Friday, May 16, 2008

Why Modern Technology and the Internets Can Be Bad For Your Sanity

Any teenagers or early 20somethings reading will be alarmed but there was a time before all life was lived through technological gadgets: a time before camera phones, instant messaging, ipods and crackberries. Most of the time I love modern technology and the web but sometimes I think I'd be better off back in the 80s where my correspondence was over the telephone. I would sometimes have to wait hours for my parents, brothers and sister to get off the phone. In desperation I might jump on my bicycle (being careful to avoid rampaging dinosaurs or swooping pterodactyl on the road) and pedal on over to a friend's house with some excitement or another I needed to share. Bad news travelled slowly and good news too ...which is okay, more time to enjoy. Sometimes ignorance is bliss.

True story. Yesterday I am perusing my favorite blogs as I am prone to do and I read this little missive on the always enjoyable My New Plaid Pants about the Final Destination franchise. I have never seen one of those movies because even thinking about horror films gives me nightmares. And as I was giggling about JA's obsession and quivering a little at the hooky concept (with which I was familiar, it being "sticky") about cheating death and the loopy ways with which it will find you anyway, my gmail beeps at me and this very image pops up.


Yes, that is exactly what it looks like.

A piece of lumber has sailed through the passenger window of a car. (I'm certain I've seen people impaled this way in movies. Was it The Descent or maybe the famous Dutch film The 4th Man?) This image arrives in my mailbox from The Boyfriend's iPhone sent from inside. this. car. Yes, while he is still shaking from his life flashing before his eyes (thankfully when one takes a cab one sits in the back seat), I am able to share in his near-death terror almost instantaneously. In the 80s I wouldn't have heard about this (let alone seen it) until hours later had it happened to a loved one. BUT since I am reading about Final Destination in 3-D mere moments before seeing this projectile photo, I spend the rest of the day, and perhaps this whole business trip of his, worried that The Grim Reaper is angry that The Boyfriend escaped its bony-hand clutches.

JA owes me! I hate iPhones, the internets and instant access to everything today. If you need me I will be available only by snail mail or by rotary phone ... just try to find one.
*

12 comments:

Jason Adams said...

DUDE! In Final Destination 2, a piece of lumber (actually, an entire log) flies through a police officer's window and rips his head off, ya know. No, of course you don't know that, but it does. OH MY GOD. I take it everyone was okay, though. Obviously, or this wouldn't have been a light-hearted post. But still! I love my cinematic violence, but I'd be laid up in the emntal hospital if that'd happened to me or to my boyfriend, so I get your jitters. TERRIFYING. Jesus.

Jason Adams said...

Also, yes that happens in The Descent. It's been awhile since I've seen 4th man so I don't remember if it happened there or not.

Seriously. Damn. Scary.

Joe Reid said...

Oh my God. OH MY GOD. How totally scary!

(And yes, it was The Descent.)

Anonymous said...

It happens with a surfboard in one of the Lethal Weapon movies. Good thing there's no surfing in NYC. I'm glad the boyfriend is ok.

NicksFlickPicks said...

Frak! I know you won't even see this, so I will send you a courier message later, but this is truly, genuinely scary. Similar to how Alan J. Pakula died on the L.I.E. a few years ago, too. Totally horrifying. I'm SO glad He Who Shall Not Be Named (But For Better Reasons Than She) is okay!

Anonymous said...

I'm glad nothing happened ;)

I share your opinions about technology and all those gagdets, my mobile phone can't take photos, has no fancy ringtones, etc and its greateat feature is a colour screen, lol.

By the way, I do have a rotary phone at home. And it works! It makes an unbearable awful noise when you're talking, but still...

Iggy

Anonymous said...

I haven't seen The Descent, but I did see The 4th Man and it's a long metal pylon that falls off a truck, goes through Jeroen Krabbe's windshield and impales him through the eye. Yep, that one scared me.

And driving on the highway after seeing one of the Final Destinations was pretty unnerving, too. Images popping up in one's mind...

RC said...

yikes! i admit, saw Final Destination 1 in the movie theater and that was it.

the attempt to kill people in creative ways is simply disturbing...

...there's one scene that i will never forget from the first film...ugh!

Glenn Dunks said...

Aah, that's terrifying, Nat! Glad the boyfriend is okay.

RC, was it the bus scene? I bet it was the bus scene. Cause, seriously, that scene is the greatest "walking out into the road and getting hit by an oncoming vehicle" scene ever. I admit to having a partiality to the Final Destination movies. There's a sense of silliness and absurdity that is missing from similarly themed "let's kill people in strange ways" like Saw. I mean, in the third one a man's head gets crushed by freakin' gym equiptment!

But, actually, the thing that I thought of immediately upon seeing the image you posted was Scream 2. There's a scene when the killer is driving the cop car with Neve Campbell and Anonymous Black Chick #203b in the back seat and the policeman is hanging onto the bonnet. The car crashes into a stack of metal poles and one goes straight through the back of the cops' head and out his eyeball then through the windshield.

Of course you probably don't wanna hear about that, do you?

Catherine said...

I read this before I went to sleep last night, and I dreamt your bf had posted a picture of himself and he was Mexican. I thought "Oh, cool, maybe he can teach me Spanish" and then I woke up. Glad he's okay, (Mexican or not).

George said...

Hi guys, I have a blog about technology too, but its coming from a different perspective. You should check it out, you might see modern technology in a different light from now on:

http://www.geopelham.blogspot.com/

George said...

It is done. Would you mind doing the same?