Monday, May 18, 2009

Ron Howard Cracked

Cracked takes on the oeuvre of Ron Howard with a flow chart (first half below).


I love that "still a true story?" gets looped until the answer is no. Hee. See the complete chart and article. It's funny stuff.

I'm perplexed that millions of people thought Angels & Demons might be worth seeing. I distinctly remember that people -- and quite a lot of them at that -- thought that The DaVinci Code* was, to put it nicely, "not good". Why is it that huge hordes of people can often be lured into sequels to movies they didn't love with much greater ease than they can be lured into acclaimed movies that they might actually love with a passion should they ever give them a chance? See also: The Blockbuster Loop.

*Full confession: I never saw the movie as I remain agnostic on Tom Hanks after all these years and am unfond of Howard's "serious" movies. But I did try to watch it at home a year ago, only to be completely horrified at how unwatchable it was. As in: much worse than I had originally suspected it to be. I think I lasted 30 minutes.

22 comments:

Andrew K. said...

Thank god there is one sane person not duped by this Davinci Code/Angels and Demons crap. I totally feel you about not being fond of the 'serious' Tom Hanks. In fact I am a bit blah about him on the whole. If only he had stuck to lite stuff like Splash. Within his range, I think... a Ron Howard picture. A friend forced me to watch The Davinci Code, so you got off better than I did.

Seeking Amy said...

"Agnostic on Tom Hanks" interesting Nathaniel what do you mean?

Ugh, Ron Howard, about the only thing I love him for is his narration in Arrested Development. Although I do enjoy some of his fun and silly films too.

I mean A Beautiful Mind could have been so much more interesting, had they actually attempted to show the truth. I mean the closest they hinted to Nash's bisexuality was when he looked at Paul with his shirt with a look that unless you didn't know the real truth, you wouldn't pick up on it! Sigh.

adelutza said...

I was lured into seeing Wolverine against my better judgment. It didn't happen with Angels and Demons>. What's funny is that Hollywood will again draw a conclusion , saying that adults don't go to the movies anymore.Duh.

Anonymous said...

WAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!! Ron Howard is more loved than we are!!!!

This "flowchart" shows just how dead Cracked is in terms of honesty, imagination and intelligence. EVERYBODY has mentioned the Da Vinci Code hair. It is not funny anymore. Besides, he doesn't have the hair in Angels and Demons. But how would Cracked know that? They obviously haven't seen any of these movies.

Back on subject, the hair in "Grinch" was made that way so the characters would look like the Seuss illustrations.

Cracked treats the fact that Ron Howards movies based on true events have liberties taken with them like there was some kind of conspiracy around to keep that a secret, when anybody with an internet connection could go to IMDB or Wikipedia and find out how, and why, certain parts were changed. Also, ALL MOVIES ARE GODDAMN FICTION!! Cracked, on the other hand, is not fiction. It is simply lies.

Also, how do The Missing, EdTV, Ransom, Apollo 13, The Paper, Far and Away, Parenthood, Willow, Take Five, Gung Ho, Cocoon, Splash, Night Shift, and Grand Theft Auto factor into this flowchart?

-Ronfan08

NATHANIEL R said...

seeking i mean that i can't really say i dislike Hanks becuase i very much like him in a few things. But I'm never drawn to anything because he's in it -- so the jury is always out.

ronfan08 well obviously this chart is just trying to have snarkyfun. not every film can be included ;)

but i am not here to diss Howard. I just like to diss the reactions to his work. For the record i like 3 of his movies: splash, parenthood, apollo 13 and don't care a whit about any of the others some of which are fun or ok or bad but i just don't care.

Victor S said...

I totally understand why you gave up on "The Da Vinci Code", but watching only the first 30 minutes you lost the only thing worth recomending: Ian McKellen having the fun of a lifetime (and probably his biggest paycheck ever) being the single one that knew how bad everything was and making fun of everyone around by knowing that.

Kurtis O said...

I was surprised to find that Hanks was perhaps the best thing about "Angels & Demons," a movie so bloated with convoluted exposition that it needs a Hanks type to bring it down to Earth. I can't remember the last time I was so thankful for the presence of a -- gulp -- Regular Joe.

As for Howard, what an inconsistent, hit-or-miss filmmaker he's become. He's one of those rare big-name directors whose name really promises nothing. Disaster? Oscar contender? It's a roll of the dice.

RJ said...

The movie theater I work at is showing Angels and Demons, and I don't know how long the answer 'I haven't seen it' is going to work, but I refuse. The Da Vinci Code was TERRIBLE, and I'm not wasting 138 minutes on another one.

Glenn Dunks said...

I thought Da Vinci Code was terrible for the majority of the running time and then came the end and it became a brand new kind of terrible that I never expected. Skipping Angels and Demons in every conceivable way.

jessica said...

I love Far and Away.

Hate me.

Bailey said...

OMG! I loved Far and Away too, but had NO idea Ron Howard directed it! Weird! Sigh, enter lilting strains of Enya's "Book of Days" lol.

Ugh, Da Vinci Code was a piece of shit. I couldn't get through it either, no matter how much my brother tried. (And I was one of the sheep who LIKED the book when it came out!)

Also share your Hanksian antipathy. I reccommend you not see The Terminal, which is quite possibly the worst movie ever made. No, I am not exaggerating.

NATHANIEL R said...

Bailey... unfortunately I DID see it. In the theaters no less so there was no escape.

Woe was me!

BeRightBack said...

The DaVinci Code is so terrible, just as a movie, leaving aside any other consideration. And such a waste of its actors! Maybe his worst besides Grinch

Doug said...

Angels and Demons was decent for what it was but you can't blame a director for wanting to do a commercial film. Its the only way sometimes for a director to do personal projects for the studio if the make a film that is a guaranteed cash cow for them. I think Ron Howard is a decent enough director but he should start going against the norm and do some real projects.

Chris Na Taraja said...

Ok, this is a severe case of the book is better than the movie. People loved the book so much, that they sort of didn't care that the movei was so bad. Or maybe the movie studio was successful in hooking in on the Divinci Code craze.

I have not read the books, but my brother, who hates to read, loves Dan Browns books. And He claims that Angels and Demons is the better of the two.

I don't really feel a need to see either of them. And I'm kind of tired of explaining that his Davinci Code story is based on a book, Holy Blood Holy Grail that is a load of crap. it was written by these guys who mixed some fact with fiction, and were basically trying to prove that they are the bloodline to the Maravingians and ultimately Christ, so therefore they are the rigthful kings of France. They were having a great piss and now have laughed their way to the bank.

Oh by the way, I'm the Queen of England. So there!

Christian mythology is so male centered, that people are hanging on to this story, probably in a need to balance out the scales of missing a Divine Feminine, or even key women in the story.

Too bad that whatever is SO good about the books have not yet translated onto film.

Chris Na Taraja said...

oh, and I liked GRINCH. I thought it was a fun ride. ok, the Grinch backstory was stupid and unnecessary. And it was another vehicle for Jim Carry, and shouldn't have been, but I still enjoyed it.

I think it would have been really boring if it had just stuck to the original.

Deborah said...

I am a true believer on Tom Hanks, but nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing can make me buy into Dan Brown.

Nick M. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Nick M. said...

The only film by Ron Howard I would ever recommend, out of the 10 I've seen, is Parenthood. But, you know, that could be because of the Weist-factor.

As for Dan Brown abominations, I'll admit to never seeing The Da Vinci Code, but Angels & Demons seems to be getting a free pass simply because it's an unabashed blockbuster and not a pretentious, chatty mystery. It's a terrible film, still, but methinks critics are just pleased that they didn't have to sit through a self-serious slog of a blockbuster; instead, it's just a straightforward, obviously stupid action film.

As someone being introduced to the franchise through the new film (with the exception of reading a few chapters from each novel in a train station bookstore just to be amused by poor writing), here's my review:

http://www.thelmagazine.com/newyork/the-vatican-drag/Content?oid=1175368

Anonymous said...

haha Ron Howard sucks!!

Mr. Movie Geek said...

The sad thing is that that flow chart is one hundred percent accurate.

Pfangirl said...

The Da Vinci Code bored me to tears. Saw Angels & Demons last night and it was far more engaging. Very flawed but a lot more fun.