that's like "Breakthrough" but I'm always happy to see Strathairn recognized.
Best Documentary: Enron, the Smartest Guys in the Room
Best Intergenerational Movie: Dreamer: Inspired by a True Story
Best Comedy for Grownups: The Producers
Best Foreign Language Film: Ushpizin (Israel)
Best Grownup Love Story: The Family Stone (Craig T Nelson & Diane Keaton)
Best Movie Time Capsule: Cinderella Man
Best Movie For Grownups Who Refuse to Grow Up: King Kong
[complete article]

FB Awards Conclude

Try to remain calm ;) The FB Awards are now complete. This is always so hard to do. In my mind all the nominees are winners. Only this time of the year do I suddenly feel for the Academy members and the difficult choices they have to make. Perhaps there should only be nominees? All that remains to wrap up last year's movie madness is the Oscars themselves.

Friends of Dorothy. On Ice.

This post is dedicated to Joe Reid


The Olympics begin tonight. What better way to celebrate than by enjoying A Star is Born levels of showmanship and theatricality from one of the dominant figure skaters on the planet?! Your photo subject today is Olympic skater and gold medal hopeful Johnny Weir who, as Joe points out on his own blog, is a young RufusWainwright-like hoot. Oh sure you can drool over Jeremy Bloom with 90% of the population but you can bet his Abercrombie & Fitch ass he's never said anything as hilariously quippy as the bombs that Weir is willing to drop publicly. Skates are sharper than skis.

ModFab is also celebrating the Olympic inferno today. The actual festivities begin tonight with the Opening Ceremony.


Come taste the wine. Come hear the band.
Come blow a horn, start celebrating:
Right this way, your table's waiting...



Bring back the gold, Johnny. Bring it home!

You Knew This Was Coming

Listaholic here. Never planning to lay off the juice.
You remember the women? The men are coming...and they're doing it soon. Stay tuned.

Friday Cat Blogging: Screen Felines Guild

My cat Monty has not been doing anything worth writing about this week. Just moping about. I keep trying to tell him to 'do Monty Clift BEFORE Raintree County and all the tragedy. Try channeling the Clift of The Big Lift or Red River or something. Work with me, jeez!' But he's a cat you know. So he just trudges off to his trailer and refuses to listen. Always holding up production like some selfish diva. So if you need a cat fix this is a site for those beautiful citizens who love both cats and movies. Like myself.

Love the Ladies

I'm assuming you've voted on the new poll. But there's more Best Actress mania if you're interested: Lots of details now on the category page. Reese is the tiniest. She's the only one that sings in her movie this year but she's not the only one with talents perfectly suited to a movie musical. Two of our competitors share a birthday. The Americans are outnumbered. Only one of the ladies seems to have a nomination lined up for next year. Etcetera.

Oh, and for the bitter Joan Allen fans... I whine a lot about that, too. Surprise [/sarcasm] Read all about it.

Mia & Ziyi

Happy Birthday to Mia Farrow (of Woody Allen filmography fame) and Ziyi Zhang (of Memoirs of a Geisha infamy) who turn 61 and 27 respectively today.

Mia Farrow may have long since lost her marbles [not any one thing ~just a cumulative impression] but she is a talented actor who ought to get more respect. She doesn't even seem to be recognized as VERY famous anymore which she has been for decades. Mia is one of, I would say, the top ten of most famous and relatively admired actors who were never nominated for an Oscar. She first gained fame on the Peyton Place TV series, than shot to the celebrity stratosphere by way of becoming Frank Sinatra's third wife at age 21 (he was 51 at the time). She divorced him two years later, the year she also broke through cinematically as the star of Roman Polanski's sensational horror classic Rosemary's Baby. It was the film that brought along with it the first (of many) Oscar snubs. [If you haven't seen this film, do so instantly. Really great stuff.]

My three favorite Farrow performances give or take Rosemary's unfortunate pregnancy? Broadway Danny Rose (1984), Purple Rose of Cairo (1985), and Alice (1990). That's all Woody Allen but you'll truly marvel at her range within his very specific school of films if you watch all three.

Ziyi Zhang is more familiar to the world at large these days. Currently one could argue that she's the biggest non-English international film sensation. Maggie Cheung & Aishwarya Rai are beloved in specific pockets of moviefandom but don't seem to have fully caught on with the public at large. France, usually second only to Hollywood as an international movie-star factory, hasn't produced a major crossover sensation since Juliette Binoche in the 90s (though not for lack of trying: There are plenty of worthy candidates). I'm still hesistant to fully embrace Ziyi. I thought she was weak in Geisha and highly enjoyable but not necessarily great in her most acclaimed/noticed roles to date on these shores which are within Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon(2000) and The House of Flying Daggers(2004). But there's absolutely no competition when it comes to her best performance. Hands down that's her bewitching star turn in Wong Kar-Wai's gorgeous and haunting 2046 for which, in an ideal world, she would've received the awards attention that greeted her other far inferior 2005 performance.

If Hollywood were to make a biopic on Woody Allen or Mia Farrow right about now, you know they'd be all about snagging Ziyi to play Soon-Yi Previn.

Jumping the Shark While Wearing the Best Swimsuit You've Ever Seen

Though I normally type fast as Craig Schwartz files my motor skills are failing me today, steeped as I am in the deepest darkest pop-culture driven depression. I haven't felt this let-down by a loved on since Roseann won the lottery, since Kennedy and the Slayerettes suddenly over-populated my television, or since She semi-retired. The new cloud hanging over my head? The fear that Project Runway has jumped the shark in only its second (mostly brilliant) season.

Before you make the over-simplified claim that it is merely my love for a certain Nick (who got the boot last night) clouding my vision of a masterful entertainment, let me explain.

Though I often hate reality television, I have nothing against the genre. I think reality shows are, at their core, capable of brilliance (the same as any genre --it all depends on execution). I often enjoy them in their first season only to be entirely annoyed in the second because they always make the same mistakes as other reality shows; i.e. surprised by their initial success they desperately clamor to recreate the exact-formula which produced the sensation, and thereby rob the show of its organic magic by constantly trying to cast the first spell again.

This happened with the granddaddy of all reality shows: The Real World. The first season, an obvious experiment on the part of MTV, was absolutely intoxicating. Full of promise, impossible to see where it was going... unexpected friendships developed, super tense fights erupted sometimes blindsiding you. Etcetera. By the second season, the "performers" chosen were already too aware of what they were 'supposed to do' --get in fights, make outre decisions to gain camera time, etc... Now, many season later, the casting is always atrocious. They're always trying to fill "slots" -the party girl, the naive girl or boy, the jock, the gayboy, the drunk, etc... rather than coming up with a new group of people who will be interesting in and of themselves. Let the drama develop organically. It will. Drama always does if you've cast people with 'personality'

I could go on but I'll try and wrap up.

This same disease has infected Project Runway. How else to explain Santino's survival week after week after week (often he's in the bottom two) other than a "producers decision" because they feel he's their "Wendy Pepper" this year, the less attractive weirdly off-putting "villain" of the season. From the early episodes it was clear that he was the contestant they'd chosen to build the show's drama around through their editing choices. It's almost as if the producers don't realize that the fervent fanbase for this show finds ALL sorts of things interesting about the other characters and the contest itself. Look around the internet and find out. Santino is hardly the only calling card for the show's hit status. The reason why I absolutely know this to be true (the theorized producer interference I mean) is that the usually capable judges (on no other "contest" show are they as predictable in their adherence to judging based on merit as opposed to personality) are bending over backwards and changing the voting criteria every week to allow him to stay.

In an earlier challenge Emmett was booted opposite Santino because Santino was "ambitious" and was 'at least trying something innovative' -even though he had obviously designed the least practical most impossible to wear outfit. Emmett's outfit was ugly, simple, and unflattering. This week Nick is told that his "ambition did him in" in order for Santino to stay. Santino's garmet was ugly, simple, and unflattering. Last week Zulema is excised because her dress has ugly hems and "construction problems". This week Santino's outfit has a sleeve that FALLS OFF on the runway but he still gets to stay.

I am so angry this morning that such a reliably honest show (the ONE contest that's about talent) looks to be falling into the same pits and traps as countless other less interesting shows by making it about "drama" and "personality" instead of about the actual competition. If last night is any indication season 3 will just suck. Just spot the "villain" in the first two episodes and watch him/her make it to the final 3 to keep the 'drama' alive. As if drama can only be achieved with one type of storyline --the storyline from the first time you tried your experiment! For a show about innovation and artistic creation, they sure got all spread-sheet and factory like last night with their decision making.

Rock This Vote

Since there isn't enough on my plate [chortle] I've gone and volunteered my services as a potential member of the suddenly about-to-pop ModFab family. So, read those descriptions and vote for the six people you think are the best who are soon to make one of the best blogs going even better. I don't need to tell you how important it is to vote. Madonna, MTV, Ryan Seacrest, Howard Dean, Deee-Lite, and a host of others have already hammered that message in --so do it. The fate of the free world depends on your ability to pull levers.

Updates. Polls. Eastland Alums.

Lots of details up on the Best Director page. This HAS to be the first time two Facts of Life alums are ever vying for Hollywood's biggest prize. You know this is going in Eastland's brochure! (What would Jo and Blair ever make of this?)

In other site news, Ledger won the Best Actor poll in a landslide. (The poll with the most votes ever at the site -thanks for playing). Will any of the Best Actress candidates have as easy a ride in the new poll? You decide. And there's been very few contest entries received just yet, so get pitchin'. You could win.

Happy Birthday My Sisters!

Today, February 8th has always been a very special one for me. Both of my sisters were born on this day. One is my biological sister, the oldest child in the family (I am the baby) and my idol from the time I was in diapers until I was in 6th grade and she moved away [sob] to college. The other is my chosen sister, my best girlfriend of the past [ahem] 20+ years whom I immediately replaced my real sister with as my muse. Ha ha. Yeah. Christine and I go WAY back. We met in school and long before the driving-license days, I would walk her home after class let out and we would talk. talk. talk. talk. talk. talk. Two decades later we still have the ability to whip up a killer long-distance phone bill.

My sister is more of a reader than a moviegoer. Her taste in books also extends to movies: sci-fi and fantasy mainly. She's big on Star Wars and Lord of the Rings...that sort of thing. [If you've only been with this site and blog for a short time you can click here for an illustrated remembrance of my childhood at the movies that briefly stars my sis.] When we were kids she thought about becoming a costume designer (you know how I feel about that breed of people) and as adults, she did indeed follow her thread and needle muse. She's a successful designer of a work clothing company.

And my chosen sister Christine? Well the first movie I vividly remember us seeing together was Return of the Jedi (1983). We were both obsessed, very obsessed, with The Breakfast Club(1985) but the sympatico obsessions didn't last with all things celluloid. We don't always agree on movies. She prefers a happy ending. I like things a little dark. Another example of our divergence? Woody Allen doesn't agree with her and he's my favorite (for the most part), though we did see and enjoy Hannah and Her Sisters(1986) together. I can't do extremely violent films often but she doesn't respond well to them at.all. so I haven't suggested A History of Violence. She once nearly left permanent marks on my arm sitting beside me when we saw The Piano(1993), so upset was she at Holly Hunter's fate during one particularly ghastly moment involving an axe. This year she likes Crash and Walk the Line.

When it comes to TV shows, though, we're totally eye to eye soulmates again. We both enjoy love OK...we both worship anything by Joss Whedon starting with Buffy the Vampire Slayer. She also turned me on to Freaks and Geeks for which I am forever grateful. And I'm trying to get her to watch Battlestar Galactica as we speak, something I suspect she'll love.

So "Happy Birthday" to two of the greatest women on the planet! You don't know them but wish them well.

Hump Day Hotties: The Capote Boys

Tired of hearing Phillip Seymour Hoffman's name lauded, trumpeted, whispered in reverent awe? Yeah, me too. So under the heading of "spread the love around" celebrate with me the hotness of Dan (screenwriter), Bennett (director), and Clifton (co-star). All of them contributed a great deal to the success of Capote. Triple your pleasure.



Previous HDH still playing in theaters near you... Jonathan Rhys-Meyers (Match Point), Rachel McAdams(The Family Stone), & Daniel Craig(Munich)

Djay, Truman, Ennis, Edward, and Johnny

Just when you thought it was safe ~ another quiz. Which Best Actor are you? [and no I couldn't possibly do this for every category. I am not yet that far gone.]

Also you can check out the freshly updated, fully stocked Best Actor Commentary Page at the main site for more of my thoughts on how each man got nominated, who is going to win, etc... And of course there's the usual heap of useless trivia. Like this: All but one of them are dads. The one who is not is also the shortest and he speaks fluent Spanish. See? You SO needed to know that! You know you did.

Da-amn!

Too bad Vanity Fair ain't an EEO company when it comes to their annual Hollywood issue. You know they'd never ask the boys to do this. Just try and imagine this cover with ScarJo or Keira's contemporaries on it? Maybe the Brokeback boys. Imagine the uproar.

Of course they don't even make male movie stars this young. Scarlett is 21. Keira is 20. That'd be like who? Um... Ashton Holmes from A History of Violence with, let's see Jamie Bell? Imagine it. Or maybe you better not. It's a double standard right? Anyway. Scrap it. Can I just get a personal photoshoot with Tom Ford? No movie stars necessary. Or cameras for that matter. Just Tom and me, me and Tom... sigh

[See Just Jared for the full cover. Src: OscarWatch]

Ten Tuesday Treats

1. "Reese Witherspoon Will Cut You" -Joe Reid
Because Joe always makes me laugh. And because I share Joe's secret character-composite fears about Ms. Witherspoon.
2. "From Print to Screen" -Matt Savelloni
Because I violently disagree with his thoughts on Spielberg. Under the heading of dissenting voices --equal time and all that...
3. "The 2005 Nick's Flick Pick Honorees" -Nick Davis
Because he always expresses himself eloquently. And because, well, awards. duh.
4. "Jokeback Mountain" -Jeremy Barker
Because the parodies are pitching their tents faster than Ennis and Jack.
5. "Cronenberg is Coming to America" -Martha Fischer
Because it's the weirdest news I've read today.

6."Children of Men Preview" -CanMag
Because I've read the book and I still have no idea what to make of this movie. (Obviously not a super-faithful transition) And I wonder if Julianne will ever take a role that does not involve pregnancy and/or mysteriously absent children again?
7. "Sweet Corruption"-The Malcontent
Because John Waters? We need more of him. If not his movies at least his amused irreverent spirit. [src]
8. "Ex-Gays Say Brokeback Too Tempting"-Blue Exile
Because we knew this would be coming. They call themselves ex-gays but to me they're just plain old drama queens. Come out and you might find that your "unfathomable pain" is a symptom of how shitty you've been treating yourself as a human being and not of your desire to have a three-way with Heath and Jake. [I mean who wouldn't? Seriously. Don't beat yourself up about it.]
9. Didja Read? The Fountain -Capt. Handsome
Because I really have to start paying more attention. I wasn't aware Aronofsky had gone the graphic novel route. Anyone read that?

AND...
10. "Pitch a Sequel" -T.F.E.
Because you like the contests. If you're feeling creative, enter this one!

Someone I Miss

Not Switzerland

A curious thing occurs each year about this time (post-nominations / pre-Oscars). I begin to get various e-mails, messages questioning my biases and such in my film coverage. The core of these messages always seems to be: You should be neutral.

Newsflash! I am not, have never been, and never wish/plan/could be neutral. I am not a reporter. You're reading opinion pieces. Without editorialization and point of view there is no Film Experience. There is no blog. There is nothing for me to say that you can't read somewhere else. I'm assuming most of you reading understand and embrace this. But for those who don't... I am not Mary Hart reporting on everything from someone's payroll with a non-judgmental smile. I am just a passionate devourer of film, theater, tv, etc... who likes to write about the things that amuse, annoy, and perplex me as well as the things that are so great that they demand my complete subservience and obsession [this past few months that'd be A History of Violence, Brokeback Mountain, and Project Runway for those not paying attention.]

So, no, the Oscar coverage is neither fair nor balanced. I'm rooting for Brokeback, Ang Lee, Heath Ledger and Reese Witherspoon. It's out in the open! ...not like it wasn't already painfully obvious.

Multiple Viewings Part 2

When I see a film more than once it falls into one of these four categories. We've already discussed the first two. So what of...
3) Those whose weaknesses become overpowering.
4) Oops, my bad. This film is great.

The fourth category --"oops my bad!"-- is rare. It sometimes involves masterpieces in disguise like, say, Showgirls which I originally thought of as unintentionally funny/bad and which I now accept fully as intentionally satiric and deliriously purposefully awful. But most films in this category are things I saw when I was not old enough to fully "get" them --films like Vertigo, Breaking the Waves,Blue Velvet. You have to be ready.

The third category, nosediving affection, is as common as the second (unfortunately). Crash and King Kong = Yep. third category. I liked but didn't come close to loving the former on first viewing. I loved the latter but had issues with the length and some setpieces. On second viewings of both I just wanted to throw things at the screen. Hurt them. Watching them again I was channelling Sandra Bullock (sorta) in the former "I'm angry all the time and I don't do know why!"

Crash is, as I always knew, just too 'surface'. It's so facile that it's easy to understand the contempt some feel for it. I still feel like it works as a whole in spite of itself. But here's the thing: Films about the evils of prejudice that play into the audience prejudices in a big way are off-putting. Philadelphia(1993) with its intense focus/audience surrogate use of Denzel Washington's homophobia was the same way. Blech! Plus Crash simply borrows too much from other films, like the far superior Magnolia, from which it doesn't borrow so much as outright rob. Replace "Wise Up" with "In the Deep" and frogs with snow and you'll see why.

King Kong is an even sadder example. I want to love this picture. I have been a fan of Peter Jackson for 11 years. I think Heavenly Creatures is one of the five best films of the 1990s. I think The Lord of the Rings will live on forever like, say, The Wizard of Oz. But I think Kong is a mess. I hate feeling this but I do. I just don't care when I'm watching it about anything other than Kong and Ann Darrow. Which would be fine if the film didn't stir so many other ingredients into its pot. Jackson feels the need to pad everything. It's almost as if the narrative needs and success of adapting Tolkien's multi-volume fantasy epic have robbed Jackson and team of the ability to discern and prune. Kong isn't large enough to support such grandiosity. Tolkien's epic outright required it to function.

King Kong is an adventure tale and in its current incarnation its so bloated that it just won't rampage like it should. There are breathtaking moments and there is magical chemistry in the Kong/Darrow relationship. But there is SO much else clogging the viewing experience. I want to run at the movie with scissors --removing entire sequences, pruning all action sequences by 1/2, combining characters, etc... until it's as scary/wondrous as I know it should be. I see the greatness in it but I have to squint and constantly shove obstructions from my view in order to do so. As a movie it's like that novel in Wonder Boys, 1000s of pages long because the author just couldn't stop writing and lost his ability to edit. I fear for what this means for Peter Jackson's next movies...

Multiple Viewings Part 1

Last night I rewatched Happy Endings. I am not big on multiple viewings, principally because there's always older films I need to catch up with and new movies coming out (well, right now not so much but you get my point). But when I do see a film twice or thrice it ends up falling into one of these four categories:

1) Those which confirm what I originally thought.
2) Those which grow more loveable, warts and all.
3) Those whose weaknesses become overpowering.
4) Oops, my bad. This film is great.

The majority of films -probably as much as 80-85% fall into the first category. The reaction might be tweaked or tilt slightly more positive or negative but it's the same reaction. In the smiling second category you'll find films like Happy Ending. I liked the film the first time. The second time, I noticed all the same things I wished were different --some shots need to be held longer, the experimental comic bits (text on screen) are hit and miss, one performance still bothers me . And like most multiple narratives, some storylines hold more interest than others (always a danger for anyone playing the Altman game). But this time I just didn't care.

Roos really loves all of the characters. The humanism of the film, the lack of judgment, the complex tones ["it's a comedy. Sort of."]. If you've never seen it it's worth a rental. And if you liked it but couldn't decide how much, try it again. One thing I loved so much more the second time? The film's ending. I am crazy about Maggie Gyllenhaal's singing voice. The song is "I Love You Just The Way You Are" and the film seals the deal visually with a great long held closeup of Lisa Kudrow. If you haven't seen the film try to picture her character, a mix of Phoebe Buffet's late Friends bitchy wisecracks, mixed with Sarah Jessica Parker's audience distancing behavior in The Family Stone and Grace Adler's neurosis and self-absorption from "Will & Grace" without the punchlines/laughtrack and you have something approximating the prickly and unhappy "Mamey" from Happy Endings. In the last shot of this uptight woman smiling I felt as if writer/director Don Roos was actually transferring his intense affection for her over onto the audience, me. It was a great feeling. Sentiment earned.

Later today we'll visit films falling into the third & fourth categories... But how about you? Which film asked you to love it more on a second viewing?

Laura, Lizzie, June, Bree, or Josey?

(Under the umbrella of you're bored on a Sunday evening. Why not kill even more time at your computer doing useless things? ) So...Laura, Lizzie, June, Bree, or Josey -- which one are you?

Complex Math. Hollywood Myth.

Joe Reid is back! His new column does some complex mathematical "value" equations and dishes on Oscar's fabulous party...

"This Oscar season --with its Brokebacks and its Capotes and its Murrows -- offers a perfect opportunity for conservos to re-ignite the culture wars. Only, this time I don't think it's working too well. Brokeback Mountain is a legitimate hit, at $55 million and climbing, and has been largely resistant to the hatchet jobs we all figured were coming. Still, the hatchet jobs continue, as do the constant stream of lecturing pundits who desperately want us to believe that Hollywood hates America. Which is a myth, and I will tell you why..."
Read the rest...

Quote of the Day

Walter Murch, editor, on the ambiguities of great films.

"...it's a wonderful dilemma: you have to acknowledge that there must be unsolved problems at each stage. As hard as you work, you must have this secret, unspoken hope that one very significant problem will remain unsolved. But you never know what that is until the film is done. You can almost define a film by the problem it poses, that it can't answer itself, that it then asks the audience to solve."

From the book The Conversations: Walter Murch and the Art of Editing Film

Top of the Mountain

It's finally official Brokeback Mountain is the year's top grossing Best Picture nominee. Woo-hoo. [previous post on this subject]

December Falling

You know how I love to harp on Hollywood's annoying release patterns when it comes to serious adult / prestige fare? Well... last night I read an annoying article on Oscarwatch that trots out the whole tired "Only December works!" argument that I hate with a passion. I keep trying to convince the studios and the public that it just ain't true and they keep on drinking their Kool-Aid that every year is 1988 or 2002 (the only only-Christmas-will-do crazy years in a long time). This year, like most every annum, shows that other months are valid. May, September, and October all have representing films. Glenn has a fine post detailing how pre-December heavy this year really is.

To be fair there are disadvantages to releasing early. Certainly the first quarter is big trouble. You have to be either a huge sticky hit (Silence of the Lambs) or a critically hosanna'd player (preferrably in a big hit) to survive (see Julia Roberts in Erin Brockovich versus Joan Allen in The Upside of Anger [sigh]). But May onward? That's regular game for Oscar competition. There are all sorts of ways to strategize with Oscar campaigns. December doesn't work for every film and often it leads to careless release patterning that kills worthy films (See: The New World & Match Point).

Crash would not have been nominated if released in December. Some films have to work with momentum and fanbase fervor rather than pedigree and "bait". If you aren't a pre-ordained frontrunner and you open in platform in late December there's no time for Oprah to go bonkers, for op-ed pieces to be written etc.. There are examples like Crash in most years. Films that need time. I could talk about this all day. So I'll shut up now. Long story short: I hate the lazy thinking that makes December a madhouse at the theater and makes the rest of the year relatively dry for films with actual substance. Any month can work for the right film and the right campaign. I hope the studios realize this in time in this new year so that 2006 gives us cinematic pleasure in each quarter.

FB Awards Wrap-Up

Thank you for your patience. The FB Award Nominations are now complete.
Categories just added
Best Kiss -John & June, pimps and they hos, ranchhands, and more...
Best Sex Scene -Hong Kong playboys, randy spouses, and gay cowboys.
Best Character Intro -big apes, swedish actresses, country superstars, and more...
Best Opening -murder and mayhem, escapes from mysterious forces, and more...
Best Ending hippie-freak afterglow, self-imposed misery, 1977 revisited, and more...
Scenes of the Year The dozen (or so) moments that rocked this filmgoer the most last year.

Medalists will be announced a week from today on Friday February 10th 2006 concluding the 6th annual edition of the FiLM BiTCH AWARDS. (whew)

Friday Cat Blogging: Hey That's My Cat's Name!

A few years ago I started noticing that my name "Nathaniel" is not that uncommon anymore. Lots of kids are named that now. When I was a wee one I was the only Nathaniel amongst a sea of Davids, Johns, Seans, Toms, etc... But names come and go in popularity. So, today and because my familiar is never far away (in fact, he's sitting in a chair right next to me. He must like the sound of the keyboard). I wondered if other people name their cats Monty. It turns out they do! How rude.

Ah well, at least most of those cute & fuzzy felines aren't named after Montgomery Clift. So my kitten is still the most cinematically connected. And appropriately ill-tempered. Hey, he's just channeling a troubled soul. He's a method cat.

I Hope You're All Reading...

Dan Renzi's Project Runway recaps. I liked him well enough in his season of Real World. But after the first season I was never a regular viewer so I had no idea how f-u-n-n-y he is. Well done. If you're at all into Project Runway it's a must read. If you aren't into Runway, the best show on television, [i repeat myself indignantly when it comes to this show so say it with me now...] "what's wrong with you?!"

Fantastical

You know how they say it takes a few years for major movie sensations to influence what you see at the multiplex? We got the first big taste of Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings's combined shockwaves two christmases in a row with the debut of the Lemony Snicket and Narnia franchises. Underwhelming and still cash cows. Turns out Potter made everyone a fantasy book fan and Peter Jackson made it safe for fantasy to be trusted as both a highly lucrative investment and a bid for critical prestige and Oscar glory. In other words we're a long way from the 80s when Legend was for D&D brats only. Sword and sorcery was almost exclusively straight-to-video fare. Some upcoming films with fantasy elements to be hesitantly excited about.

A Sequel to The Dark Crystal, 1982's puppet fantasy spectacular. I was hella wild about that as a kid. Crossing my fingers.
Miss Potter. The unthinkable has happened. I'm excited about a movie to star La Zellweger. This isn't "fantasy" per se but it'll have a mix of real and imagined courtesy of Babe director, Chris Noonan.
Pan's Labyrinth -- Crazy Mexican and fanboy favorite Guillermo del Toro is making another scary/bizarre horror fantasy thing.
Another multi-film fantasy franchise for New Line They hope to capture lightning in a bottle a second time. Anand Tucker will helm His Dark Materials

But the usual fate of films in general, particularly expensive genre ones? That's "Development Hell".
Elric of Melnibone who is one of hard fantasy's most famous protagonists, was supposed to be on his way to the movies as early as 2003. Still no movement of any significance.

Best Picture. The Tiny Details

Know the details. In the end Munich, Steven Spielberg's tense exploration of the Munich Olympic massacre aftermath, pulled out of its PR tailspin to win the coveted nomination from Walk the Line. Still, the Oscars are to-be-owned by the great Ang Lee gay tragic romance Brokeback Mountainwhich --catch this neat trick for a gay romance-- within 24 hours it will be the highest grossing Best Picture nominee.



Read the rest for lots and lots of tiny details that Oscar obsessives love. Find out...
1. How these films got nominated.
2. Which Oscar trends they are connected to.
3. What all-time record Spielberg is gunning for.
4. Which two categories are most dangerous to miss in the nominations if you want to win Best Picture.
And more... As always, feel free to share if you know of more interesting trivia... Each of the top six categories will get this exhaustive treatment over the next two weeks, so keep reading.

America's Best Pictures

There's probably going to be a lot of editorials coming on the low grosses of this year's Best Picture slate and how the Academy just thumbs their noses at the public -blah blah blah [since when should awards be based on box office? --the money is the reward there. And the People's Choice more than covers our needs for awards for mainstream hits] so let's look quickly at the top 5 films of the year according to your ticket buying dollars. Is it true that Oscar ignores them? Or is that mere myth-making on the part of the press and whiny factions of the public?


Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith Gross: $380,270,577
George Lucas's 28 year-long space opera concluded with what some people considered a bang. But to the eyes of Oscar voters? More like a whimper. The Star Wars films have amassed an impressive total of 10 Oscars and about two dozen other nominations. The Academy reaction to this last installment detailing the birth of Darth Vader can only be read as atypical; This is the very first SW "episode" to be shunned in the visual effects category and only the second to be ignored in the sound categories, presumably to favor Memoirs of a Geisha(?!) It gets weirder. This is the first Star Wars film to ever be recognized by the Academy's makeup branch. That's quite an honor when you stop to consider that the branch is known for rejecting makeup work if they feel a computer has touched it too much (Nicole Kidman's proboscis in The Hours was so disqualified). Is there anything in this universe that hasn't been touched to the point of molestation by computers? A very odd nomination.

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire Gross: $286,335,255
Another strange honor? That would be the Art Direction nod for the fourth (!) installment of this boy wizard series. This is production designer Stuart Craig's second nomination for this series. He's been with it the whole time but it was 2004's Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban that shook up the "look" of the series. So why a second nod now? On the fourth film?

The Chronicles of Narnia Gross: $278,133,732
Let's say you have sometimes shaky rubbery and excessive CG in your movie that pales in comparison to something else that's going for the same effect and gunning for the win (that'd be King Kong) . Let's say you have that and still want an Oscar nod? The solution: Be a big hit. The Oscar nomination will still come. Two other nods: makeup and sound.

War of the Worlds Gross: $234,280,354
It's Spielberg so the Academy pays attention. The summer spectacle was honored in Visual Effects, Sound, and Sound Editing. Deserving nods all despite my reservations about the film entire.

King Kong Gross: $213,298,980
Same nods as War plus Art Direction. Aside from the tech snubs of Sith this giant ape is the only member of the public's favored quintet that could have reasonably been expected to make a better showing. But a word to the wise in terms of Oscar predictions: Whenever a filmmaker sweeps the awards as Jackson did just two years back, his next offering or two will be largely ignored by the Oscars no matter how "baity" it looks on paper or even onscreen (Just ask Attenborough, Eastwood, Demme, Howard, Jackson, Allen, etc...) . Unlike the Emmy Awards, Oscar loves fresh meat. If you're thanking your agent on stage at the Kodak, you're going to have to wait at least 4 or 5 years before you get a chance to do so again. That seems to be the window wherein they're excited to vote for you again.

So draw your own conclusions. But here's mine: I believe that the madlove of ticket buyers helps rather than hurts ones chances of having "Oscar Nominee" plastered on your video box when it comes time to hit the living rooms of the nation. And I also believe that, Capote aside, the grosses of this year's actual Best Picture nominees are more than worthy/respectable. Munich looks like a flop when you consider Spielberg's averages. When you add in the subject matter and downer ending (so uncharacteristic for the world fav moviemaker) that $40 million in the first month doesn't look that bad. Brokeback Mountain is just getting started with its expansion and already near Crash's word-of-mouth hit gross in the $50s. It will end its run as the top grossing of the Best Picture nominees by a good margin and will certainly finish in the "Box Office Top 40" of all movies released in 2005. And Good Night and Good Luck? For what some would call a hermetic history lesson in black & white with only one box office draw in a small role? $25 million outside of awards season is a fine accomplishment.