Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Recycled Experience: Pink Ladies

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix will now be spinning in homes across the world thanks to the DVD release, so I thought it was time to revisit Imelda Staunton's memorable villainess "Dolores Umbridge", who stands zero chance at an Oscar nomination though people will remember the performance 20 years from now when they've forgotten the actual nominees.

Here we go (originally published in the summer):


It's easy to get Dolores Umbridge (Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix) and Elle Woods (Legally Blonde) confused, swathed as they are in more shades of pink than you previously knew existed. But don't be fooled! They are not, in point of fact, identical. They only share a tendency to project good cheer and a love of pink bordering on the pathological.

"I love what you've done with the place Dorrie, but maybe we could cheer up the rest of Hogwarts, too!"

The similarities end there.
That cheerful demeanor? To Elle it comes naturally...it's truly shiny optimism. To Dolores, it's a put on... a mask for her fearful nature.
Elle never goes anywhere without Bruiser, her chihuahua, who is lovingly accessorized. Dolores keeps her kittens locked up tight, they're mere accessories.
Dolores is all about rote memorization. This professor values theory over creativity in practice. Elle objects!
Elle attempts to befriend her enemies. Dolores aims to punish hers.

Dolores is not impressed with Elle's cheerful tour of Harvard. Have these students no discipline?


Elle Woods has managed to bring a lot of fuddy duddy people around to her way of thinking but she's met a stubborn match in Dolores Umbridge. Despite Elle's best efforts, there remains only one thing that Dolores wants to "bend & snap": the spirit of her student body.

Yes, they're twins on the surface only. Aside from their signature color they share but one thing: a stubborn and absolute certainty that "Think Pink" from Funny Face is the greatest musical number of all time

Think pink! think pink! when you shop for summer clothes.
Think pink! think pink! if you want that quel-que chose.
Red is dead, blue is through,
Green's obscene, brown's taboo.
And there is not the slightest excuse for plum or puce
or chartreuse.
Think pink! forget that Dior says black and rust.
Think pink! who cares if the new look has no bust.
Now, I wouldn't presume to tell a woman
what a woman oughtta think,
But tell her if she's gotta think: think pink!


*

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey Nathaniel!
I agree that Dolores will be remembered in 20 years...

It doesn´t have anything in common with the topic of the post but maybe you´re interested in knowing that Pedro Almodovar has talked today about his new movie. It will have Penelope in the main role again and it´ll be called "The broken hugs". The story will be taking place in the 90´s, and it is a film noir around the world of cinema.

More (spanish) info: http://www.elpais.com/articulo/cultura/nueva/pelicula/Almodovar/llamara/i/abrazos/rotos/i/elpepucul/20071211elpepucul_3/Tes

Great site!

Anonymous said...

Staunton was amazing in this film... as was Rickman, Oldman, Thompson and Bonham Carter. All the series needs is McKellan and Mirren and they have the entire British academy covered.