Thursday, July 17, 2008

My Mama Mia Conundrum

Rob here from The Country Fair and the Circus. I know I promised Nathaniel that I wouldn't use the guest-blogging as my own personal therapist's couch but I need to come to terms with something that's been bugging me lately.


Stellan... we need to talk.

I'm not sure why you decided to take a part in the Mama Mia movie. Perhaps you just wanted to change it up and do something silly. Perhaps you were tired of still being a "that guy" even after your stint in the Pirates movies. Truth is, I don't know... so I don't judge.

You had to know that Pierce and Colin would be getting billed above you, but I'm sure it still stung when some trailers and commercials ignored you entirely. It's as if they were saying, "who is Amanda Seyfried's dad? hunky Pierce? dreamy Colin? Or... oh man, hope it's not "that guy."

So I can only assume you were trying to make yourself stand out a bit when you decided to do this:


Now maybe it was the photographer's idea, I understand. But you could have said "no." I mean, you're a respectable actor. You've been in Lars von Trier movies.

Which brings me to my next point. No one who's been in three or more Lars von Trier movies should ever be allowed to do this:


How am I supposed to watch Dogville now? I mean it's a harmless, kitchy film on it's own, but now every time I see you perpetrating unspeakable acts upon Nicole Kidman I'm going to think of this:


Truth is, I've been having trouble not thinking of it, say... every time I close my eyes. Seriously Stellan, give me a call. I think we need to talk through this.

7 comments:

Derek said...

http://img235.imageshack.us/img235/264/0000bailandotq2.jpg

elgringo said...

I guess that remembering him first from The Glass House softened the blow.

Still, that's pretty rough.

Scott
he-shot-cyrus.blogspot.com

mikadzuki said...

Hahaha, exactly my thoughts!

But actually, that whole poster kind of creeps me out. I first saw it when I opened a YouTube clip to listen to the movie's rendition of "Money, Money, Money" and it suddenly struck me that the characters on the poster appeared to be dancing along to the song in the most annoying way possible. Stellan doing a rhythmic, leglifting march dance. Brosnan in a sort of sliding, disco dance. Argh!

J.J. said...

Ha!

(Skarsgard was probably a bone thrown to Sweden. A movie soundtracked by ABBA has to have at least one onscreen Swedish rep.)

Anonymous said...

Stellan was case in a hurry after Billy Nighy dropped out due to conflict with another movie he was in.

Glenn said...

He's actually the best of the blokes, even though he barely gets to sing at all (he does a duet at the end but it's all a bit rushed). Still, I'd rather a thousand weird European actors over Pierce Brosnan who is purely dreadful in the movie.

Walter L. Hollmann said...

oh man, Stellan's pose alone convinced my friends to see the movie. can't wait to see it tomorrow!