June Weddings

Excerpt from the June 12th, 2004 edition of New York City tabloid, The Daily Globe...

...their engagement had been announced at the Science Library of New York's annual benefit gala where Captain John Jameson was the guest of honor. But it all ended shockingly as the bridegroom was left standing at the altar, dumbfounded. He held a literal "Dear John" note in his hand. Father of the bridegroom J. Jonah Jameson, publisher of the The Daily Bugle and notorious tightwad, immediately cancelled the catered reception noting the high cost of caviar.

Runaway Bride
Mary Jane Watson, 20 of Forest Hills, was last scene running from the church past the public fountain. She still wore her full wedding ensemble, a white bridal gown with long trail and white diamond drop earrings. The runaway bride still carried her full bouquet of white flowers. Eye-witnesses claim to have seen a huge smile on her face.

Psychiatric experts warn that though last minute wedding jitters are far more common in movies, such erratic behavior in life is usually indicative of mood disorders. Former high school classmates say that Ms. Watson, a popular student and would be actress, had been known to suffer periodic bouts of moony depression and had recently grown estranged from friends. Millionaire Harry Osborne, a frequent companion, was notably not present for the intended nuptials.

"She always had that sleepy far away look in her eyes. Like she wasn't even there," said former boyfriend Flash Thompson, prompting yet more speculation about the bride's psychological well-being...

previous weddings: Tony & Maria and Mr and Mrs Incredible