Thursday, January 04, 2007

Movie Mash-Up: Miranda's New Assistant

Each January I like to let you all into my movie addled brain where all the movies run together. Characters from one film are free to converse or [insert verb of choice here] with characters from another all year long. Plotlines expand to include unlikely swerves into new genres and movie mash-ups are born.

So here's a new poll The Devil Wears Prada... Again.

The pitch: Miranda (Meryl Streep) has lost her assistant Andrea (Anne Hathaway) and is none too pleased. The search is on for a new assistant to use and abuse. Which movie character would you most like to see get this job?

Take the poll and have fun with the scenarios in the comments. You know you want to play along.


par3182 said...


Anonymous said...

Ugly Betty.

Anonymous said...

This pole is just fantastic! Very creative and interesting!

goatdog said...

I'd like to see the screaming matches between Miranda and Mark Wahlberg's Dignam from The Departed. Does the sequel have to be rated PG-13?

Michael Parsons said...

I can see this as a sapphic bondage comedy.
Miranda hires Lee Holloway (Maggie Gyllenhall from Secretary). Not only does Lee rise to the occasion, but she loves the torment her new boss subjects her too. Miranda, after another failed marriage, loves the power her new relationship brings and tries to see how far Lee will go. Emily (Emily Blunt) is furious and decides to fight fire with fire and tries to out kink Lee. Confusion, hilarity and S&M injuries ensue.

Anonymous said...

Michael - That was hilarious. The funniest thing I've read all day.

Anonymous said...

Miranda's New Assistant
(from Jonathan Lewis, film critic for Gay Chicago Magazine, member of C.F.C.A.)

Andy Sachs (Anne Hathaway) leaves Miranda's employ to become a journalist. Without her as a buffer, first assistant Emily (Emily Blunt) is desperate to find a replacement. Recently unemployed due to the end of his sequels, Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) is available immediately. Emily hopes that Jack's loosey goosey demeanor will drive Miranda insane, which would be fair revenge for years of mistreatment by the boss-from-hell. Emily's plan backfires when Jack charms his way into Miranda's bed, melting her frigid careerist exterior. Miranda suddenly begins sporting loose, flowing garments and decides that next fashion season will be all about Pirate Chic. Miranda is once again at the top of her profession; Jack has secured a permanent supply of rum, and Emily goes bonkers requiring institutionalization. Meanwhile, somewhere in the Third World, Andy is interviewing low-paid textile workers making straw hats.